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Relationships

Have i been single so long that i have lost touch with what is socially acceptable?

63 replies

leopardprintsock · 30/11/2013 09:03

This isnt a dating nor relationship question.

Ive been on my own for 5 years, this will be my sixth christmas on my own.
Ive taken to buying a few things for myself, One for DD to wrap and give me, one from the pets and then a few from ' father christmas'.

This all came about because a few years ago when DD was about 4 she asked why i had nothing to open christmas morning and assumed i must have been ' bad' Since then ive just got myself a few bits and i dont think anything of it.

Got myself a new toaster, mentioned to a friend i wanted to use it now but was putting it away to give myself for xmas and she burst out laughing, properly, tears down her face.

My family also reacted the same way.

Im just wondering if ive totally lost the plot here.

OP posts:
kickassangel · 30/11/2013 09:04

Nothing wrong with getting yourself gifts, but try something a bit more exciting than a toaster.

lastnightopenedmyeyes · 30/11/2013 09:05

No I don't see anything strange or amusing at all. I don't think you've lost the plot?!

bragmatic · 30/11/2013 09:05

A few bits and pieces? Doesn't sound too odd, to me.

mrscraig · 30/11/2013 09:06

I think that's really insensitive of your friend.
You're keeping the Christmas magic alive for your daughter. And if you benefit from a few little gifts from Santa, even better . You sound like a lovely mummy.

CatelynStark · 30/11/2013 09:07

Well, your mate would fair piss herself at me then - I've got some lovely kitchen bowls I'm giving myself.

Because I'm worth it Grin

breatheslowly · 30/11/2013 09:07

No, that sounds like a good idea. I'm married an I am doing the shopping for all of us for Xmas including my presents. I'll probably do the wrapping too. I don't think what you are doing is any different.

DonkeysDontRideBicycles · 30/11/2013 09:11

Sounds like the ones cracking up aren't exactly rushing to give you even a token gift normally then? Shame on them.

Alanna1 · 30/11/2013 09:13

I think your friend laughed because it was a toaster - with you, not at you. Its the same thing that makes me laugh that I'm giving my 2 year old a peppa pig toothbrush for christmas (she needs a new toothbrush). But she gets other things too and so should you! More seriously, do you have a little network you could do a secret santa with?

Gintonic · 30/11/2013 09:15

I take it you only have the one child, I think it is a lovely idea as I bet she enjoys seeing you unwrap your gifts too. Otherwise she would be doing it on her own. Ignore your friend!

CallMeNancy · 30/11/2013 09:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Tobagostreet · 30/11/2013 09:17

Completely normal - nothing wrong with what you're doing.

Today is my birthday and (despite me having a DH) I bought all my own gifts and unwrapped them in surprise this morning so my DC's could watch me be so happy about my lovely, thoughtful presents (one of which is a dieters recipe book!).

Not really looking forward to when the DC's are older and they insist on picking presents Shock!

Enjoy your new toaster!

CocktailQueen · 30/11/2013 09:17

Not odd or strange at all. Your friend is a twat. But agree with the others - buy yourself some more exciting pressies! Xx

TiredDog · 30/11/2013 09:19

I think you are practical and kind to think of your daughter. I can imagine doing the same tbh It's a shame that someone isn't buying it for you but in the absence you should consider a far more frivolous luxury item :)

Preciousbane · 30/11/2013 09:20

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

chanie44 · 30/11/2013 09:20

Totally normal to wrap up a few prezzies. My sis is a single parent and I buy her stocking fillers from the children so she has something to open on Xmas morning with the children.

Please stop giving yourself household stuff. Get yourself some bits for you, that you will enjoy opening and using.

leopardprintsock · 30/11/2013 09:20

there isnt really money for frivolous things for me.

I do get some presents, but they arent on christmas morning. Ill get a secret santa at work, and some with family later on in the day, but i just dont ever have anything to open christmas morning. i dont mind but im guessing DD does.

I have an only child, shes nearly 8.


i just thought that perhaps id totally lost the plot and become the weird single woman.

dont even talk to me about penis photos......!!!!!

OP posts:
leopardprintsock · 30/11/2013 09:22

and im pleased with the toaster, its a thing of beauty and was £40. Its a nice one....

it would be stupid to waste money on silly things that i dont use or need just for them to gather dust.

OP posts:
Dilidali · 30/11/2013 09:24

I would burst out laughing hearing you're wrapping the toaster too . But no malice there whatsoever. Promise.

But I would have thought something like a book, a box of chocolate, a lipbalm or a nail varnish would be a bit more self indulgent at Christmas type of thing (just an example).
Says the woman who really wants a tool box and a power drill. Just not for Christmas.

HedgehogsRevenge · 30/11/2013 09:24

You're friend sounds rather insensitive. Did you not ask her what was so funny? I'm a LP and also single. A couple of years ago ds got upset I had no presents to open so now I always buy myself a few bits and pieces to put under the tree. You're friend would have a field day with me, i've even filled a stocking with stuff I already had when particularly skint, just to please Ds. There's a thread on LP's about everyone buying themselves presents, it's perfectly normal.

maparole · 30/11/2013 09:28

Nothing strange about it at all ... you deserve a pressie or two as much an anyone else.

FWIW, I used to buy and wrap my own presents when I was married, else I'd just get useless tat I didn't want, so your situation is far less odd Smile

leopardprintsock · 30/11/2013 09:28

hedhehog - bless you. The stocking you did yourself has me a bit choked up.

OP posts:
TheOriginalNutcracker · 30/11/2013 09:30

Your friend sounds like she doesn't have a clue tbh.

My mum always gets a couple of cheap bits and bobs for my kids to give me but if she didn't id get myself something to open too.

Hope you have a nice Xmas Smile

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akawisey · 30/11/2013 09:33

Well I feel fine now because I've bought myself a Wesco bread bin!!!!

HedgehogsRevenge · 30/11/2013 09:36

The things we do for our kids eh. I do actually get presents from my parents but usually later in the day when we visit. I've went all out this year and bought myself a tablet!

nopanicandverylittleanxiety · 30/11/2013 09:37

I think it is a lovely idea. One of my friends does this with pandora charms. She actually gets a surprise, because she leaves the shop for a minute and the girls in there help her ds to choose one.

I'm a single mum and if a spent xmas at home I would do the same as her. But we all stay at my parents so I have presents off them to open so lack the excuse to treat myself!

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