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Relationships

1 month old too young for football?

284 replies

charlottetrip · 30/07/2015 09:26

I don't know if I've posted this in the right place, but any way.
My bf wants to take our 4 week old baby to football match on Saturday. I think this is far to young to be going. However when I expressed my feelings it was if I was being irrational and over worrying for not letting him go.
I'd just like to know other people's thoughts?

OP posts:
crazytyke · 30/07/2015 09:27

depends what he's going to do with him. 90 mins wrapped up in a sling with ears covered won't do much harm. anything else is likely to result in over stimulated screaming meltdown.

TelephoneIgnoringMachine · 30/07/2015 09:28

Surely a 1 month old mostly just feeds & sleeps? Mine did! I can't imagine why anyone would want to do this - what does he imagine the baby would get from it...?

PatriciaHolm · 30/07/2015 09:41

I can't see any reason why this appeals to him at all, other than to use the baby as some sort of trophy; "look at me! What a cool dad I am! No baby gets in the way of my football!"

I'm all for getting babies to fit into your life where you can, and I think I did things when my babies were tiny that others wouldn't want to do - out to dinner with DD at 4 days old, for example - but this just sounds silly and needless.

BattlestarSpectacular · 30/07/2015 09:47

God I can't think of anything worse! What if the baby has a spectacular shit up their back and he has to push his way through the crowds to change the nappy (vest, top, trousers, wash hair...).

Then the baby might want milk (I'm guessing you're not there so now he has to make up a bottle, heat etc.).

Babies hate the wind in their face so he'll have to angle himself to shield baby's face.

Then the baby is over stimulated so starts crying fit.

No. Fucking. Way.

CherryBonBon · 30/07/2015 09:52

It's a monumentally stupid idea.

A tiny infant who needs to feed/sleep in a noisy crowded outdoor venue with limited facilities.

Stupid.

charlottetrip · 30/07/2015 10:08

He just doesn't seem to think logically and just want to show him to his friends which I can understand. I asked if there wasn't another way around it. I also said it will be much better for him to go when he actually understands what is going on. BF didn't understand why I was getting upset over him going, which in turn made me more annoyed that he wasn't understanding my pov.

OP posts:
DawnMumsnet · 30/07/2015 12:18

Hi charlottetrip,

We're just going to move your thread over to our Relationships topic.

Congratulations on your new baby, btw. Flowers

Twinklestein · 30/07/2015 12:22

What a ridiculous idea. If he wants to show his friends, why not do it at your house or the pub?

A baby's not a pet to 'show' off.

Just tell him it's not happening. And to grow up from me.

Anon4Now2015 · 30/07/2015 12:27

Mine went at that age - in fact one of them was younger I think. It was absolutely fine. I really don't see how it's any different to taking them to a picnic or a coffee morning with friends. I think it's lovely that he wants to take the baby along with him and I really don't understand what everyone is getting so upset about.

Cabrinha · 30/07/2015 12:30

Of course a baby should be shown off! He's proud!
I think it's a lovely idea. All time together is potentially good.
At 1 month, my daughter would have been perfectly happy.

If he has a nappy bag, a bottle (presumably not EBF or this wouldn't even be an option!) and a sling, and loves him and has the sense to can it if baby gets upset - go for it!

Worst that happens is he misses half the match in the refreshment area jiggling baby around. Which is just being a parent.

Is this more because you're not ready to be apart from baby? Not a criticism - I wouldn't have been.

Some babies love attention, noise, something to look at. And all babies love daddy cuddles.

Get a junior kit Grin

Imlookingatboats · 30/07/2015 12:32

I wouldn't. No. My husband took our baby out for the day at 6 weeks. The difference was he wasn't among screaming crowds and didn't have to fight his way through hoards to get to any baby changing facilities.

BitOutOfPractice · 30/07/2015 12:37

Why? Why would you want to take a newborn to football?

Cabrinha · 30/07/2015 12:38

Fight through hoards? He'll walk to the end of a seated aisle, back through a quiet tunnel, and if changing facilities are easily reached, pop the mat on the floor in the refreshment area and do what parents do.
It's probably quieter during a game than walking through a shopping centre!

