I have 2 dds 18 and 17 who are both doing great at school got part time jobs not been to much trouble. but too me and in the home they can be disrespectful rude and lazy, a lot of this is my fault as when their df left I over compensated for his failings as a farther and let them get away with too much sometimes for a quite life.
In the summer Dp moved in after two years together he always got on ok with the dds he has a ds who is 16 but hasn't full time lived with him for years. so big adjustments
all round living with two teen girls.
but one big issue he hates the way the dds speak to me and our lazy in the home and don't help. he and dd1 have had some clashes over the way she has spoken to him, but he has mostly stayed in the background leaving it too me to sort it.
we have had many discussions how I need to get a backbone and not let the dds treat me the way they do saying that I must back him up as he is a adult and will not be spoken to like that.
I have also had dd in tears saying that he has said hurtful things to her and that I haven't backed her up.
it all came to head last night , I came in from work tired dp was cooking as it was his day off dds were just sitting watching telly no offers to help, any way dd1 couldn't find her charger so dp just said mine is on my dressing table and that's mine, (had issues with charges going missing lost ect dds just taking his from our room with out asking) dd1 blew up started shouting at him saying he was selfish and rude. he lost it really had a go at dd1 telling her had never met anyone so rude and bad manners and that she was lazy and wouldn't get on in life and her altitude is vile. it was full on shouting between them.
DD1 getting upset I couldn't handle it and told dp if he thinks like that about my dd he should leave and just to go.
Well he has, said he has enough and that all he asked of me was to back him up when needed.
I am so upset as apart from this everything was good and I love him he is thoughtful and kind and we laugh so much.
my friend in rl knew as soon as I spoke to her what the problem was as in the dds and said I should have backed him, the thing is the dd1 will most likely be off to uni this year and dd2 next and then I will be on my own, I am scared that I will resent the dds for the break up of my relationship.
He is sure that he cant go on living like this as all he asked was my back up.
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
I as Dp to leave last night. am so upset
twoteens · 18/03/2014 11:20
Don’t want to miss threads like this?
Weekly
Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!
Log in to update your newsletter preferences.
You've subscribed!
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.