I have got into a spiral of feeling insecure and not feeling like my DP will stick around. We've been together for 3 years. He is a lot more relaxed than me, and I've noticed (not through game-playing but just naturally), that when I am busier, he is much more attentive. Even down to smaller things like more texts, more loving texts etc. I feel as if the more I have fallen in love with him, the more he neglects the relationship. Don't get me wrong, he is caring and when I am not in my 'insecure' phase, things are really good between us. I have begun more and more to measure my own worth on his feelings towards me - hence why I am always so keen to 'check' he still loves and wants me. In reality, though, I know this makes me less attractive. I do have many friends and I do have hobbies (dance class once a week and swimming instructor after work some nights). I also meet up with friends regularly and go on trips with them. He seemed to want my attention much much more at the start of the relationship (I know this is natural in some ways).
Has anyone else ever been through this? I know the usual things to say are get a hobby, see friends more etc etc but I feel that I have all that and do those things. I just want to know if my DP's actions do really mean that he's not that bothered (ie he is bothered only when I am aloof), or whether this is totally natural for someone to become distant/more attentive depending on how you act, even if they really love you.
Thanks.
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Relationships
Has anyone else felt like this? Do you think it is you or your DP who is messing up...
tuesdaydays1 · 03/03/2015 10:36
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