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DM being negative.

(27 Posts)

My DM is being negative towards me about my wedding. I have no idea why.

So we got engaged last year. DM said okay. Wanted to know why DP hadn't asked her permission etc. Anyway, after all that, she was fine. Said she wanted help out financially. Also offered that she would try and arrange use of a family farm (they hold functions a lot)

I fell pregnant & was quite unwell (hyperemesis) So we put off for a year.

Now I have had dd and all fine, we decided to start planning a couple of months ago.

Except DM is either negative or refuses to talk about it. confused I would discuss it and she would change the subject.

Some lots of examples:

She went to the family farm for an event they had there. Did not tell me to come along, but offered to take my 2 DS. Fine. Bit confused why we weren't invited, but got boys ready & off they all went. I said I wanted to ask about farm, would she mind? Anyway they got back, asked how it all went etc (the day out) Then mentioned the use of it. She says she didn't ask & wasn't a good idea to.

Another time, I showed her a dry hire barn. Quite a good deal. She just asks me how on earth am I going to afford that.(said in an incredulous way) So obviously, I completely understand that she is entitled to change her mind about her offer of financial help. Just thought she would tell me in an adult discussion.

Me & DP mentioned a wedding show we were going to. DM said that she would come instead & DP could stay with DC. So next day waited & waited. No show. Rang her & she just spoke about other things.

Told her we were going to look around venues whilst we were deep in gossip on the phone. She said 'Hmm. Okay. Got to go. Bye' Then hung up the phone.

So I left it for ages to mention it again as it's bloody hurtful. We decided to just make the best of it re the budget we have. Best man offered us a venue. Had some lovely help on here. Start to feel good about it all again.

So start to mention it to DM again. She puts down everything I say about it. everything is shit basically. None of it is good enough & it sounds like she thinks the whole thing is tacky. She says I'm not capable of organising a wedding.

Has anyone experienced this at all? Its just horrible & she brings me to tears regarding how 'shit' she thinks its going to be.

I'll just say key points to her. The date, place, time etc.

Its sad.But its okay.

RandomMess Sun 27-Oct-13 20:17:36

Blimey I'd just send her an invite once it's all booked and sorted out.

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