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Help me - finances making me stay in a shit relationship.

(4 Posts)
ShouldILTB Sat 22-Aug-15 19:18:57

Have nc (although I nc when I changed pw after all the hacking stuff) so this is an old name!

I need your help.

I want him gone - no violence or anything untoward but we're dead as a couple and it's getting snipey and mean spirited. We have 2 kids, so I don't want to go down the route of negativity.

Few issues to consider
1) DP rents his place out to another family member (unofficially but not illegally - its complicated) but we will be making someone homeless.
2) I am on ML so for the first time ever am financially dependent on DP

Main issue for me is how I will cope financially. DP is self employed but plans to go back to education soon so wont be able to pay much I am due back at work in a few months but my childcare is more per more per week than I clear.

How the fuck can I make this work?

Childcare is £570 a week. I can't cover this let let alone bills on my own. Even with WTC & Kiddicare vouchers I am still going to at a loss.

So confused and worried that finances will keep me putting up with a shit relationship.

ShouldILTB Sat 22-Aug-15 19:23:03

God sorry for typos. I was trying to post quickly!

Basically what I clear weekly, wouldn't even cover my childcare let alone rent and other bills.

QuiteLikely5 Sat 22-Aug-15 19:27:09

Have you looked on the turn2us website calculator?

If not check it out. It will predict the help you will get as a single parent.

Also are you in a mortgaged property? Will you want to remain there?

Council tax will be reduced for you.

Also it may be worth only working PT and claiming WTC as sometimes you are better off than if working FT

Lweji Sat 22-Aug-15 19:39:44

1) not your problem. Give enough time for them to find a new place
2) maybe he should reconsider as it's his responsibility as a parent to provide for his children. Also push for 50-50 if possible, as you could maybe save on child care. It shouldn't be your childcare!

And I'd look at all benefits and discounts you could get, as suggested.

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