OLD Aggressive men?

[nutterseverywhere]

Not really a question, just putting it out there that I am amazed at the number of men who you meet for a first date (which may go really well) & then not long after they show their true colours & aggression raises its' ugly head. No wonder they're single! So far I've had one throwing his toys out of the pram because I asked nicely (innocent) questions about his job - unfortunately he picked a career topic to bullshit about that I knew a lot about. Next one got arsey because I couldn't cancel my friday night plans to see him (suggested other times) but he also wouldn't consider cancelling/moving any of his plans to see me? Then there're the married nutters who expect you to go along with 'yeah we're separated' (but still living under the same roof with no divorce started). And don't get me started on the ones who seem ok but then you find out they're completely impotent or totally useless in the sack. how can you get to 50+ & not know your way around a vagina?

[Nevergoingtolearn]

I met one guy who seemed lovely, after the 3rd date I started to worry, he had a very short fuse and was obsessed with the thought of being cheated on, he was ex army and one day said 'I'm not sure what I would do if someone cheated on me, I have been trained yo kill' , he then went off on one when a old friend messaged me ( a male friend ), I was really quite scared. I dumped him the next day by text.

I had another one that send me abusive messages because I didn't want a second date.

I'm now much more careful xx

[LovelyFriend]

it's crap isn't it?

I've been single for nearly 3 years and can't bring myself to do OLD again - previous experiences involved all the horrors you have mentioned and then some.

What about the ones who talk constantly about the ex in a bitter way

For now at least, I'd rather be single.

[LovelyFriend]

I met one guy who seemed quite nice and then when we DTD eventually he started pulling my hair and putting his hands (albeit lightly) around my neck. Totally freaked me out.
I declined to see him again, and he totally freaked out & got angry, teary and abusive.

[Coolforthesummer]

I have met a few who have taken it very personally when I haven't wanted to see them again.

I agree some are very aggressive but you only see it when you try to end it. It makes you wonder what they would be like in a full-on relationship.

I think many of them don't actually like women.

[rumred]

It's not just men. I've had some horrible exchanges with women. Really unpleasant. One insulted and blocked me when I asked if she had a picture. several have initiated sexual conversations without meeting and just plain inappropriately. I have loads of stories. I reckon it's just like real life - lots of bonkers people about. It's just more concentrated with old

[ThinkYouKnowMe]

I've been Online dating now for months, I haven't even been on a date yet. I've had rather a few messages from men, who I've just not send anything back of they wasn't my type. They then send more messages calling me a slag and cock teaser. I've now had to put on my profile that I don't do hook ups, one night stands. I don't send nudes to some one who I've never met! Why they think that women would do that anyway is rather worrying. Even after saying all that I've been messaging back and forth to a few potential dates, some I've even given them my Kik name to get in touch that way. They are lovely for a few days, we start to arrange a date. One guy asked me for a phot in my underwear to recognise me for when we meet up and the latest one keep saying that he wanted me to go back to his house after our first date. I've had to block them both because one send me around 30 odd messages saying what a bitch I was and they other send me dick pics.wtf!

[HelenaDove]

Why arent these men who send dick pics getting visits from the police? Its no different from flashing someone in the park.

And surely the police have set a precedent after the item i saw on the news yesterday about a teenager getting into trouble for sending a pic to someone.

[Nevergoingtolearn]

I have only been doing it a few months and have had many cock photos, though I can see the funny side, funny because these men actually think we will find their manhood a turn on ( most the time it's very disappointing ), I have one guy at the moment that seemed really nice ant then he started sending me videos of himself .

I have been seeing a guy who talks about his ex way too much ( not a turn on ).

I am struggling to find anyone that doesn't have issues or are not useless in the sack.

[LovelyFriend]

Sending unrequested cock photos to someone you don't know - what are these guys thinking. It's a bit like unwanted advances/sexual harassment by strangers on the street.

They really need to be called out on it. They won't be getting visits from the police unless people report it.

[pocketsaviour]

Think do you have "short term dating" or "casual dating" selected on your profile?

Lots of men assume these are code words for casual sex/hookups/booty calls etc.

