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I think husband has a secret phone

(74 Posts)
Louisa111 Sat 18-Jul-15 16:18:12

I've just found a blackberry phone charger upstairs near dh computer, we both gave iPhones. It's obviously been used recently as never come across it before.
Now what would you do?? Confront or stay quiet??

I suspected last year he was having an affair with a work colleague , too many things didn't add up, I know they used to speak on the he phone ALOT and wasn't happy about it. At the time I used to just question, question, question which I know was wrong cause if he was he just got better at hiding it.

And now I've found this?? He got given a blackberry last year as a work phone, didn't want to use it and it just got put away in a drawer and tbh I forgot about it until now when I've found this charger!!

Now what would you do?? Confront, hide the charger or just say nothing in the hope I someday find this phone?? He's at work I found it when I was hoovering shock

BolshierAyraStark Sat 18-Jul-15 16:21:36

Say nothing & look for the phone?
I couldn't keep quiet though, would probably just say I'd seen it & await his reaction.

AuntyMag10 Sat 18-Jul-15 16:23:13

Has he been using his work phone recently for work purposes? Maybe they have asked that he starts using it?

Floundering Sat 18-Jul-15 16:26:14

Hide the charger & watch his reaction.

If he genuinely needs it for work he'll be looking openly for it, but if it's for nookie purposes he'll go quietly mad.

TRexingInAsda Sat 18-Jul-15 16:28:17

He's been cheating for a year then? - I'd stop fannying about playing with phone chargers and just LTB tbh.

tribpot Sat 18-Jul-15 16:29:38

I would hide the charger too and see what his reaction is. If he put the Blackberry away in a drawer, is it still in there?

Louisa111 Sat 18-Jul-15 16:30:56

It's not that simple as just leave! We have a daughter! I rather catch him
Out than just leave.
I'm sure it's not work purposes he uses his phone.
If I hide charger he could know I'm
On to him or shall I just put it back and make it my mission to find phone

Louisa111 Sat 18-Jul-15 16:31:29

Blackberry isn't in drawer I guessed it wouldn't be

tribpot Sat 18-Jul-15 16:34:57

Why would he know you're on to him? This is what happens.

He comes home. Needs to charge the work phone that he has been asked to use as per AuntyMag's suggestion. Can't find charger where he left it. Says 'have you seen the charger?' you say 'Oh, I wasn't sure what it was for so I put it away in [x place]' and give it to him. Mystery solve.

Or

He comes home. Needs to charge the phone he is using to contact his mistress. He could try and brazen it out and say 'where's my charger' at which point you can still play innocent and say you just put it away but that you didn't realise he was using his work Blackberry and can you have the number to put in your phone. But more likely he will quietly go mad wondering where it is but without being able to say so.

Your challenge is to find a hiding place which is both plausible and where he won't look.

Floundering Sat 18-Jul-15 16:47:48

It is perfectly possible to LTB with children, but in this case I would want to know then pack his bags & tell him to go his mistress.

Melonfool Sat 18-Jul-15 16:54:19

Are you sure it isn't a generic type he could be using to charge something else? A BlackBerry brand that came with the phone but he now uses it to charge or upload to the Kindle or something? Don't Blackberrys just use micro USB these days? We have loads of things in the house that use micro USB chargers.

Louisa111 Sat 18-Jul-15 17:22:21

I've just found the blackberry phone deep in drawer, not being used. Feel
Abit silly now but also relieved. I'd love to know what he was using charger for but I guess I'm
Wrong on this occasion

ImperialBlether Sat 18-Jul-15 17:41:13

Is it a Kindle charger? I can't remember what the Blackberry charger looks like.

Hate to say it but just because the Blackberry's in the drawer, it doesn't mean it's not being used. Have you switched it on?

TaliZorahVasNormandy Sat 18-Jul-15 17:45:24

He might have been using the charger. I have a blackberry and they work with a lot of other things.

But I'd check the phone, just in case.

chdmum20 Sat 18-Jul-15 17:48:24

blackberry works with samsung devices and many others smile

ThereIsIron Sat 18-Jul-15 17:51:21

A BlackBerry charger is essentially a micro usb charger which will charge pretty much any device on the market today (except Apple stuff).

Louisa111 Sat 18-Jul-15 17:58:47

Do you think I have cause to worry??

WhySoAngry Sat 18-Jul-15 18:09:22

found the blackberry phone deep in drawer

Certainly check the phone when you get the chance. If it's not been used for some time it most likely won't start up. It will need charging first.

If it does start up, and has lots of charge, you may have cause to worry.

Lacoba66 Sat 18-Jul-15 18:09:31

Put it this way OP- if the charger was out, then what was he using it to charge? Obviously not his iPhone.

Have you switched the Blackberry on? Is it charged up? He's not using it for work obviously. Are there any other devices that he could have used it to charge?

If there isn't, then I would still wonder if he has another phone...

Tryharder Sat 18-Jul-15 18:31:47

You came to the conclusion that your DH has a 'secret phone' on the basis of a random charger lying around.

Then you said that actually your DH had been given a blackberry as a work phone. So not a secret phone then!

I have no idea if your suspicions regarding the girl at work are based on anything concrete or not.

But I worry that people are advising LTB - and causing untold financial and emotional fallout - on the basis of a phone charger.

On what you have told us, I see no evidence of infidelity.

itaintmebabe Sat 18-Jul-15 18:38:56

Bit why would the charger be out if he's not using it?

TheoriginalLEM Sat 18-Jul-15 18:48:40

How can you be with someone who is cheating on you? sad

morethanpotatoprints Sat 18-Jul-15 18:52:03

Did his work give him the Blackberry about the same time as you had suspicions of an affair?

I would turn it on and see if it is charged, then you'll know.
Only you know if you have cause for concern, has anything different happened over this time? Has his behaviour changed at all?

dementedma Sat 18-Jul-15 18:55:33

Agree with tryharder. So many of these "he's cheating on you, LTB" threads with no evidence whatsoever.

nozzz Sat 18-Jul-15 18:56:41

As others have said, a blackberry charger can be used to charged many other devices.

Why don't you just ask your husband what it was for?

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