Cabrinha · 30/07/2015 12:42

Why would you take a newborn anywhere?

Because it's nice to show them off. Because it's nice to get on with your life - and sometimes a necessity, though I know football isn't.
Because many babies love getting out and about?
Because it's bonding for a parent and baby to spend time together?
90 minutes of 1:1 cuddles and daddy whispering commentary to his child?
I think it's lovely!

BackforGood · 30/07/2015 12:45

Depends on the match.
If it's your local league team, and he normally would pop own there on a weekend, then it's as nice a place for a walk out in the fresh air as anywhere else. Same as going for a walk down to the park, but this way he will see his mates. Probably a proud new Dad, wanting to show off his new baby - I wouldn't have a problem with that (as long as it's not chucking it down with rain).
If, however, you are talking about a Premier League stadium, then it's just ridiculous.

Charlie97 · 30/07/2015 12:46

What sort of football match is it? That makes a big difference in my opinion.

Is it a premiership game with a large capacity crowd, or is it a local small team with a low capacity crowd.

Can totally understand the latter, but the former (I do attend premiership football matches, fairly regularly) is not a suitable environment in my opinion. I myself sometimes feel crushed in the crowd and indeed, I have only recently recovered from a ruptured Achilles tendon and would not have gone to a game without being fully recovered. Not the same as having a baby strapped to you, but the general idea is that I felt "vulnerable" and so should anyone with a baby in a sling in that environment.

So, is it a big match or a small local team.

A small local team with a few friendly supporters and plenty of space I think would be lovely for OH to show off his pride and joy!

cashewnutty · 30/07/2015 12:46

I think it depends whether it is a quieter, low level local match or a big busy premier league shebang? If it is a local match then i think no problem. Any big match where there is potential for lots of jostling and violence then i would say no.

Charlie97 · 30/07/2015 12:47

cross post with BackforGood!!

PaperFlowers · 30/07/2015 12:50

I think it sound lovely myself but I am expecting my first in January so no real experience. Assuming he loves his son or daughter and is not an idiot he will know if it's not working. Is it a local match? That won't be as full on as a premiership game and they all seem to have family sections these days.

Love51 · 30/07/2015 12:53

Football isn't my sport, but I'm fairly sure I took my pfb to a rugby match at a similar age. I think it would depend a bit on the match, I wouldn't want them to go to a match with 'needle'. Easier a newborn than a toddler! My 3 yo was desparate to go to football (her childminder is a passionate fan and the local team logo is everywhere in that house) - her dad took her to a youth team match - local team vs big premiership team dh supports. They only stayed for the first half (it was free) and although i think she got a bit bored, they both seemed happy. Do you think bf would compromise with a less popular fixture?

BertrandRussell · 30/07/2015 12:55

Why on earth shouldn't he if he wants to?

And whoever said a baby is not a pet to be shown off- they so are!! I used to dress mine up and take them to Tescos to be cooed over. Wonderful for the ego.

And why shouldn't he do the look at me I'm a dad bit?

The baby'll be in a sling and won't know whether he's at the football or at the park.

Cabrinha · 30/07/2015 12:56

I've only experienced jostling at a premier league match as everyone is leaving.
So, sit back and chat to baby for 10 minutes, pointing to the ground and telling him he might play there one day, til the rush clears. Sorted Smile

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firesidechat · 30/07/2015 13:03

I think it's ok as long as:

You are bottle feeding.

He will remember to change nappies.

It isn't an overcrowded, very noisy space and is safe for a baby.

If he is a trustworthy father who has done his fair share of baby care at home and knows what he is doing, isn't it good that he wants to take his baby out?

FredaMayor · 30/07/2015 13:03

A month old? Right now DC wants to be at home, with you, OP. You'll have plenty of time to get out and about later on.

BertrandRussell · 30/07/2015 13:05

Right now DC wants to be at home, with you, OP"

No, he just wants to be cuddled up to someone who loves him. He doesn't care where he is.

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