Baby waking makes husband angry with me

[Hubertscubert]

My husband works really hard in a demanding job, be is not the best sleeper. Our second baby has been a bit more challenging than the first as she has reflux, hence she has not been as good a sleeper as our elder daughter. Having said this relatively speaking I don't think she is too bad. She has gone from 7pm, fed at 10.30pm, then through to 6 am since about 4 months, but when she is having a bad spell (teething etc) she willwake at 4 am ( but generally go back down for. Dummy or bottle) n then it can tak a while to break the habit. If we have had a disturbed night my husband shouts or swears at me, and then I face an inquisition as to what went wrong. If I give him reasons he makes me feel stupid and it comes across as excuses. This morning dh had asked to get woken at 6 am, the baby woke at approx 5.45. Therefore he was in a mood with me, he said" what went on last night, what today's excuse? He said he asks other women and they say the baby should b going through the night now. I chose to say nothing.

[GingerMaman]

Gosh he sounds horrid!

My baby wakes up every hour or every 2 hours at 10 months. Understandably DH sleeps in the spare room.

[Hubertscubert]

I will gladly sleep in spare room or the sofa but he still hears it

[RRRJ83]

What's he talking about? He's asked other people and they say baby should be sleeping through!? What nonsense. No wonder you're frustrated.

Tell him to spend one night on a weekend looking after baby and see if he can do better.

[msrisotto]

Wow what an arsehole! Was he like this before?

Obviously I hope you know that neither you nor your baby are to blame for any of this.

[Oakmaiden]

How old is your baby now?

But your husband sounds really unreasonable and aggressive. Not nice :(

[susiedaisy]

He's being completely unreasonable. He's sounds like a spoilt manchild tbh. Remind him it won't last forever and you are doing your best.

[FabBakerGirl]

You are married to a bullying twat. These women who say your baby should be sleeping through clearly need to come round and tell the baby .

It actually sounds like your baby is doing just fine.

[trambampoline]

why isnt he helping, never mind moaning bout a baby waking up in the night.

newsflash, IT'S WHAT BABIES DO!

[desperateforaholiday]

He sounds horrible, my youngest (2) still wakes occasionally in the night and is an early riser.

Does he ever do the nights when he isn't working?

[jayho]

Do you have a spare room,can you sleep with the baby? He should be more understanding but, as I'm sure you know, the first few months are mainly firefighting so choose your battles, do what works best for you. Get your sleep and baby's sleep, he comes third((hugs))

[Orangeanddemons]

He sounds awful. Horrible horrible man.

Dd woke every night until she was 5. All children wake at night. It's what they do. Especially little ones. It's natures way of keeping you close to them

Tell him to get up with dd

[Minnieisthedevilmouse]

I can think of no adequate response but LTB.

That's not helpful. Tbh very h, I also feel guilty if baby wakes dd or dh. No sound reason for that guilt. Who knows why a baby wakes!?!? But I still feel I should have been able to keep her quiet and or back to sleep immediately. And I have a reasonable (mostly) /supportive dh.

I'm sorry you are being treated roughly. It's really unfair.

[jayho]

send him to spare room and co-sleep until she's settled

[imme]

He sounds awful! To me your baby seems like a fairly good sleeper! Sleep deprivation gets out the worst in us but he is definitely. going too far in his accusations!

[Hubertscubert]

Baby is 8 months old

[cathpip]

Tell your husband to fuck right off, and as for excuses tell him there isn't one, she is a baby and sometimes they wake in the night, and all the females that he has asked can also fuck off too!!!!

[TurnipCake]

He sounds hideous, OP. Is this the first time you've posted about him?

[curiousuze]

How bloody dare he speak to you like that? What an arsehole he sounds.

Sounds like your baby is a really good sleeper to be honest. You just keep doing what you're doing - if he's got a problem he can go fuck himself.

[Mandown]

What a stupid, horrid man! Your baby sounds great actually. Mine wakes every three hours at four months. It's what babies do x

[eurochick]

The problem is not the baby. It is that he is a twat. Was he always like this or is it a new thing?

[CogitoErgoSometimes]

I'm sorry you're married to such a terrible bully.

[Hubertscubert]

Great to have your thoughts, I didn't think she was that bad a sleeper either.

[ChristineDaae]

Sorry, your husband is a dick.

Are you breastfeeding? If not, come Saturday night hand him the baby at 6pm and tell him you expect not to hear a sound until at least 9am. See how he likes it.

[LoisPuddingLane]

What a horrible bully! And why is he "being asked to be woken" at 6am? Can't he fucking wake himself up? How ridiculous to complain about being woken 15 minutes early.

Tell him to fuck off.

[RedRoom]

Perhaps sleep deprivation is affecting him badly at work, hence his horrible grumps. If his job is high pressure, tiredness can make that unbearable. You say he doesn't sleep well anyway, and I think he is struggling to function on the sleep he does get. No an excuse, but certainly an explanation. I used to have chronic sleep problems which made me a right bitch every morning to my wonderful, wonderful DH, so I have more sympathy than most because I know how unreasonable it can make you. Regardless, no one is more sleep deprived in your household than you, and you aren't behaving like that. I suggest he buys ear plugs. and sleeps in the room furthest from the baby. Do you have a baby monitor so that you can be alert to her waking before the crying starts?