How to tackle this....

[Ilovecain]

Need to bring this up with dh as not a one-off behaviour and to be honest am sick of it!
I have had virus for a few days, never get ill or have time off work so quite a rarity! Been in bed all day while he did a 12 hour shift at work. 3 yo was here with me all day, a friend collecting and dropped off 8 yo ds. He came home at five starving as doing a shake diet thing. I had done the children spaghetti for tea. Planned to cook mince into chilli for us later. After kids had tea I went to lie down, then came down, put the chilli on, then went back up and got children ready for bed. I then laid down and fell asleep. Woke up to what the fucks this? Shouting from bottom of stairs, ranting and slamming, calling me a martyr. I presume it burnt and he wasn't best pleased. I said nothing, no energy to shout down stairs nor inclination. He threw the pan in the wheely bin and banged and crashed a little more, lasted about ten minutes, I'm so done with the toddler tantrums when he's hungry or tired. He's not four!!

Hell now ignore me and then tomorrow eve make a dig like, I don't know what I've done wrong.... How can I bring this up. He always flares up when I try and have an adult conversation with him. Can't have this role model for our children or the rest of my marriage like this :(

[kittybiscuits]

He sounds delightful. Poor you. Naughty step? For 40 minutes. Or however old he is supposed to be.

[FunFunFunInTheSunSunSun]

Jeez, the man needs to grow up! My bloke gets what we call Hangry (Hunger Anger!) but he's fully aware of it. All I have to say is:

"Are you hangry darling?"

Then he stops, thinks and then twigs that, yes he is hungry!

He promptly follows it with an apology and we then discuss eating, as to who cooks and what they cook.

But I can guarantee if I was ill he would cook, without question.

If my DH kicked off like that over dinner being burnt while I was simultaneously being ill, cooking AND looking after the kids he'd get both barrels. And he knows it. And he'd know he deserved it too!...

When you're better, when the kids are out, let him know what a selfish, immature prick he is. And don't hold back!

[Ilovecain]

Thanks for replies,

He knows he gets hangry, jokes about it when he's in normal mode and that he's given it to our son!! Just can't control it and also can't seem to ever say sorry!
I just went down as realised I forgot to feed the dog, he hasn't chucked the pan, must have been something else slammed in there! He glanced up from his phone and asked if I was feeling better, I said no, then when I walked back upstairs said sarkily, night then..... I ignored him then he retorted with night to you too, I said ' sorry should've been the first word'

He just mumbled for fucks sake.....

[Ilovecain]

What cracks me up is we live in a two up two down..... He was about 6 metres from the pan at all times! Whilst sat on his phone.....

[FunFunFunInTheSunSunSun]

My DH gets phone obsessed too. And I throw major strops if he's sat on his phone laughing at inane tripe on facebook while I'm running round doing everything. I get the huffs, the rolled eyes and the FFS's too but he ends up apologising because he knows it's not fair, and I won't put up with it.

Stuff like that can wait until dinners done, dishwashers loaded and DS is bathed and put to bed...and not before!!

[Ilovecain]

He literally never ever says sorry

[BathtimeFunkster]

If you've been sick all day, why the fuck were you making dinner?

He sounds like a lazy, nasty prick.