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Support for Friend

(5 Posts)
SellFridges Mon 14-Dec-15 14:18:39

I've had a quick browse, so forgive me if this is covered elsewhere.

I'm looking for some ideas on how to support a friend who appears to be in an abusive relationship. She's admitted levels of financial abuse - he won't pay for the DC's activities or clothes for example, and keeps money from a payrise for himself while she took the financial hit when she had to reduce hours to do childcare as he wont allow the DC to go to a childminder or similar. She also admitted that he calls her fat (size 10) and he's constantly having a go at her for the state of the house. I know the second bits are just proof he's unpleasant rather than abusive but I suspect if I dug deeper there'd be more worrying things.

She says she has thought of leaving but won't do that to the kids.

Is there any help I can give? We live 100 miles apart sad

category12 Mon 14-Dec-15 16:23:03

Signpost her to information about financial and emotional abuse, offer a temporary refuge (if you can) and whatever emotional/practical support is feasible. Point her to mumsnet.

Namechanger2015 Mon 14-Dec-15 16:24:33

Give her info about the Freedom Programme online or (even better) in person if she can.

SellFridges Mon 14-Dec-15 17:52:11

Thank you. I'll look into those things. She doesn't have independent internet access - she has a crappy phone while he has an iPhone - so it's a bit tricky. I'll read up though and make some suggestions to her.

sadwidow28 Mon 14-Dec-15 20:02:25

Womens Aid will give you advice if your a worried about your friend:

I’m worried about someone else - Women's Aid

Women’s Aid defines domestic abuse as an incident or pattern of incidents of controlling, coercive, threatening, degrading and violent behaviour, including sexual violence, by a partner or ex-partner.

Tel: 0117 944 44 11 (general enquiries only)

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