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You know when women's who have cheating husbands lose the plot and do something dramatic?

(152 Posts)
ITCouldBeWorse Mon 23-Sep-13 22:13:25

You know like burn all their clothes, or detail what has happened on FB?

And people say keep your dignity etc, do you actually judge the wronged women at all?

I cannot see his anyone could. My friend carved 'adulteress' on the bonnet of the car of OW and I have to admit I thought it dramatic and appropriate. Good on anyone who does feel like an ice queen, but I actually think it might be cathartic.

But to anyone in that position right now, my best wishes to you, as the song says 'you will survive'

TheGerontocracy Wed 25-Sep-13 10:46:42

You don't demonstrate the importance of 'basic human decency' by acting like a loon.

Especially to a cheating liar, who doesn't give a fuck what you think anyway.

ImTooHecsyForYourParty Wed 25-Sep-13 13:45:09

I think when you've been crapped upon from a great height, the shittee can be forgiven for not at that point choosing to model to the shitter the importance of basic human decency.

The point at which that was the requirement was before the shitter chose to dive ball deep into another woman and lie about it / bounce about on some other bloke and lie about it. Once they've lied to your face and treated you like shit on their shoe, they've lost the right to expect from you the decent treatment they denied to you by their choices and actions.

That is just my view. It's not the law, (although I wish it was wink ) We're just all putting in our own opinions.

itwillgetbettersoon Wed 25-Sep-13 16:07:08

I think the ex wife is always going to be painted as a nutter whatever. Her ex husband will have lied and lied in order to justify having an affair and in the end he and the ow will believe it. I've not done anything mad but I can just imagine my STBXH having his head patted by his girlfriend agreeing with him that I am mad!

Chyochan Wed 25-Sep-13 16:11:11

I think its people who are denied any expression of thier anger towards what the other person has done to them that are likely to enact some kind of revenge.

Funny how many people personally know someone who did the "hiding fish" urban myth smile

Friend of a friend by any chance? grin wink

ImpOfDarkness Wed 25-Sep-13 17:59:59

it's comforting to know that you behaved as a grown-up after the dust has settled

Actually seven years down the line, I find it pretty comforting that my ex got to feel the extent of my wrath at least once.

macthecatsmum Wed 25-Sep-13 18:07:13

when ds needed revenge (cock of a bil was abusive) when she got all her stuff back she also took his collection of faine waines. she would steam off a label and send it back with a note such as "was alright in a stew" "had a glass-poured the rest away""drank 3 of these with....we got steaming" from various postboxes around the country.

Sleeptimenow Wed 25-Sep-13 18:13:53

My friend hid a haddock under the bath on the hot pipes when she went round to her cheating partners flat to collect her stuff, needless to say it gave her lots of satisfaction. I thought it was a rather inventive.

redundantandbitter Wed 25-Sep-13 18:37:46

I posted a thread earlier this week... Dumped coz DP has had a 'sprititual awakening' and wants to shag a yoga teacher he met at healing camp.., yes I am hacked off, disappointed... And I still have a key to his house (he has one for mine) and various other things he's going to need soon... But I used it to bob round there last week and leave him some M&S food, beer and a card.. I wA making sure he was eating but also reminding him that I am a bloody nice person who cares and loves him. Think he found that harder than a vengeful action., .. Though between you and me I haven't ruled one out... Just thinking of something... Isn't revenge best served cold?

ImpOfDarkness Wed 25-Sep-13 19:26:32

reminding him that I am a bloody nice person who cares and loves him

In my experience, he'll see that as evidence of you being a doormat and a sap.

cottoncandy Wed 25-Sep-13 19:44:34

When I was at school one of the dads left the mum for his secretary.

The mum went to his work with a big knife and stabbed the secretary many many times. She served a few years and I now see her in my local supermarket with her grandchildren.

AnitaManeater Wed 25-Sep-13 20:01:57

I've done a few naughty things for revenge. When I was packing his stuff up I threw all his Star Wars figures in a black bag and messed up all their guns and accessories. I also discovered a huge porn stash. I drove round to the OWs house where he was hiding and threw each magazine over the garden fence, I could hear her dog going mad on the other side, ripping them to shreds grin

Beccaloolah Wed 25-Sep-13 20:31:53

I texted the OW - YOU ARE A CUNT!

