Usurped by Gran

[Usurped]

My mother has been living with us for 6 weeks now and I´m thoroughly put out. She spends all her time playing with DD to the extent that DD doen´t even need me here anymore. DD runs to Gran when we pick up from playyschool and doesn´t approach me anymore on her own initiative. My role is now chief chef, cleaner etc but not more than that. I´m thoroughly put out. What can I do? BTW, my mother is not able to do much in the house to help, that´s why she´s living with us now. So all of her time can be devoted to DD. What can I do? So fed up..

[KBear]

Well you could thank your lucky stars you have someone your dd loves so much sharing her life for a start - that might put a positive spin on your put-out feelings! I can understand them but you know yourself if your mum is going to continue living with you you need to deal with them.

Why not factor in a couple of hours every week where you and dd do something fun - like bike ride to the park or swimming - where your mum can't join in and you get her all to yourself?

[Usurped]

It goes without saying that I am pleased they have such a good relationship. Wouldn´t you be put out if your DD (aged 2 BTW) started to ignore you?

[KBear]

Yes I would, I said that in my post. I always made a suggestion for things to improve it and to make yourself feel better - didn't intend to offend you. Sorry if I did. I'll get my coat.

[KBear]

also not always!

[Usurped]

Not offended at all, thanks for your suggestion...

[wakeupandsmellthecoffee]

I would be really upset and jelouse (cant spell sorry ) But as suggested I would try and get some alone time with your child especially bed time story reading and meeting friends for lunch so your mum cant come just once a week type thing . Hope it all works out . At least its your mum .

[wartywarthog]

i would be upset too. great that she can help and she's got such a good relationship of course, but you are her mum! i'd make sure i got a bit of time with her every day, and every few days take her somewhere on my own. i'd also have a word with your mum and say you're a bit upset about it. will be good if she knows and understands the situation.