Sex!!

[lauraann137]

Is there something similar to mumsnet to get advice on sex ?

[Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g]

There's a whole topic here called Sex. You have to have been registered here for three months to post. Failing that, you could ask for advice in this section or in Chat (deleted after three months) or 30 days only (deleted after 30 days).

[lauraann137]

Yeah I can't post in the sex area not been registered more than 3 months

[LidikaLikes]

What's wrong OP?

[lauraann137]

Sorry what is op I don't understand all the little terms on hear lol

[lauraann137]

Right ok, well if you guys don't mind me posting hear ill be great full for advice ,

Me and my partner have been together 2 and a half years, great sex life great relationship we've just got engaged.

The issue, I'm 25 and he is the 2nd sexual partner I've ever had, he is a few years older than me and has had a lot of exs and experience, I experimented with a girl then got into a long term relationship with my kids dad (which wasn't a good experience in whole ) now my relationship with current partner, although he finds me attractive and sexy and he knows all the right words to say I'm u confident with my appearence I do dress up ect just for him, but I never instigate the sex always him I'm worried he might not be in the mood am I saying doing the right thing ect, we was talking last night and even tho he is eager to hear about my experience with a girl he also admitted that he wants me to do more ie foreplay instigate his words... be more suttee in bed..... I don't know where to start or what to do, I feel like a rabbit in headlights. I feel stupid I go shy and embarrassed which is ridiculous because when we do have sex Im not at all shy it's just the start bit

[lauraann137]

Maybe I should just do something outrageous just to get over the nervousness

[pocketsaviour]

The only way to get over that feeling of anxiety around initiating is just to start doing it, in my experience.

If you have a fear of rejection, it's horrible thinking he might say "nah". But equally, he has to face that fear every time he initiates, right? And if you say "no", it doesn't mean you don't love him or fancy him, just that you don't want it right there and then, yes?

Same goes for you. If he says "I'm too tired" one time, it's not the end of your relationship. It just means he's too tired.

As to how to do it - I'd suggest if you're in bed, put your arm round him, rub your hand over his chest, kiss his shoulder or neck and say "Fancy a bit of fun?" or "Are you up for it?" or whatever phrase you'd usually use. Then assuming he says yes, start the foreplay. I'd usually grab his cock and then start a blowjob. Usually gets things moving nicely

[littleleftie]

Having read your previous threads about this abusive cockwomble, I am not surprised to see you are now having anxiety about your sex life.

You are walking on eggshells, doing whatever you can to appease him - it's terribly unhealthy love.

Is there nobody you can talk to in real life about this relationship and how it makes you feel?

[lauraann137]

Cockwomble lol that made me laugh lol. Littleleftie things have dramatically improved since my last thread fingers crossed I won't be posting like that again, I don't really have that relationship with the girls I know, my best friend who I would usually talk to has got a massive thing going on in her life atm and I have very little to do with my family.