Three years on and I still see her around the office and she still runs a mile from me, avoids the toilets near me and even uses the stairs - all 22 flights of them - to avoid bumping into me in the lift.

He never left her for me. The exact opposite. I binned him this year (he also used prostitutes) but I do take a small amount of joy from her discomfort and I'm not convinced that's a bad thing.

Shenanagins Wed 25-Sep-13 20:50:48

My revenge was to hire a shit hot lawyer and hit him where it would really hurt - his pocket!

still makes me smile even after all these years.

WeAreSeven Wed 25-Sep-13 22:15:33

Becca, you work with the OW!shock Did you work together at the time?

Lweji Wed 25-Sep-13 23:24:43

Throwing Star Wars figures in a black bag is totally unreasonable! I hope they went to charity or something. angry

Giving back porn magazines is just kind. grin
I'd have left a package with a note.

BarbarianMum Thu 26-Sep-13 02:21:20

<<Funny how many people personally know someone who did the "hiding fish" urban myth

Friend of a friend by any chance? >>

No, I really did (do) know her. It was 20 years ago mind, so was rather a less well known form of revenge then.

CuChullain Thu 26-Sep-13 08:24:33

Interesting thread.

My mate (bloke) who got married earlier this year found out last month that his wife was shagging someone at work. He has thrown her out the house. Any (legal) revenge suggestions from the oracle that is MN

LittlePeaPod Thu 26-Sep-13 08:59:37

Barbarian the prawn an fish thing. It happened. She's one of my three closest friends. It's defo not a myth here..

TheGirlFromIpanema Thu 26-Sep-13 12:44:00

Redundant it certainly is best served cold and calculating grin
Bide your time and an opportunity will almost certainly present itself, hopefully when the revengee is least expecting it wink

Leaving something fishy somewhere inappropriate is definitely not an urban myth in my world, I have aided and abetted in its use more than once.

Neeliethere Thu 26-Sep-13 16:44:53

My revenge will be when she shuts up shop in the carnal sense when she realises how much more important he is than anyone else.

How much whatever he wants comes first and how much he will lie to get what he wants when he wants it. How much he will consider any reasonable request from the kids (two of them much younger than our) is just too much to bear and throw a tantrum like a four year old.

When he realises he's just changed the name and nothing else.

When it dawns on him how much difference it makes when you have a wife that was always ready to support herself and her family by getting out of bed every morning and slepping into work to ensure a decent income for the family.

And of course that he has no money because it all has to go to the first wife he dumped in the midst of his mid life crisis and the new one doesn't earn anything.

That is revenge enough for me .

DistanceCall Thu 26-Sep-13 17:04:05

About Lady Graham-Moon:

When, after 27 years, her second marriage ground to a halt, Lady Graham-Moon was determined that it should end in a civilised way. She and her husband led separate lives under the same roof while their decree nisi went through.

By her own admission, she had no further use for him in bed.

But she was then told by a "friend" that her husband was having an affair with a woman down the road.

It was, she said, as if her husband had pulled the scab off a wound.
So at 3am one morning she visited the house of his new lover, Amanda Acheson, and poured five litres of white gloss paint all over his prized blue BMW, which was parked outside.

She then returned to their nearby former marital home in East Garston, Berkshire, and took a pair of scissors to his 32 Savile Row suits, chopping a sleeve off each one.

Finally, she raided his vintage wine cellar and distributed the contents, including bottles of Chateau Latour '61 worth £300, to all their neighbours.
Lady Graham-Moon later said that she had been driven to revenge by that fact that her husband had been conducting his affair "right on my doorstep".

Sorry, but that's insane. Any way you look atit.

Justconfused Thu 26-Sep-13 17:24:54

Sorry but I don't blame her

I cut upmy husband's suits and favourite shirts when I found out. I don't regret it one bit. It made me feel better and it still does when I think about it now

To all those involved in fish-related revenge: I apologise for doubting you grin

I guess it's an urban myth because it really does happen a lot!

Mosman Fri 27-Sep-13 12:30:19

You see if you know the marriage has gone then revenge is ridiculous. If your in blissful unawareness and shagging him, washing his socks, raising his kids whilst he's fucking around then chopped up suits is getting off lightly

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