My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

'friend' problems

37 replies

starodyssey2015 · 26/05/2015 13:52

I've been friends with this girl for years. And in the past few years we've strayed apart, she makes no effort and I've kind of accepted the friendship is over. I'd of liked to have kept her on Facebook if she ever fancies rekindling the relationship.

However, I feel bullied by her friends. Everytime I like or comment on something on her Facebook someone makes a nasty comment at me, someone even called me desperate the other day because I asked if she was in our area. I honestly have no idea what I've done to deserve this. In fact just now she was 'fraped' and they commented on my Facebook status calling me names. She deleted it and I said whoever did that is a nob and she called me rude. Like for gods sake I think it's justified when I've never ever done anything to them. Some of them I haven't even met! Her boyfriend was my childhood best friend and even he's started doing it!

Im a grown woman with a husband and a child and I am being bullied! I'm getting really annoyed and upset by this and it's just got to the point where I want them all out of my life for good but I don't want to cause a feud incase I see her about.

Should I say something to her?

OP posts:
Report
MadAsgardian · 26/05/2015 13:54

I think you should just disengage. She doesn't sound like much of a friend.

Report
tasha24x · 26/05/2015 13:55

Block & Delete Her. Out of sight, out of mind. Dont give her the satisfaction of rising to it. Xx

Report
S0mmer · 26/05/2015 13:56

Wow. I would just leave it there. Even if for whatever reason she is content with your friendship having been relegated, she must be embarrassed of her friends' behaviour. And if she's not, she should be. I wouldn't say anything. I would hide her posts. Don't like or comment on her posts. That way, unless she extends an olive branch or a comment, you won't think of her. The next move, if there is one, should be hers.

Report
starodyssey2015 · 26/05/2015 14:05

Leah, I'm going to delete you off facebook. Not because I don't like you or anything but I feel I can't have a conversation with you without your friends making a comment. Not entirely sure what I've done to them but either way it's frustrating when all I do is try to see you and I just get abuse. I've pretty much grown out of it now and I think it's childish. I have work friends on Facebook and I don't really want them seeing all this crap. It's starting to annoy me and I'm just trying to cut the negativity out. If you ever want to talk about anything or see me and Max here's my number -

I've written this. Should I even bother sending it?

OP posts:
Report
AlternativeTentacles · 26/05/2015 14:11

Just block her and delete. Who cares if she sees you out and about?

Report
SoleSource · 26/05/2015 14:12

Yeah, send it. Then hide her posts. What were her friends saying about you.

Report
starodyssey2015 · 26/05/2015 14:25

Well I put up that I was sick on facebook and what can I use to stop me feeling sick. And then one of my friends joked around saying 'you're not pregnant again are you' and we were joking about it

Then one of her friends posted on the status saying I looked it. Which is really upsetting because I'm still in the process of losing my baby weight and I'm a size 12. But it really hurt my feelings

OP posts:
Report
AndTheBandPlayedOn · 26/05/2015 14:26

No, silence is more dignified after she has already ended it (from your OP). As you have experienced, any contact will only result in negative responses (why offer them more entertainment at your expense?). Sorry, but you have had enough clues here to just walk away. You don't need to have the last word.

Did you mean to use a real life name in your post? You might want to get MNHQ to edit it for you (by reporting your own post?).

Report
FlabulousChix · 26/05/2015 14:28

Is send it. Then delete and block not nice at all

Report
AndTheBandPlayedOn · 26/05/2015 14:29

X-post, star. See? You need to block them, or even better, perhaps step away from fb entirely.

Report
Smooshface · 26/05/2015 14:29

Her friends sound like jerks, and children. I would make your posts friends only and unfriend any if them. Just stay friends with your friend if you want to, unfollow here if you want to stop notifications.

Report
starodyssey2015 · 26/05/2015 14:31

Yeah I didn't think about that when I pasted it. It's her real name but she doesn't spell it like that (no clue why don't ask me). She wouldn't go on this and my real names not on here.

OP posts:
Report
starodyssey2015 · 26/05/2015 14:33

Thanks for your advice everybody x

OP posts:
Report
logicalfallacy101 · 26/05/2015 14:59

Star.... don't send it. Silence says it all. Maybe my advice is wrong, and the silence might just be beyond her underatanding. You know her best. Trust your gut.

Report
Hissy · 26/05/2015 14:59

why don't you set your audience to Friends Only - and block all of the offending 'friends'?

Report
logicalfallacy101 · 26/05/2015 15:00

Understanding duh!!

Report
Fudgeface123 · 26/05/2015 15:07

You've accepted the friendship is over so why are you still liking her stuff on Facebook, she's obviously not interested. I'm sorry but your message comes across as a bit desperate, she's already zoned you out and will probably laugh with her friends about your message.

Report
VanitasVanitatum · 26/05/2015 15:55

Oh god no don't send that and please don't give her your number!! She is not a nice person and she may let her friends continue to bully you if they have your number. Just block and delete, you do not need that negativity in your life.

Report
starodyssey2015 · 26/05/2015 16:00

I don't 'like' her things on facebook?

OP posts:
Report
cuntycowfacemonkey · 26/05/2015 16:00

For goodness sakes delete her from facebook and then sort out your privacy settings so the others can't see your posts or comment

Report
BeeHappyAndSmile · 26/05/2015 16:01

I'd keep her as your FB 'friend' but block her friends that sound totally pathetic.

Report
starodyssey2015 · 26/05/2015 16:01

And it would be on private message. I wouldn't put it on her fb for her mean friends to see!

OP posts:
Report

Don’t want to miss threads like this?

Weekly

Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!

Log in to update your newsletter preferences.

You've subscribed!

starodyssey2015 · 26/05/2015 16:06

I deleted her friends, it's if I ever go on her Facebook (which I avoid nowadays). My Facebook is private but for some weird reason they go onto hers and put nasty things. She doesn't apologise though. Think it would be best just to call it a day.

OP posts:
Report
tomanyanimals · 26/05/2015 16:06

Don't send it she is ok with them being nasty and hasn't been exactly polite herself why come over as though treating you like that is ok but her friends can't just delete them and forgot if she really wanted to get in contact with you she would find a way that's what true friends do

Report
Fudgeface123 · 26/05/2015 16:07

You said in your op Everytime I like or comment on something on her Facebook someone makes a nasty comment

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.