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Need to finish a relationship and it's breaking my heart

(8 Posts)
sorenoggin Tue 23-Jun-15 12:45:47

I been seeing a guy once a week for last 2 years. It started out as casual fun and inevitably feelings have become involved and I have fallen for him big time.

I am a very sexual person, I have slept with a lot of men and women as well as long term relationships and sexually I feel this man is my soul mate. .He blows my mind and I feel utterly connected to him and I know he feels the same.

The problem lies in that he said he has so much going on in his life with work and family stuff that he sometimes feels pressured that he has to find time to see me. He says he loves being with me but does sometimes feel like 'having' to text me and see me stresses him out because it's meant to be just fun. I should add he has also in the past told me he loves me, wishes he could see me more - so you can see there are some major mixed signals going on.

It's breaking my heart that he feels I am just an extra pressure. I have an utterly stressful busy life too but I see him as an escape. ..never ever a chore.

I need to finish it don't I? But the thought of never kissing him again is just killing me.

I don't know why I am posting. .guess I just needed to write it down sad

givemehopehelpmecope Tue 23-Jun-15 13:11:56

Hi - i did that exact thing 2 weeks ago. Ie finished a relationship with someone i thought i loved. He had a lot of pressure in his life & gradually withdrew from the relationship. Me being me chose to ignore ALL the signs (being late, lack of sex, only interested in himself & his problems etcetc) & ended up with him losing it with me not once, not twice but three times. I was scared. I knew i had to finish it at that moment. It really, really, really hurts. And i miss the ILLUSION of what i thought we had. I think about him all the time, but haven't cried today ;). And i HAD to put myself first. Try baggagereclaim.co.uk - it's a godsend! Do the right thing. Good luck.

sorenoggin Tue 23-Jun-15 15:58:23

Thanks for responding and understanding. .its horrible feeling. .I feel like I could easily persuade him and me to carry on but it makes you feel a bit shit knowing their heart isn't in it.
Your post has helped give me bit of strength to follow my head

givemehopehelpmecope Tue 23-Jun-15 17:55:58

I'm glad I've helped! Just accept that it WILL hurt for a while, but know that it WILL get better. Honestly the baggage reclaim website has become my security blanket over the past two weeks: full of fantastic advice & every time i feel i want to contact him i read one of the posts! Good luck xxx

BitOutOfPractice Tue 23-Jun-15 18:58:52

Oh sore that does sound painful. I feel for you. I ended it with my ex even though I loved him with all my heart. It was the hardest and most painful thing I have ever done but it was the right thing to do and, looking back, I am glad I did

Wishing you strength and determination thanks

cleanmyhouse Tue 23-Jun-15 19:30:51

I've finished with someone under similar circumstances, it broke my heart. But who wants to feel like pressure or a chore?

sorenoggin Tue 23-Jun-15 23:21:13

Yep that's what I keep telling myself. .I am worth more than being a chore to someone.
I do think he cares but not enough

Wotsitsareafterme Thu 25-Jun-15 20:23:51

I finished with someone for the same reasons. It was a relief in the end and didn't hurt me as bad as I thought it would.
At least you can reflect and say you know what I didn't destroy that relationship it was them.they couldn't be arsed and I don't want anything like that hmm

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