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Twat walked out again tonight

(272 Posts)
dingdongdoodlebug Sat 10-May-14 21:46:12

My goodness me I sometime hate myself for how much i am unable to break free from this fucker.

I spent around 2 hours in the kitchen tonight making his favourite 3 course meal.... when attempting to fire off the creme brulee i burnt them. I was upset cause the rest of the meal was just lovely.. so i said the f word a few times in front my MY 12 year old DS (not his). DS giggled. But fuckhead said it was inappropriate (this tosser is always swearing thought not the f word...). I said oh fuckityfuckwits i am really upset i burnt this.

So he then stuffed the said creme brulee down his greedy neck and walked out. He doesn't live with us [thank the lord] but what a rude ignorant twat he is

Sorry. I am bloody so annoyed and sick to death of his pathetic excuses for walking out. He is a 51 year old man ffs

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhh

well you know the answer---don't let him walk back in..EVER.

Greedy fucker !!

BettyBotter Sat 10-May-14 21:49:04

And you let this fuckwit into your and your son's life because?

He was so upset that he had to eat his cream brulee, THEN go?

dingdongdoodlebug Sat 10-May-14 21:58:00

i know, i know, i know

i am ashamed and hate myself for being entwined in these complete and utter fuckwit... i have just lost my job because of something he has done to me

but i suffer with depression and when we split up i fall apart. i am on meds, see gp regularly, and have just re-referred myself for CBT to try and get a hold on myself

he has walked out on me so many times for fucking pathetic things that i can't even remember and i am the twat that always sorts it, persuades him we should be together

if i could get myself a new head i would sell everything to get if

ffs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

DocDaneeka Sat 10-May-14 22:29:45

He was so upset that he had to eat his cream brulee, THEN go

He sounds truly heartbroken. Not.

cjelh Sat 10-May-14 22:35:23

go with the gp and counselling and not himxx

ChasedByBees Sat 10-May-14 22:44:48

Sanctimonious hypocritical greedy twat.

I wonder if after you fell apart, you'd suddenly did yourself able to cope? I always found the end of relationships traumatic, but then I would usually realise that actually, I was freed from a relationship with an arsehole. Sorry if that's a bit trite.

He's cost you your job, he must be terrible for you. Get rid, some way, somehow.

EhricLovesTheBhrothers Sat 10-May-14 23:07:05

What a fucking terrible example of manhood to set for your son. Grow a pair and bin him off.

BitterAndOnlySlightlyTwisted Sun 11-May-14 00:02:07

You lost your job because of something he did to you?

Doesn't sound like the sort of chap who deserves to have a three-course meal cooked for him, never mind his favourite.

Bin him. Get better without him. Maybe being with him is the one thing holding you back from getting well.

Limer Sun 11-May-14 00:27:50

What did he do to make you lose your job?

BTW - LTB.

mammadiggingdeep Sun 11-May-14 08:31:09

Oh op. please, get rid. sad

I feel sad for you...you're cooking him a two course meal and he walks out because you swear?? Bin him.

He probably keeps walking out because he knows you then crumbled and beg him back.

He's no good for you, no good for your son either. He cost you your job- that's awful.

What can you do to help you feel stronger this time do you think? Are you working at the mo? Are you busy enough to keep your mind occupied? Do you manage depression the rest if the time?

dingdongdoodlebug Sun 11-May-14 09:42:54

Thank you for your replies. I woke up in the middle of the night with that feeling of dread when I realised that he had walked out again, but I refused to dwell on it. Woke up this morning, yes with some serious anxiety going on, but thats more to do with losing job and other stuff the twat has done to me.... but feeling STRONG and angry with him.

What an utter utter utter tossing wank face fuckwit.

I am determind, absolutely and utterly, to never, ever, ever take him back. If I ever weaken, or go back pleeeease come around to mine and lock me in a cupboard until i come to my senses.

I sent him a text about half an hour after he left saying 'you disgusting repulsive pathetic excuse of an old man' (he is 10 years older than me and sooo sensitive about his age hehe). I then switched my phone off. He sent a reply to see what a vulgar mouthed idiot i am and what a wonderful example i am setting my son.

I think I will email him some of your comments above as he always thinks that it is me that is wrong, and him the reasonable one. Pompous twat

mamad - i managed my depression until i met him two years ago. i have only just lost my job because of him so not working now which i think is good. i can have the summer off and i start a masters degree in september.

I really feel STRONGER than ever today, and long may it last. I will come back and read some of your comments if I have a weak moment (which being realistic I know I will at some point)

littlegreengloworm Sun 11-May-14 09:45:23

Ding... Come on!!!

