How much time do you spend with your dh during the week if you both work & have small dc?

[Jemster]

I feel as though I hardly ever see or speak to dh anymore. He works f/t, me p/t & then looking after dc 6 & 2 so we're both really tired in the evenings. He plays sport one night a week and there always seems to be something sporty on the tv he wants to watch. Even if not, the evenings just seem to pass us by with clearing up etc.

Part of me feels like I'm a bit lonely and miss how things to used to be but another part is so exhausted I'm just not that bothered.

Is this kind of normal? I just wonder if things will ever be different as I don't feel like I'm very close to him at all now whereas we used to be inseperable.
Thanks

[AdmitYouKnowImRight]

What did you do before children?

[workingtitle]

I still feel connected with DH even through we have a one year old and I'm back at work 4 days/wk (he's ft). We tend to hang out together and have a G&T while one of us is cooking supper and we talk a lot then. We don't watch tv til after dinner, at which point it's staring blankly at the tv for an hour before collapsing into bed... Non tv time is essential I think. We also are both home to share cooking and baby's bedtime, which helps things, but lots of people don't have that luxury.
I think it does take huge effort when you're tired and have children, but that hour with DH after DS is in bed with a drink, cooking and eating is really good for us. It sounds like you want things to change?

[fairylightsintheloft]

we work at the same place so have a 45 min drive each way to chat which helps a lot, though we don;t see each other during the day. In the 90 mins or so that we're home before the kids go to bed (5 and 3) we divide up chores, cooking, sorting washing etc trying to do as much s poss while still being with the kids so once they're in bed we have about two hours. Most nights its TV but stuff we agree on to watch together so we don;t just sit in silence through it. Sometimes I'll disappear into a bath and he'll play a computer game but we feel fine with that.

[CaptainFracasse]

I think yes it's pretty normal but at the same time he needs to remember that he can't just do the same things than before ie he needs to prioritise his relationship and talking to you/spending time with you to watch a sport stuff on TV that he could watch on replay at a later date.
On the other side, do you actually want to spend more to e together or are you tired for that?
Or are you worried about the way your relationship goes and wonders if you need to nurture it a bit more?

[cheminotte]

Prob about 2 hours most nights. I do yoga once a week so less then but other nights we eat together after dc are in bed (about 7.30) then clear up together, then sit on sofa reading books or on the internet. We don't watch tv at all. We rent a film most weekends but our evenings feel longer as we eat with the dc at about 5.30.