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Relationships

Anyone tried POF or any other websites? Are they any good?

13 replies

HannerHet · 13/09/2014 17:55

Hi just wondering if anyone has used online dating sites to meet anyone? Have split up with exdp since before Xmas last year and don't get out much as I work and have the children 95% of the time. Which ones are the best and any I should avoid? Any advice would be appreciated. It's been more than 10 years since I went on a date (I'm 38) so feel a bit rusty to say the least!

OP posts:
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RollerCola · 13/09/2014 22:22

I went on pof last year after separating with my husband (I was 39)

There seem to be a LOT of people on there, presumably because it's a free app. I was bombarded by messages within the first week, many just one-liners 'hey wanna chat?' Etc

I was a bit overwhelmed to be honest, and only responded to about 3 out of around 50. Most just didn't look particularly nice, many couldn't string a sentence together. Some clearly just wanted a shag, others obviously sent the same standard message to every woman they could find. Many wanted my mobile number straight away which I didn't want to give out.

Anyway, in the middle of all this was a guy who was polite, funny, didn't mention sex, liked music & films (as I do) and looked nice. He didn't pressure me for my mobile number, we just chatted online and seemed to get on well.

I was very wary about it all, and to be honest if I hadn't met this guy I would have deleted the app quite quickly as it was all a bit much. But I did meet him and a year later we're still together & it's going great.

My advice is to decide what you're looking for and sift out the ones you don't like straight away. Pof is good for volumes, but you do need to reject a lot before you find a goodun.

Good luck!

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crazylady321 · 13/09/2014 22:30

Yes think they are a good way of getting back into the dating scene, I know they helped me find a bit of confidence. You have to work your wat throught the obvious pervs and obvious odd bodds but Ive met about 4 or 5 guys who have seemed really nice nothing ever came relationship wise but we had a few good dates and im intouch with a couple of them as friends on fb we occasionaly chat.

Just be very careful not to give out too much personal info

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CalamityClara · 13/09/2014 22:31

I used the guardians dating site.

Met my soul mate. Only been a year together but I know he's the one.

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Tigerbear · 13/09/2014 22:41

I've used the Guardian site too, on two occasions (was in a very similar situation to you OP, having recently split up with H who I was with 10 years). I've had two relationships from it, and approx 12 dates with different men. The ones on the Guardian all seem to be a certain type (as you might expect, it being the Guardian) - arty, creative, work mainly freelance in marketing or advertising or similar, very well travelled, well read, etc

I checked out POF the other day, just out of interest, and was quite horrified. Most of the men looked awful, text speak seems the norm, with lines such as 'U wanna join me for fun?' One charmer states that he's looking for a 'good old fashioned affair', whilst also stating that he lives with his girlfriend. Same guy has an almost frontal nude shot (he's actually very good looking, but that's besides the point Grin )

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UrsulaBuffay · 13/09/2014 22:44

Join us on the Dating Thread- we've seen it all!

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Cannotbelieveit · 13/09/2014 22:45

Met my husband on pof in feb 2012. Yes there were lots of chancers after one thing on there but there are some decent guys too!

We have been married 18 months and have two DC aged 17 months and 4 months.

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sleepingbetternow82 · 13/09/2014 22:50

Okcupid is my favourite for intelligent men - it's free and it's good. But I'm also on match and pof. The more you're on the more choice you have!

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youmakemydreams · 13/09/2014 23:04

I used POF was an accident really followed a link to a corkers profile and started having a nosey around local men.
There were loads just looking for a shag not sure how that compares to other dating sites. I was looking for dating and company not really a serious relationship but more than a fuck buddy.
I went on a few dates had some ok times and some crappy times and started shafting to a guy whose profile I liked. We got on well and exchanged numbers texted for a bit and then met up for a date. We got on brilliantly, had mutual friends at uni and he went out with a girl I was friends with at school.
He never wanted to get married again and I never wanted to live together again. We both failed he lives here and we are getting married this time next year.

I never went looking for it. And lacked a lot of confidence after having my heart broken so it was a great way to get back on the dating scene. I looked at it as a way to expand my social circle and meet people I wouldn't normally.

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HannerHet · 14/09/2014 19:31

Thanks all! Will check out the dating thread too. Where do I find it?

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LittleDonkeyKong · 14/09/2014 21:46

I met my STBXH on POF. I joined again January this year started talking to a guy then dated him for 2 months but he was a twat! Went back on a month ago and saw a guy on there who I am FB friends with. I knew he had separated from his wife but didn't know he was dating again. We went on a lunch date 2 weeks ago then he went on holiday the day after lol. He got back yesterday and he is coming to mine one evening this week to watch a movie (I have 2 DC's 3 and 1). I lived across the road from this guy for 16 years from 0-16 and went to primary and secondary school with him lol.

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stubbornstains · 14/09/2014 21:54

I went on a few dates had some ok times and some crappy times and started shafting to a guy whose profile I liked

Best. Typo. Ever. Grin

I met DP on OKCupid. It has the reputation of being a little classier than PoF, but on the other hand look ^ what I missed out on!

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Writerwannabe83 · 14/09/2014 22:00

I met my DH on POF - he was the second guy I had met off that site. I had previously been a member of match.com and had dated one guy from there.

There are dodgy guys on the sites but there will be amazing ones too Smile

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PhallicGiraffe · 14/09/2014 22:03

I've found PoF to be quite good for a free site. Just remember to set your filters on, be pro-active in making first contact with men you're interested in, and make good use of the block function.

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