Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

Need some hand holding

(11 Posts)
100thattemptatausername Sat 10-Oct-15 19:48:26

I've posted a bit before.
I'm useless and weak so ignored all of the great advice you all gave me here and got back involved with my ex, he became distant again, cancelled dates at the last minute, spent dates on his phone.
I've finally text him (not a nice way to do it) tonight and broke it off.
He hasn't replied I'm not sure if I'm happy about that.
I feel relieved I'm getting myself out of this cycle and know this is the last time. But he's posted pictures on Facebook of him on a night out, I know this is it but I'm suddenly wavering.
Can anyone give me some support or something?

RedMapleLeaf Sat 10-Oct-15 19:54:56

What's making you waver?

mintoil Sat 10-Oct-15 19:59:35

Block him on facebook. Cyber stalking him is just emotional self harming.

Do you have any friends you could call up to come over with a bottle of wine or something? Go to the cinema?

It's hard coming out of an abusive relationship, and you need to be kind to yourself and give yourself plenty of time to rebuild your self esteem.

100thattemptatausername Sat 10-Oct-15 20:00:54

A couple of reasons he looks so happy. I almost forgot how he looks when he's so happy and I sent the text after he didn't reply to an earlier one for a couple of hours but now I realise he was just busy.
I've made the right choice for me but I love him and wanted us to work so badly. I think that's the main reason.

100thattemptatausername Sat 10-Oct-15 20:01:48

There's no one I can call over they all told me to get out long ago and when I text them they told me this is my own fault basically and I shouldn't be feeling like this.

RedMapleLeaf Sat 10-Oct-15 20:03:25

They don't sound very good friends!

spanisharmada Sat 10-Oct-15 20:06:50

Ah that sounds shit, unfortunately I've been there myself!
Definitely unfriend on FB, just cut contact completely. You're only going to make yourself miserable otherwise. Do you really still want to be in this same position in 5 years? Get out now!!!!!

ThisIsStillFolkGirl Sat 10-Oct-15 20:39:02

Unfriend him on fb. That way his photos won't keep cropping up.

I know it probably feels like your friends are being unsupportive, but I suspect they've listened to you talk about this guy a lot and thete comes a point where you have to didtance yoursekf from other people's poor choices.

Take the advice this time and block him.

If he's a twat, you don't love him, you're just emotionally attached from him. Keep telling yourself that flowers

100thattemptatausername Sat 10-Oct-15 20:42:54

Thank you all. I just got off the phone with my brother who told me the same as you all have.
He is now blocked on Facebook, I cannot go back. He is not worth the heartbreak.
thisisstillfolkgirl your probably right about my friends

ThisIsStillFolkGirl Sat 10-Oct-15 20:48:29

That doesn't mean they don't care, of course. They're still your friends.

They just don't want to repeat it ad infinitum either.

If they know it's for good, you might get a different response.

Glad to hear you've blocked him.

When I ended my last relationship, I was really upset about it, even though it was my choice. I deleted him from fb and blocked him on whatsapp because it would have hurt too much to be reminded that his life was still going on without me. Other men, I haven't bothered blocking because I haven't felt the need. It really does help smile

100thattemptatausername Sat 10-Oct-15 20:51:09

That reminds me I should block him on whatsapp as well.
I don't understand how this one has got inside in this way, but he's really done a number on me.
I just keep reminding myself I will find someone better whenever I am ready too and am truly over this mess of a relationship.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now