Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

I called DP a stink breath and he's still upset

(32 Posts)
AxlsUnderpants Thu 16-May-13 14:56:04

DP eats milky buttons constantly and uses talc after a bath. The smell makes me feel sick, he constantly smells like a baby and I've told him before that it bothers me. Last night he came to kiss me and all I could smell was the awful sickly milky buttons on his breath and so I pulled away and called him stink breath. He normally texts me during the day but today he hasn't so I'm guessing he's still upset but how do you get through to someone if they won't listen or do not care?? It honestly makes me feel ill.

peggotty Thu 16-May-13 14:57:35

So he smells like a toddler? I'm not surprised you're put off!

ExscooseMeMrOfficer Thu 16-May-13 14:58:40

How old are you both? You sound like two toddlers hmm

CogitoErgoSometimes Thu 16-May-13 15:00:05

Is this the tip of an iceberg situation? Talc seems an odd thing to get this upset about. Can you not 'get through' to him about other things? Does not listening and not caring happen in other areas of your relationship?

lisaro Thu 16-May-13 15:04:49

I agree - how old are you both? Bet he comes home tonight and calls you a poo poo head. hmm

cinnamonsugar Thu 16-May-13 15:11:32

So he smells like a toddler?
Yes, because only toddlers eat chocolate ... hmm

OP, I can assure you I wouldn't be talking to my partner after they rejected a kiss and called me names. Actually, I would be talking to them to tell them I thought it was unacceptable. Of course he's still upset; it doesn't sound like you've apologised unequivocally. Imagine if a woman posted on here "Last night I tried to kiss my partner after eating some chocolate buttons and he pushed me away and then called me Stink Breath'

how do you get through to someone if they won't listen or do not care
You communicate properly and sensitively, while acknowledging the fact that there's fuckall wrong with what he's doing, but that it's a problem for you so would he mind doing XYZ for you. (e.g. finding a differently fragranced talc). Use some empathy to imagine how you'd feel in his position.

Squitten Thu 16-May-13 16:10:36

Doesn't sound like you handled that very maturely OP!

My DH suffered from bad breath. It was mostly caused by his drinking coffee a lot, the smell of which I cannot stand. I just told him politely that I didn't like the smell that the coffee left on his breath (not sure of that was actually it but it was as good an excuse as any!) and that maybe using mouthwash would help. He did, it worked, all good! Nobody offended.

You shouldn't be communicating with him by calling him names!

A1980 Thu 16-May-13 17:07:00

If my partner refused to kiss me and called.me stink.breath he would be in the dog.house.

That was really mean.

dopeysheep Thu 16-May-13 17:18:10

She said she has told him it boyhers her and he did nothing.
So maybe she was upset that he ignored her and resorted to name calling. It's understandable.
Why does he constantly eat milky buttons? Can't be good for his teeth.

Thurlow Thu 16-May-13 17:25:47

Hmmm...

OK, on the odd occasion DP or I might have made a joke about one of us smelling after, say, eating mackerel or going to the gym. It's always light-hearted and said jokingly.

But it sounds like the way you said it wasn't a joke. The smell might bother you, but that wasn't the way to deal with it.

BigBlockSingsong Thu 16-May-13 17:27:29

I have to admit I chortled a bit,

I think we've all kissed our partners whilst maybe they've eaten something not so nice, tea breath isn't so nice but I'm guilty of it too.

cinnamonsugar Thu 16-May-13 18:29:37

dopeysheep No, it's not really excusable. Many people don't ever resort to name calling and when dealing with far more serious issues. OP hasn't said what she previously said either or how she tried to tackle it. Maybe it's understandable that her partner didn't respond to it because of how it was put, hmm?

I do think cogito may be onto something though and wonder if there are other issues. It's not a good sign to be repulsed by the smell of your partner.

Lovingfreedom Thu 16-May-13 18:40:26

Talk has no place in a 21st century bathroom, unless its for easing on latex clothing

Lovingfreedom Thu 16-May-13 18:41:04

Talc even...bloody spell checker ruining my jokes!

Lovingfreedom Thu 16-May-13 18:42:51

If you called me 'stink breath' you would be dumped though.

nenevomito Thu 16-May-13 18:43:39

If he's being an arse as you called him stinky breath, he needs to get over himself a bit!

southbank Thu 16-May-13 18:50:55

A grown man that smells like a toddler!hilarious and so attractive!
The combination of milky buttons and talc is so odd for a grown man.

Lovingfreedom Thu 16-May-13 18:55:56

Does he have a baby fetish...you know like they always used to show on Eurotrash and that kind of thing? Big grown up banker or accountant likes to wear nappies at the weekend. Talc my bum bum mummy.

AuntieEggy Thu 16-May-13 19:06:16

talc my bum bum i nearly wet myself. You might need to wipe me LOL

ratspeaker Thu 16-May-13 19:49:39

Have you told him before that you dislike the smell of the talc and the buttons?

He was obviously offended by your comment.
Could you make amends by buying him a present,maybe some different smelling talc, body spray and mouthwash.

RubyOnRails Thu 16-May-13 19:52:06

I'm boaking at the thought of being with a man who uses talc...even the word makes me heave. TALC.

MrsWolowitz Thu 16-May-13 19:54:49

confused

Just ask him to clean his teeth.

Don't call him names.

<throws wine against wall and stares at wasp on windowsill>

unapologetic Thu 16-May-13 20:50:39

Well I like a manly man and I can't think of anything worse than a partner smelling like you describe! It sounds revolting. Why is he acting like a baby? Some smells really put me off but it can be a sign that you don't like a person when you start associating a certain smell with them and it turns your stomach.

Skinnywhippet Thu 16-May-13 22:00:08

What is wrong with talc?! I don't use it often, but sometimes put it on my 'legpits' to stop them getting itchy!

QuertyQueen Thu 16-May-13 23:34:04

He sounds MOST unattractive.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now