Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

no idea what to call this thread

(72 Posts)
Blondeorbrunette Mon 16-Sep-13 13:52:34

I have no ideb where to start sorting out the shit heap that is my life.

I cant make a decision to save my life. When i do, i cant stick to it.

I think im depressed, i dont even know that.
I have madd an app with my doctor for thurs to discuss this.

All that has gone wrong in my life is catching up with me.

My horrendous childhood, my shit parents. My brother attempted sex with me when i was 14.
At the end of may i went out for a drink and i got a taxi home. Woke up in the morning without a stitch on. I have very little memory of what happened.

When i go to doc on thursday im gonna tell him i need help or im gonna throw my phone in the cnal and go missing.

I just dont know where to start.

Im a cunt to everyone around. What comes out of my mouth is shocking.

To top it off i am stuck in a marriageh want out of.

I hate my life. I hate it.

LuisSuarezTeeth Wed 25-Sep-13 19:26:41

BB that's great news, I'm very much in awe of your bravery. I wish you all the luck in the world - keep posting though, we are all still here for you!

Madlizzy Wed 25-Sep-13 21:20:12

Well done! You're really bloody amazing. Look at what you've done in such a short time. Go you! grin

Blondeorbrunette Thu 26-Sep-13 11:47:51

Wil respond when i have more time sorry!

He woke me up last night in bed plazing with me. Boak
and i said no chance. He said to me you have woken me up and now im horny. Said cant we just do doggy i said no. He got cross and said well im horny, what you gonna do abt it.

My god he has no respect for me does he.

This morning he turned me around to give me a hug. Wtf.

Stay with my ladies, i feel as though my chest is going to burst. The pressure is overwhelming.

Im going to fuckin do this!!

Madlizzy Thu 26-Sep-13 21:16:41

Ew. He assaulted you in your sleep. Ew. What a vile man. You are so going to do this!

Lweji Thu 26-Sep-13 21:27:57

Use that righteous anger.

Stay strong.

therewearethen Thu 26-Sep-13 22:52:35

Your update about packing made me smile just hang tight, I hope you get out soon, take care x

ButterMyArse Thu 26-Sep-13 23:04:45

Just seen your thread. He is an abusive fuckwit, isn't he?

So glad you're getting out. Keep posting.

Blondeorbrunette Fri 27-Sep-13 10:23:29

I am swinging between euphoria and despair every 5 mins. This is all i can think about!

Patosshades Fri 27-Sep-13 12:59:36

He didn't have sex with you against your will did he? I hope I'm reading your message wrong.

Blondeorbrunette Fri 27-Sep-13 18:54:16

I woke up and it was in. He was spooning me. Bastard.

ButterMyArse Fri 27-Sep-13 23:13:25

He raped you. What a fucking pig of a man. sad

You're off this weekend, yes? Stay strong - no one deserves abuse as part of their everyday life.

Lweji Sat 28-Sep-13 03:58:49

Fingers crossed for Saturday. smile

You should then go to the police and report him for rape, although you won't.

Please make sure you are safe.

Not sure what you have planed for after leaving, but do not meet him, at least not without other people around.
He's a rapist and may well turn violent.

Blondeorbrunette Sat 28-Sep-13 16:26:56

Im leaving today. He is a cunt.
Feel fine for now smile

ReviewsOffers Sat 28-Sep-13 16:32:23

Good luck Blondeorbrunette

The best days are yet to come smile

Shellywelly1973 Sat 28-Sep-13 17:10:11

Keep us updated.

Your stronger then you think...look at what you've got through already.

Best of luck.

Tske care of yourself & your dc.

ButterMyArse Sat 28-Sep-13 17:21:30

GOOD LUCK! See you on the other side smile

Blondeorbrunette Sat 28-Sep-13 17:33:17

Im gone. Will update later

Madlizzy Sat 28-Sep-13 18:44:54

Brilliant! Will look out for your update. x

Lweji Sat 28-Sep-13 19:20:37

grin

Well done.

Now, make sure you keep away.
Coping with the begging and seemingly changed it's the difficult part.

So happy for you! Well done, well done, well done! x

Blondeorbrunette Sun 29-Sep-13 01:24:55

He wont beg, not ome bit. We have been here before.

Feel a bit off, had a little cry.

I know this is the right thing.

A good man doesnt hit his wife.

And that's it in a nutshell, BB. A good man does not hit his wife. You should never feel intimidated or scared by your partner.

If ever you feel tempted to go back, please remember that. He won't change, you know this.

You're free now, and your DC are free. Things will get better and better for you now. You'll look back in years to come and realise that this was your turning point. And YOU did it. Well done, I mean it.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now