Back story - 6 months ago, H announced out of the blue that he was leaving ( married 15 years , 3 kids ) . He told me he'd found a house and wanted me to sign documents that released money from a business we both own to buy it .
I was in state of shock , came on MN. Everyone said " agree to nothing until you've spoke to lawyer . I assumed there was OW but couldn't find any evidence and Dh denied it .
Lawyer said - don't agree to anything, try to keep everything stable for the kids , get him to wait for a couple of months until teenager sits exams ( well she said a lot more but that's the relevant bit ) .
Dh agreed to wait a few months , he moved into the spare room under a pretext for kids and we are in the process of selling the business we own jointly . This will give me enough money to buy him out of the house and to afford to live here without his income .
Teenager finishes exams in the summer and Dh suddenly announces that he wants to stay and " try to make it work " . I'm a bit shocked and don't know what I want . I assumed he had been dumped by OW. So talked to a counsellor and decided to give it a few months to see what happens.
Dh does nothing different , just goes on living in the spare room and leading his own life. Only difference from 6 months ago is that he does his share of child taxi duties ( which as very onerous are our kids do a lot and we live in the country ) . He does NOTHING that I would think of as " trying to make the marriage work " .
He has given every appearance of having OW. Has gone on a diet and lost weight . Started exercising . Talking about getting an op to fix his bald spot . Has had several operations on his eyes so he " doesn't have to wear glasses in bed " .
Last night he informed me that there never was anyone else - it's all just " a game " to shock me into realising how hard life would be without him .
I am just incandescent with rage . He's put me through 6 months of pretending he wants to leave , believing that our marriage is over , trying to sell the business . Worrying about the kids, seeing a counsellor and lawyer AS A GAME ??? a fucking game ????
What the hell do I do now ?
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Relationships
Husband playing mind games - please help
Samantha28 · 28/08/2015 07:54
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