Narcissistic mother has terminal cancer

[Wryip11]

and actually my first feeling when I heard (apart from not being sure I believed it) was relief. Am I a horrible person?

[NoMilkNoSugar]

No you're not. Sorry I don't really have much advice for you, but

[FadedRed]

Sound a fairly human response to me.

[LumelaMme]

No. When my narc father died - though I didn't know the term at the time - I just felt overwhelming relief that he would no longer be able to turn up and try to ruin my life.

It's really sad when a family relationship has come to such a pass, and it's bloody tough to have that sort of a parent.

[Wando]

It's normal. She gave you nothing by the sound of it - just took.

[Chocolou]

Like lumela I'd not heard of the term either.
3 years ago my mother called to say she was terminally ill and had 12 months to live. I really didn't know what to say to her. I couldn't even tell her I loved her. I made the decision not to travel to see her (she lives 400 miles away) and it was the best decision of my life. The relief I had knowing she was dead was unbelievable. It was only then I realised how shit she had made me feel growing up.

I totally sympathise with you op. Pm me if you want to chat.

[Smilingforth]

It's good to see you are not alone. There are a lot more cases out just like you and what you are feeling is normal.

[Imbroglio]

Have you got some support? This will be difficult time for you.

[Wando]

If you don't have any please keep posting - you will get great support here but that is much better combined with someone real on the ground.

[Wryip11]

Thanks all. Felt really weird as only a few months ago I realised what she is. My dd says she feels nothing too which is good for her - we lost my MIL earlier this year who she was really close too. Need to look after myself