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Finally done it and said I want a divorce

(2 Posts)
shouldIjustputupwithit Tue 22-Sep-15 22:52:13

After many years of asking for opinions on here and everyone telling me I shouldn't put up with it I have finally asked H for a divorce.

We have a mortgaged house which was originally his grandparents and we have an 11 year old son (older daughter away at uni). I said I wanted to stay in the house intol DS 18 then we could make further decisions. He said he doesn't want to leave - why should he? He can't afford to live here on his wages whereas I can (just lol!)

Legally how does this work? Can I demand he leaves? What about DS can I say I want him to stay with me? I can't imagine he would want him although he's now playing the perfect father even though usually he's crap.

How do you actually get divorced? Probably should have looked that up first! Any advice gratefully received. I finally feel a weight has been lifted off my chest

Thank you

Morganly Tue 22-Sep-15 23:35:46

The weight lifted from your chest is excellent news.

So to practicalities:

The fact that the house was originally his grandparents' is irrelevant. It's a marital asset now.

Your assets will be split to meet both your needs and primarily, those of your son so there is a strong possibility that you may need to sell the house and both buy smaller/cheaper properties.

Is one of you main carer for your son? You could go for 50 50 in which case neither of you are likely to need to pay maintenance but you will both need a fair share of the house value. You could ask for your son to be with you more than with him. He would have to agree. He might be required to pay maintenance but would still be entitled to a share of the house value in order to buy himself somewhere to live.

You really need to get some legal advice. Make this your next step.

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