Our marriage has been in trouble and we are in counselling together. He (so I thought) had a historic drink problem - it was a major issue for many years until he hit rock bottom and went dry for a few years. He then started drinking again - slowly at first but it built up. I was monitoring it and pushing him to moderate - which I thought he had - only to recently discover that he had been secret binge drinking for years from the boot of his car when I was in bed at night at weekends. He has now gone dry again.
I brought this up at our weekly marriage counselling session - he got angry as he didnt think it necessary to discuss as he was now dry (8 days - apparently) - his out burst was around that alcoholism is a disease (although he denies he is an alcoholic - just has a "drink problem") and that as he has had to put up with my 3 bouts of depression over the last 14 years (x2PND and after the sudden death of my mother) when he has had to endure me looking dishevelled and being depressed - so I should be sympathetic and compassionate to him and his illness.
Is this reasonable? He never complained when I was ill - he mostly dissociated himself - but clearly it has festered.
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DH has "put up with my depression so I need to accept his alcoholism"
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13months · 03/08/2015 01:14
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