As in, spending money on you or you both as a couple. ie birthday, anniversary, just for the hell of it, night out etc.. Do they spend little - or nothing at all. If so..is it just the 'way he/she is'? (ie not just down to being skint, as is in my DP's case).As in, If they had the money, they'd be the same. We rarely go out as I can't afford to pay for two. We've been together four years and only once has he bought me flowers, and that was only because I cleaned his house from top to bottom (and i mean really deep clean) before I lived with him. It's not like i expect him to pay his way if we were to go out. I've never been like that with any man. I would always go 50/50. But he can't afford his share (and when he does, doesn't want to) and i can't pay for two.
If your partner is like this, why are they? Do you just accept it? Am i being old fashioned? I actually don't expect flowers etc but just to be treated now and then would be nice, I mean he wouldn't even extend to a coffee if we were out, he thinks its a waste of money. Just to go out fairly regularly and be able to share the costs would be great...but if we go out (which is rare) i do end up paying for all or most otherwise we never would. And i end up feeling resentful (even if we had a great day out ) as i can rarely afford it (i really wouldn't care, if i could afford...i really do not believe the man should pay for everything)
And is your partner generous in other ways , if they are tight with the cash? Mine is but i still feel hard done by at times. Then again I have friends that have shite partners that lavish expensive gifts, hols etc and treat them like dirt..yes i envy the few that have the lovely and generous partners!
Please don't think i'm shallow /mercenary in any way. It would be just nice to go out more often and split the costs. We don't even have kids together (he has child who lives with his ex..i have none) so we do have the freedom to go out..no worrying about finding babysitter etc. As i can't have kids, i wish i could enjoy that freedom... maybe i'm unreasonable and i'm with the wrong person :-(
I don't want a rich man! I just want some normality with the one i've got! (ie going out, doing stuff...)
Maybe we're just incompatible..he's 15 yrs older and a 'homebody' I still like going out and get cabin fever, doesn't help we're in a tiny flat...
Sorry this has turned out long
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Relationships
Does anyone have a partner who is utterly tight with money?
alltoomuchrightnow · 13/06/2013 17:59
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