You lost your job over him, he's using you, he's making you more unhappy.

End it, end it, end it.

You need to value yourself more!! I'd kill him. He'd make me sick.

dingdongdoodlebug Sun 11-May-14 09:46:14

By the way, sorry for my swearing on here! I don't normally swear like that but just needed massive huge vent!

Oh, and when I lost my job he said I can stay home and cook for him and he will provide.

Lucky me.........................................

In other words he will financially control me as well as everything else.

The police want me to make a statement against him (oh, did I mention he is a high ranking police officer..........) and I am tempted... but couldn't face going through court and its best to attempt to have some dignity left

DearPrudence Sun 11-May-14 09:49:33

Texting and emailing him is just carrying on the argument, not ending the relationship.

charlieandlola Sun 11-May-14 09:53:23

Change the locks so he can't get back
In.
Your son deserves better, as do you

cjelh Sun 11-May-14 09:54:46

I've missed the bit why you should make a complaint against him, but wouldn't advise having any more contact with him. However much you show him others agree with you he will just think we are a load of foul mouth people as well so it won't mean anything to him except confirm to him what sort of awful person you are.!!!

Only1scoop Sun 11-May-14 09:55:25

Have I missed something ....police statement....how have police become involved....I thought he just walked out?

Apologies if I'm missing a whole thread....

What did you learn about relationships when growing up dingdong?. Think about it.

Why are you so unable to break away from this man?. You sound codependent on him. That was also learnt from somewhere, likely your own parents. All this needs serious thought. Do you still think on some level he can be rescued and or saved, you can still love him better?. Do you need a man to validate you?. You likely met him at an already low point in your life where your self esteem was damaged, he targeted you accordingly two years ago.

What lessons on relationships are you teaching your son here?.

He does not live with you but you are still unable to break away and even slaved over the oven for this ingrate.

He made you lose your job!!.

He is also keeping you in your ongoing depressive state; you would not fall apart if he was not around you. Infact you would do a hell of a lot better without him. Such cocklodgers are parasites and live off their all too nice and naive host. He sees you as a fool.

I would seriously still consider making a statement against him because he will do to other women as he has done to you. Such types hate women, all of them. He's already also done enough damage to you and by turn your son. Stop displaying "Victim Here" on your forehead!.

I would also suggest you talk to Womens Aid so they can also give you support in getting away 0808 2000 247.

Kewcumber Sun 11-May-14 10:00:23

He seems to be a handy tool for you to reinforce to yourself that you are useless. Deciding that you aren;t useless and shedding the tool seems a very positive step to me however anxious it makes you feel.

What on earth does your 12 year old think of what you put up with from him?

ginmakesitallok Sun 11-May-14 10:08:53

Since when was it illegal to be a twat?

For what it's worth I think he was right to pull you up on your language in front of your child.

Buy as neither of you seems to like the other very much it would be best all round for you to split up.

SanityClause Sun 11-May-14 10:10:09

Don't continue the argument. Just pack up any stuff of his that you have in the house, and arrange for it to get back to him. (Leave it on your doorstep for him to pick up, or on his, if it's not a lot, particularly if you know he will be out.)

Block him from your phone, Facebook, email, etc.

Concentrate on you, and DS. Get another job, and do something for you, like joining a club, or choir, or the like.

If the police thing is about losing your job, I would do it, as it may give credibility in finding another. But you need to weigh this up. How much will it give closure, vs how much will it just make you keep thinking about him?

dingdongdoodlebug Sun 11-May-14 10:32:42

Re police statement, its about domestic abuse. I have told them all about it last year and was going to do statement but he got in my head again and i said i wouldn't. They are investigating anyway and in his attempts to cover up his actions and drink driving he is further being investigated for attempting to pervert the course of justice. He may lose his job, I don't know.

attila you have just taught me two new words which i love - ingrate and cocklodger - they have put a smile on my face smile. Yes poss from parents but i didn't know my dad and he's dead now. Hopefully the counselling will help

I have previously contacted womens aid and will do it again this week.

Feeling determind!

BrunoBrookesDinedAlone Sun 11-May-14 10:58:35

PLEASE make a statement.

I for one would much rather this shitscrape didn't represent me as a member of the police force.

And I think it says it all that you were managing your depression until he showed his ugly abusive face.

Stay away.

If you do, the initial hard time will be replaced by a feeling of ACHIEVEMENT. Of INDEPENDENCE. Of NOT LIVING WITH JUDGEMENT. Of RELAXATION.

You can do it.

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