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Sex with cousin

(132 Posts)
Bitofadviceplease Thu 02-May-13 22:11:31

How wrong is it?

LadyIsabellaWrotham Fri 03-May-13 07:30:36

I'd be worried about the genetics with a full cousin, but this bloke is one step more distant, and you're not planning to breed ATM, so I don't really see a problem.

Bunbaker Fri 03-May-13 07:57:36

Flowers in the Attic

Fucking grim. If you can clearly trace how you are biologically related then it's a no go IMO. Grim.

KittensandKids Fri 03-May-13 08:30:24

My cousins married and now have 2 lovely DC. They used to argue a lot when they first met which led to family tension but when they settled down they make a good couple.

They rarely seen each other as when they were young.

BigBlockSingsong Fri 03-May-13 08:34:16

Your cousins son?

how big is the age gap? may be legal but erm,no....

mumblechum1 Fri 03-May-13 08:34:44

*Dispatches reveals the tragic consequences of first cousin marriage in Britain. Every year such marriages cause hundreds of children to be born with terrible disabilities; one third of whom are so ill that they die before they are five years old.

The practice is most common in Britain's Pakistani community, in which more than 50% of people marry their first cousin, and in Bradford 75% of ethnic Pakistanis follow the tradition.

It is also common in some Middle Eastern and East African communities here, and in the UK's Bangladeshi community, nearly a quarter of people marry their first cousins.

It also happens in the white British community: Dispatches features a couple, first-cousins-once-removed, whose daughter died of a genetic disease.

The medical risks include infant mortality, birth defects, learning difficulties, blindness, hearing impairment and metabolic disorders. As adults, the offspring of these relationships also risk sporadic abortions or infertility.

Reporter Tazeen Ahmad meets affected families, including one with three children with serious degenerative genetic diseases. Tazeen's own grandparents were first cousins: five of their children died before the age of ten, and three of her uncles were deaf.

Dispatches questions why no major national publicity campaign warns of these health risks. At-risk couples in some areas are offered genetic counselling, with some being offered selection of embryos or terminations, but as only 40% of recessive disorders can be medically tested for, this is of limited use.

Even talking about the practice is controversial. And, although many British studies have established the risks, people still deny the dangers and extol the benefits of marrying within the family. But others within the community say the risks should be publicised.*

At our local special needs school, Pakistani and Bangladeshi children are heavily over represented because of the practice of first cousins marrying, according to the Head.

It's heartbreaking to see so many children suffering from disabilities which are caused directly by this practice, and I think it should be illegal for that reason.

chocmallow Fri 03-May-13 08:35:18

I couldn't and wouldn't. But then I know it would not go down well in our family. Do you think you'll continue the relationship? Are there any real feelings or just lustful ones?

I would never do it. Far too incestuous. I wouldn't even think of my 'cousins' (mums' friends sons) in that way.

MiniPenguinMaker Fri 03-May-13 09:15:33

Legal, shemal. And it might be fun. But how awkward would that break up be?! And family events in years to come... not worth it, I would imagine!

I think a lot would depend on how you were brought up- my daughter is being brought up with her cousin almost as close as a brother. We live 2 minutes away, in and out of houses, day trips together. It would be very wrong in my eyes if they got together. Very, very, very wrong!

puds11isNAUGHTYnotNAICE Fri 03-May-13 09:27:50

How would your family react? Would you have a problem with telling people how you know each other etc?

If you don't care, then it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks.

LifeofPo Fri 03-May-13 09:33:36

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

puds11isNAUGHTYnotNAICE Fri 03-May-13 09:57:41

Oh.....was it on a camera Life?

anicenewname Fri 03-May-13 11:42:32

I think it's wrong and should be illegal. It's only still legal because it is so common and would cause uproar to ban. Doesn't make it right.

First cousin marriage in my family, 2 children with a rare genetic disability. They have been told after genetic counselling that the disabilities are a direct result of the inbreeding.

There are plenty of people in the world who you are not closely related to, who are not available to you if you are shagging your cousin. Move on.

But there are millions of people who are closely related who don't have genetic markers for things, and millions who are unrelated who DO. Are we going to test everyone?

Bunbaker Fri 03-May-13 13:06:47

Saggy it just increases the risk, just like smoking increases the risk of cancer or crossing the road without looking for cars increases the risk of being hit by a car.

I don't remember crossing the road being made illegal? AFAIK we all still have free choice. Are we going to make smoking or drinking whilst pregnant illegal?

BigBlockSingsong Fri 03-May-13 14:15:11

Is it really common sleeping with first cousins/distant cousins?

well I've been educated, I thought it was v. rare generally, the OP has disapeared I see,

I wonder if anyone on here is actually gonna condone this, watching with interest,

Fucking grim? Oh get a grip ffs hmm

jahmazing Fri 03-May-13 14:36:00

Get a grip love this is not frowned on but the way I see it not right but each to their own

jahmazing Fri 03-May-13 14:39:23

A friend I have is in this situation each to their own

I have a grip thanks. The response of disgust when faced with sexual relationships between close relatives is very common and performs a useful function. Humans are advised not to have sexual relationships with close relatives for many good reasons. If you choose to flout that you will face approbation and disgust. The thought of fucking someone I'm related to makes me feel disgusted and I think the idea of two cousins fucking is grim. So.

Cerisier Fri 03-May-13 14:51:41

There are plenty of things which are legal but are not a good idea Saggy. Think things through for yourself- just saying it is legal so fine is bizarre.

gillywillywoo Fri 03-May-13 14:53:52

Not illegal but personally I wouldn't go there.

HappyJustToBe Fri 03-May-13 14:58:39

My sibling had a relationship with our DM's cousin's child. I always felt uncomfortable despite legality. I personally think it is too close a relationship.

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