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A ladies point of view please im sorry its so long

(187 Posts)

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bigbear38 Wed 09-Jul-14 16:54:32

I have been with my partner for 8 years now. We have 1 son. She moved in with me pretty much straight away. I have always been very sucessful and ran my own business own my own house and have a savi business head. She has never really had any great jobs that really brought in much money. When my son was born she wanted to go back to work part time and put my son in nursery but with the nursery fees she would be hardly earing much more money so i told her she should stay at home and help me with my bills and paperwork and i would giveher some money to help her pay for the bills but she wanted to go back as she wanted her own freedom and her own money so she went back to work. We agreed that when she isnt at work she would spent the other days dedicated to doing my company work but everytime i got home hardly anything had been done. She would make an excuse up saying that she had to clean the house or take car of the baby Or that i hadnt given her a list of what to do but anyone with half a brain would know to look on the computer and go through the accounts, do a bit of research but with her always a reason why not to do something.It would really annoy me because i would fall behind with sending out my bills and so therefore in turn i wouldnt get paid. She cant understand that its important to get this stuff done because its our family business, although she does pay all the utility bills, i still pay for the mortgage, repairs on the house and any little treats at the weekend plus buying the nice things for the house. She gets really angry when i call her up on it and says i shouldnt be pressurising her and making her feel inadiquate when i dont share my chores with the baby but at the end of the day i am working a manual job and running around all day (mostly after everyone else) she is just sat at a desk all day when shes at work. She also really annoys me because her idea of cleaning up is throwing everything into a cupboard instead of clenaing it properly. I told her the other day that she should do one of her super cleans in the kitchen bcasue it gets grubby from the toddler but she just find any excuse not to do it. Some days i get up to go to work only to find there are no clean work clothes what does she do all day?????? We had a huge row last week because i got home from a really busy day and she had made me soup i was so pissed off!! Had i have known she had made me soup i had got myself some lunch. I was starving and had to then go out to a shop and buy junk food. Another thing that really gets my goat about this person is she just isnt like a real women she isnt bothered about nice soft furnishings for the house like pictures and nice cushions etc if i call her upon it she says she cant afford it after paying the bills and the 2 sofas that she pays for but yet she can go out and buy coffee with friends. Other women make such an effort with their house and make sure that it well presented but its like shes just not bothered she would rather bury her head in the sand like a moron. I feel like she isnt being a partner towards me and that she is just taking and not putting in. I feel that she is not making any contribution or effort towards our home. I looked after my son the other afternoon for a couple of hours but was pissed off to find there was not any baby food for him. She said it was because he no longer has jars and she cooks him pasta or fresh food but to be honest i just thought it was an excuse because of her laziness. In the morning when she gets up and gets him ready for nursery she gets him ready on the bed where im sleeping its so annoying and disrespectful. I think she would rather lay in bed all day festering than do anything productive. She says im abusive towards her but im just telling her for her own good because she comes from a diferent back ground than me. She has come from a background where having a nice house and nice things isnt important hence the reasons of why i think she is lazy when it comes to the upkeep of the house.Can anybody offer me any advice as to what to do with this person or any similar experiences? i feel that i am gouing round in circles with her. She is ruining our family. Do i just cut my losses and find someone who can step up and be a women and appreciate the things she has????? Thank you in advance

JollyGolightly Wed 09-Jul-14 17:09:48

Are you the guy with the massive cock from earlier?

Is the business head as big as his enormous bell end?

Small jaw and lack of cushion care.
<shakes head>

QuintessentiallyQS Wed 09-Jul-14 17:10:00

Sadly, there is no cure for Cuntitis, but at least, it is not contagious!

MiniTheMinx Wed 09-Jul-14 17:10:50

"This woman" "This Person" you really don't like this "person" do you.

Pobblewhohasnotoes Wed 09-Jul-14 17:11:21

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MissFruits Wed 09-Jul-14 17:12:56

Uh oh, I think my dp may actually be a real woman as he buys all the soft furnishings and is always arranging the cushions to look just so!

greenhill Wed 09-Jul-14 17:13:08

'Rather bury her hand in the sand like a moron', could you possibly mean ostrich?

My advice: you need a secretary to help you with your spelling, punctuation and grammar; for your awful attitude you need other types of professional help.

forumdonkey Wed 09-Jul-14 17:13:27

OP she hasn't time for the housework or the washing or soft furnishings buying or your accounts cause while you are running your empire she's shagging your mate with the bigger dick and thats why she's sore wink

If you are worried about your soft furnishings Op, try one of these bad boys.

Kleptronic Wed 09-Jul-14 17:15:50

I need new cushions. I hate cushions though. <helpful>

Kleptronic I can recommend a good website. Nice, neutral abusive cushions for all.

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TondelayoSchwarzkopf Wed 09-Jul-14 17:22:17

I like the Modern Family episode where Jay and Gloria argue about the number of cushions on the bed.

But of course, unlike the OP, they are fictional.

I'd love to reply properly but I'm busy arranging my cushions just so

Jolly, yes.

Stick 'Dachsmeister' ('I've got a big knob' troll NN) through the MN search engine at the top of the page.

Observe what emerges. The deleted massive shaft convo aaaaand - one other conversation, in Feminism, about women becoming childcarers at the expense of their earnings.

Research, I expect.

Apologies to MN for breaking the rules, but I'm a little bored with this guff now

ChangelingToday Wed 09-Jul-14 17:27:17

It was reference to your partner as 'this person' that annoyed me. You clearly don't see her as your partner or equal but as some sort of servant and housekeeper. That attitude must be depressing for her to have to put up with everyday, no wonder she doesn't want to do anything when you show such obvious resentment for her!

ApproachingATunnel Wed 09-Jul-14 17:28:03

I have gotten through the half of OP and my advice is this: fuck this shit, she needs to get away from you, poor woman!

pilates Wed 09-Jul-14 17:28:49

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TSSDNCOP Wed 09-Jul-14 17:29:16

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WellWhoKnew Wed 09-Jul-14 17:32:30

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MummyKnight Wed 09-Jul-14 17:34:25

This can't be serious surely! If it is I'm amazed your partner has stayed with you as long as she has. I think she should go out for the whole day and leave you behind with your son and let's see if you can accomplish any of the things you expect her to do in a day.

Massive round of applause for your partner for putting up with your shit for so long!

BitOutOfPractice Wed 09-Jul-14 17:37:06

If I were your wife I would buy a cushion. And I know what I'd be tempted to do with it as well

Ooh, I could really go for a bit of soup.

I'm willing to risk dh leaving me over it. He's not a troll twunt you see.

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