Contact arrangements for child after domestic violence

[Crunchyontheoutside]

Any lawyers or other experienced people know whether it's normal/appropriate for a solicitor to recommend agreeing contact arrangements outside of court but legally binding, in a case where

• there was domestic violence (physical & emotional) towards the child's mother during the relationship
  
• there has been continued harassment including death threats since the end of relationship
  
• child's father has attempted to take the child from nursery (unauthorised, police were called)
  

My friend is in this situation and I'm not sure she's had good advice. I'm not sure there should be any contact under these circumstances and my friend is uneasy about settling it outside court.

Police say she needs more evidence before she can get a non molestation order.

I'm worried he'll use contact arrangements to continue to try to control her, disrupt her life, or worse (given death threats & attempted abduction).

Any info/advice I can pass on?

[CogitoErgoSometimes]

The police are correct to point to there needing to be evidence of a pattern of violent behaviour, threats and harassment etc. Were all the incidents reported at the time or just the occasion when he attempted to take the child from nursery?

Has your friend spoken to a solicitor specialising in DV cases? Womens Aid 0808 2000 247 can possibly recommend someone locally if she contacts them

[Lweji]

I've stopped all unsupervised contact and, recently, a court (not UK) basically gave me control over contact.

In her case, I'd push for supervised contact at a contact centre and other regular contact via skype or phone.

She should get legal advice from a solicitor with experience of DV.
And WA might help in that respect.

[Crunchyontheoutside]

Thanks - I suggested asking a DV org to recommend a solicitor with more experience. I just wanted to know whether the original solicitor was giving inappropriate advice so I had an idea whether it was worth a second opinion or that's what any lawyer would suggest.

I'll mention supervised contact at contact centre to her.

cogito there has been a pattern over 2/3 years, getting worse since breakup about 8 months ago. But I think only 1/2 incidents reported. I told her to keep all evidence (texts/emails/diary) as soon as I knew what was happening but I don't know how much that adds up to.

Thanks for your responses.