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Relationships

Are separation and divorce possible without a solicitor?

14 replies

farendofafart · 27/01/2015 21:52

Just considering my options. Already separated but wanting to take things a step further.

We have 2 children who live with me. Stbxh has access to them but there is no formal arrangement as yet.

We have a joint mortgage. He is living in the house, I am renting elsewhere.

We are relatively amicable.

Any experience or advice welcome.

OP posts:
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EnglishGirlApproximately · 27/01/2015 21:56

Hi OP. I got divorced without any legal advice but I must stress I would only advise it if you have a good relationship with your ex and are very open with each other. We sold the house and completely separated finances before even considering divorce so it was very straightforward. I wouldn't even consider it if there were any financial or visitation issues to be resolved. Good luck.

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getthefeckouttahere · 27/01/2015 22:00

Oh i should imagine its pretty easy and straightforward.

But then i also imagine that it also very easy to get ripped off/ do it badly/ leave loose ends that could come back and bite you on the arse.

Legally speaking this is one of the greatest events of your life, to undertake it without any legal advice, even if that is just checking that what you have arranged is about right, seems like madness to me.

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KouignAmann · 27/01/2015 22:05

Try the Gov.uk website it explains it all and has the forms to download. My DP used it for his divorce and did it all for £343

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iggymama · 27/01/2015 23:08

I did it all myself, but we were amicable and had sorted the money side out. All went through smoothly in only a month.

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textfan · 27/01/2015 23:40

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

farendofafart · 28/01/2015 08:04

Textfan, no I'm not paying my half of the mortgage. H wants to stay in the house for now. I said he could and that if we sell it some years down the line, I will only take half the equity of the time I lived there.

OP posts:
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CogitoErgoSometimes · 28/01/2015 08:50

That all sounds very vague. 'Some years down the line' means what? Who gets what at the end of it? Easy to say these things now while everything's reasonably amicable but what if you fall out or someone changes their mind? I've seen quite a few 'amicable' divorces turn sour when a new partner comes on the scene and isn't quite so happy with the generous offer made to the ex.....

Do get legal advice

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JohnFarleysRuskin · 28/01/2015 08:53

I was going to say, yes, we did - but we didn't have a property.

Where's there's a mortgage, I would say get some advice.

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avocadotoast · 28/01/2015 08:53

Given that there's a house involved, I'd get legal advice. I've seen a few people I've dealt with at work get bitten by divorces where they've just made verbal agreements.

How old are your kids? Would there ever be any issues with maintenance etc if things became less than amicable?

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LetticeKnollys · 28/01/2015 09:04

My OH and his ex did (1 DC), it was fine since they had an amicable relationship. She did insist on having mediation though, he said he didn't think they needed it but I can understand why she wanted it to iron out the details.

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MirandaWest · 28/01/2015 09:11

XH and I divorced without using a solicitor (although I did have a couple of free half hours with different ones) but we didn't have a house to sell and minimal assets.

You could do the actual divorce part without a solicitor and then the financial parts using one. But with a house to work out I would use a solicitor.

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nauticant · 28/01/2015 15:01

I will only take half the equity of the time I lived there.

How will you establish what this amount was? Even if 10 years down this line you produce an email from him where he states an amount, will that be binding when he says "taking everything into account, there actually was no equity."?

And that's just the house.

At the very least you need legal advice to work out what is reasonable for you to get and how to arrange things so you get it.

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Plarail123 · 28/01/2015 15:29

I did it and we had a house, it was sold and equity split. There were no children involved and I think that makes a huge difference. Amicable now may not last. You need a solicitor I'm afraid.

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textfan · 29/01/2015 00:53

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Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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