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AIBU?

(6 Posts)
Weathergames Sun 07-Jun-15 19:20:31

Two years ago OH was away at sea for 3 months I went on hen do and had a one night stand.

I admitted this to OH some months later and he forgave me (so he said).

Unbeknown to me he went straight onto a load of dating sites and in revenge had several affairs (he was living away from me) and left me on my birthday and refused to contact me for a month. It then came out that he had practically moved in with one of the women, spent our savings on a car for her and told her a load of lies and had been sleeping with us both giving me an STI (nice) trying to be honest so not to drop feed.

It turned out he'd been phoning her from the loo in my house and all the usual affair lies.

We have been back together for a year and we are doing ok and are having counselling together.

He's obessed with this game on his phone which has a chat feature.

Have found a load of emails between him and this woman in America he plays the game with. There is nothing sinister it is just chat, she is married with 3 kids he has chatted about me (which I feel v hmm about).

I am really really pissed off about it though I have confronted him and he says it no different to me being FB a friends with ex's (I am from my teens but I never "chat" privately with them). The Internet connection is taking me back to last year and everything that happened and I am upset he hasn't mentioned that he has been talking to this woman a lot.

He says its just friendship and she's in America blah blah but I am really hurt and upset. He has said he'll delete the app - I said I am just not comfortable him talking to a woman online who he doesn't know ESP about stuff to do with me and our kids.

He still works away and has very few friends where he is but wft is he doing striking up a friendship with this women online?

Am I out of order in not liking this?

LIZS Sun 07-Jun-15 19:23:40

Neither of you seem happy, trusting or committed to the relationship. Are you sure there is really any future in it ?

VixxFace Sun 07-Jun-15 19:23:45

You have both cheated. You will never feel comfortable or secure again. The trust is gone. Even if it's something innocent there will always be that doubt

VixxFace Sun 07-Jun-15 19:25:38

because you know what you're both capable of.

Weathergames Sun 07-Jun-15 19:27:08

I am happy, I do want to be with him - I was beginning to really stop stressing about it the past few months and felt that the trust was really beginning to be quite solid again.

I don't know if I should say yes I do want his to cease all contact with her.

LIZS Sun 07-Jun-15 19:52:45

Surely being suspicious and questioning his fidelity cannot make you happy hmm

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