Use the block feature wisely.

As far as I'm aware it's not illegal to send someone a naked photo of yourself. The case Helena referred to was recorded on file on the grounds that the boy was underage. (He was not arrested or charged. BBC story. )

[LovelyFriend]

Looks like you are right pocket.

Its mind boggling that strangers can send us unwanted obscene images and there's nothing wrong with that in the eyes of the law.

[HelenaDove]

Blimey i didnt realise he was underage.


LovelyFriend i totally agree.

[Northumberlandlass]

I have been OLD for a few months. Had a few dates, found a few who got aggressive after I didn't reply to a message.
Block Block Block.
Some seem fine, then boom once you swap numbers they want to FaceTime me to I can watch them wank..

[JasmineBuckles]

I have been OLD on and off for about two years. I have never ever had a cock picture, not even from Tinder that has a terrible reputation for being a hook-up site.
I've been out with one guy who by the second date made it spectacularly obvious that he was a huge misogynist, but no really unpleasant, aggressive men.
I do have a method. I only respond to messages that are in full sentences, spelled correctly and are fairly articulate. Not "hi".
I screen out the ones without a professional job or successfully self-employed, not because I'm gold-digging, I don't need to be, but because I've found them less likely to be of the types listed above.

Finally, I don't screen out the ones who aren't conventionally handsome. I'm attracted to personality, intelligence and drive, so I don't dismiss the less attractive men. The stunning ones are often wankers anyway !

[Nevergoingtolearn]

What is it with cock photos? I have just had a man send me some quite disturbing photos which I can only describe as 'hardcore homemade porn', this guy is actually a policeman so should know better ( or he tells me he's a policeman, this may not be true ), I have now blocked him. I think I seem to attract these men, I speak to a few meant on POF, I get a lot of messages but I try and be picky with which ones I reply too but still most of them send me photos.

[ChilliAndMint]

I'm not in a hurry to go back to OLD. I thought after my last brief "relationship" ( RL meeting) I'd give it another go, BTBH I've met some truly obnoxious men.

What I have found to be a common thread with most of these men is their level of secrecy. I don't mean stuff like where they live or work, just everyday normal things you could discuss with anyone.

[Twinklestein]

If the police visited men who sent dick pics they'd have no time for anything else.

They'd be visiting each other too.

[Bluewombler2k]

I honestly thought this was a thread on angry male pensioners until about halfway though, then it clicked what you are all on about. Oh dear, that will teach me for skim-reading with pregnancy brain on.

[experiencedhider]

One of the first men I met OLD seemed fine when we met for a quick coffee, so I agreed to a second date. Unfortunately I got lost(was new in the city) so called him for directions. He went off on one, told me he'd had enough of this and hung up, leaving me stuck in a totally unfamiliar area. At least finding out early saved me from wasting any more times on dates with him!

[UrbaneFox]

wow. This is so depressing. Apart from not getting very far, nothing terrible has happened to me so far. But it's early days.

I agree, some hate women. I 'discarded' from my list a man who said "no bunny boilers please". in other words, I take no responsibility for my own bad behaviour and choices Dem wimmen do be bitches.

[Nevergoingtolearn]

Well the bloke I have been seeing for a month her so has now randomly vanished, is not answering my messages and is ignoring me on FB. No great loss really and he wasn't really my type but still makes me angry that they can't just say 'it's not working', I seem to get to the 2nd or 3rd date, they tell me they really like me and want to see me again and then they vanish off the face of the earth , I think I'm going to close my OLD accounts and just stay single.

[LovelyFriend]

experienced maybe something else to take from that experience is to meet a stranger either somewhere you are familiar with, or at least very close to tube/train/center etc so you don't feel lost again. Safety first!

[UrbaneFox]

I think I'll probably end up doing the same, just accepting that I'm single. I've been doing that, mostly, for years, then I felt this burst of ''I ought to at least try". Well, when I know I tried and there just aren't any men out there who're decent, good company and good humoured, then I suppose it will make giving up a little easier. I don't feel lonely that often. So I don't know why I put myself through this!