My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

Just a bit of a moan (and a small cry)

54 replies

Lula2515 · 22/10/2014 00:07

I'm 38 weeks pregnant, tired and hormonal so I probably am massively overreacting.

DP has gone out for drinks with girls he used to work with.
He text at 10:30 to say he was just waiting for a taxi. Still hasn't left. He always does this.

I guess maybe I'm just being jealous that I can't go out too, but I feel really sad about the whole thing and annoyed that he hasn't managed my expectations more than anything.

Sorry, not massively looking for advice I guess, just needed to type it out!

OP posts:
gamerchick · 22/10/2014 00:09

No that would irritate me pregnant or not.

Why lie?

Lula2515 · 22/10/2014 00:11

I don't know, I can understand when you've had a few drinks that things just get carried away but I've talked to him so many times about managing my expectations...if he'd said "I'll be home at 2" and came in at 1 then I'd be pleased, but obviously telling me he's leaving at 10:30 then coming in at 1 I'm just annoyed.

OP posts:
SweetErmengarde · 22/10/2014 00:28

I would be fuming too.

There is no reason to lie to you; you aren't his mother or his jailer and behaving as if you were is just plain insulting.

In your position, I'd be locking the door, leaving the key in on the inside and going to sleep....and I'm not even pregnant!

Lula2515 · 22/10/2014 00:29

Thank you. I wish I felt that cross and strong, instead I'm just sobbing like a lunatic!

OP posts:
UmmAbdillah · 22/10/2014 00:33

Agree with above: not even pregnant and I'd be fuming! No need for lies Angry particularly dodge when he's out for drinks with girls whilst your stuck at home.

UmmAbdillah · 22/10/2014 00:36

Aww.. Sorry you're feeling so upset. From experience, when things ever got me to that state during pregnancy, there's usually no point fighting the tears... Once they're out, hopefully redirect your energy into teaching him a lesson Wink

Lula2515 · 22/10/2014 00:36

Yeah...they're all very young and pretty and fawn over him because he's fun and flashes the cash (which we don't have). And I'm at home making sure there's petrol in the car for his business trip tomorrow and that his suit and shirt are ready to go.
Feel bloody hard done by, sorry for myself and a bit lonely if I'm totally honest and a bit over dramatic

OP posts:
Lula2515 · 22/10/2014 00:41

So he was allegedly getting a cab home with one of the girls who lives opposite us..... I heard a car as I went to get a drink, saw her get out and expected to see him too. He's not there.

OP posts:
LineRunner · 22/10/2014 00:42

Have you phoned him?

Lula2515 · 22/10/2014 00:44

I text him. He's ignoring it I think.

OP posts:
ChillingGrinBloodLover · 22/10/2014 00:47

I had an Ex that would do that, it drove me batshit. I may have shouted said more than once 'I don't give a fuck care what time you are coming in but don't fucking tell me 'early' or about '11' then not fucking come home until 3am. I suffer from insomnia and sleep lightly, I plan my sleep around things like this or I'd get no sleep. So to say one thing and do the other would generally mean I'd get no sleep that night.... sooooooo annoying.

I would be doubly pissed off that she's home and he's not in the same taxi. Livid.

I'll dig the patio for you... x

53Dragon · 22/10/2014 00:47

Text him and tell him you're going to bed - don't wake you up - sleep on the sofa/spare room/garden depending how cross you are Smile
Joking apart, your baby could come any time - he shouldn't even be out getting pissed in the first place. Arsehole.

Lula2515 · 22/10/2014 00:47

Just called and he ignored that too.

Am I just massively overreacting to this? He barely goes out anymore, maybe I should leave him alone?

OP posts:
53Dragon · 22/10/2014 00:49

You are 38 weeks pregnant with his child - you could go into labour at any time. He can go out but he stays in phone contact and doesn't drink. That would be what a reasonable man would do.

Lula2515 · 22/10/2014 00:49

chilling thanks, that momentarily stopped the tears.

I did mention that he probably shouldn't get ratarsed in case the baby decided to come early...

OP posts:
UmmAbdillah · 22/10/2014 00:49

He sounds totally disrespectful tbh.

You're in the final stages of pregnancy, vulnerable and at a time when (I'm sorry if this makes me sound like a diva) it should be all about your needs not his. I mean, for all he knows you could go into labour at any time and you need him to be accessible and not drunk. Aside from that, I get that he prob wants to make the most of catching up with friends before baby comes... But now it should be yours and his time together. Why does he need to be out so late tonight when you're alone? Main issues are the lies tho

LineRunner · 22/10/2014 00:52

Go to bed. Text him to say don't wake you up and tomorrow ask him not to do it again.

But it's your threshold.

If you go into labour tonight just call an ambulance. Don't try to find him if he won't answer the hone. And don't bugger about on MN.

UmmAbdillah · 22/10/2014 00:54

What the... He said he's CHILLING???

UmmAbdillah · 22/10/2014 00:57

Ohhh haha you're responding to someone with that name. Oops.

Lula2515 · 22/10/2014 00:58

Haha no, I was replying to pp...'chillinggrinbloodlover'!

Don't be silly, he's said nothing, he's ignoring me!

OP posts:
LineRunner · 22/10/2014 00:58

No. The OP was replying to a poster called Chilling.

Lula2515 · 22/10/2014 00:59

I've put the spare duvet on the sofa, washed my face and got into bed...won't sleep til he gets in but will pretend I am.

Thanks for the hand holding xxxx

OP posts:

Don’t want to miss threads like this?

Weekly

Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!

Log in to update your newsletter preferences.

You've subscribed!

Satinlaces · 22/10/2014 01:00

From your previous threads he sounds like a bit of a dick.

Have things been any better recently, Lula?

UmmAbdillah · 22/10/2014 01:00

Grin yeah sorry about that... I was on verge of sorting out a babysitter so that I could come and help with the patio!!

Lula2515 · 22/10/2014 01:03

Haha if only we did have a patio..

Yeah, my previous threads.... Considered nc so there wasn't any judgement but i was too sad and didn't want to be accused of being a fake after all the recent stuff on MN! Yeah he has been a proper dick in the past. After last post about him I packed my bags and was about to leave before be came home and stopped me. Things have been pretty good for a couple of months, this is the only thing to have happened to ruin my bliss....which is why I thought I'd perhaps overreacted.

OP posts:
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.