I need some help or advice, I dont know.
I'm going crazy in my head and I just would like to see what others think sbout my situaction.
I'm 30 years old and been with my partner for 10 years now. We have a 3 year old daughter.
We had some ups and downs.
I felt many times that maybe I should leave him... We have been trough a lot during these 10 years and we love each other. However we r not like soulmates or anything. He's not sensitive and not romantic. Very practical, doesnt like to talk, during horrendous times in our relationship I would slap him in the face and he would do the same or worse. Dont want anybody to think that he's abusing me but he 's very rough emotionally when we r arguing. Now we no longer argue. Life became easier. He is out of this world good father. However I remember the bad times... and here comes the problem... The other man.
I met him when I was pregnant - he's mates with my partner. When I saw him - I couldnt stop thinking about him. It was weird, but soon I put that at the back of my mind and life moved on. Thats the time when after the birth me and my partner hit the rough times... After 3 years we went back to a good place and weirdly thats when I began my affair... I felt awful cheating on my boyfriend. I felt like I'm cheating on my child and the whole family all together. The guilt and confusion were a killer but I continued the affair for few months.
I love him. He loves me. He's my soulmate.
Now the affair ended but I miss him badly.
I dont know how to cope or get rid off that love.
The om is single now, going through divorce, have 2 daughters. Ugly divorce. He told me I have a beautiful family and should be with them even though every cell in his body wants to be with me.
Sorry for a long post and it all somehow sounds pathetic on papper but I'm just hurt and confused,
Anybody been in similar situaction?
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
I had an affair, in love with the OM
AKVS · 21/08/2013 23:36
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