Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.
The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Whacking The Wine Witch Round The Chops (With Barry The Squid).(1000 Posts)
Hello, I'm Mouse
I'm one of the Brave Babes who's travelling on this wonderful, magical, mysterious Bus, trying to hold onto my sobriety for me, and for my family.
I do drink but thanks to this Bus, I've kicked the vodka addiction into touch and the evil WineWitch has been banished far, far away so I now drink in a controlled manner, One Day At A Time.
By that, I mean that just for today, I won't be drinking. Tomorrow, however, I will be because it's a very special occasion. The day after will be dealt with when I wake, and the day after that, the day after etc.....
We're a Bus filled with some fantastic posters, some who drink, some who don't touch a drop ever and some who are on/off drinkers who have lovely warm seats in the side-car, some are hanging onto the roof-rack by the tips of their fingers and trying their best to resist the dreaded WineWitch's charms night after night. But they are trying, and that's all that any of us can do, is keep trying, keep starting again!
So, if you think that you're drinking too much (you probably are) why not come and say hi? We won't bite - unless you ask very nicely, manners cost nothing .
There's lots of seats so pick whichever one you like and have a . Just jump in, we're not a judgemental pack of quiche makers
And here's a bit of light reading for you.... our latest thread and the very first one, the reason we're all here.
FIRST EVER THREAD
Lemony - I knew you meant it nicely just whether or not you thought the docs were fucking me about or I was fucking about at getting them to commit. Thank you for caring xx
Greeny - sounds utterly shite lovely, and it's not a pain competition! Pain is fucking crushing and I hate it. I hate hate hate hate hate living sometimes, I want to die or be put to sleep rather than have the pain I do.
My family, friends and the good things in my life, are the ONLY reason I'm still here and I truly believe that. I know that sounds so 'fucking dramatic' and 'woe is me' but pain is crippling and it is getting worse all of the time.
Nothing helps for long, nothing stops it completely, not forever. I'm so sorry you are suffering xx
Thank you dear Mouse I'm sorry for all you are suffering too. I have thought about driving into a brick wall more than once this week but I never would for all the reasons you mention and for me this is a condition that sometimes goes away after a few years so I have hope for that at least.
Sorry for being so self absorbed today babes - I'm really encouraged to read progress from everyone at the moment - some inspiring and positive stuff going on. For all those at our struggling we'll keep on keeping on - and grabbing the moments when we can xx
Hi to all from my well worn, fat-arsed impressioned seat in the side car.
Been thinking about you and Richard Ma. You are such an amazing sister. He doesn't know it now but, one day, he'll hug you and thank you for being there. Sending a
useless but well-meaning haze of purple strength over the ether for you. (( ))
Feeling rather 'got at' over here just now. The pulled muscle in my back was OK after about 3 days but my ankle is still painful - nearly 4 weeks on.
* I went to the Doc's on Tuesday - 22 days after the fall. Told her that, on the phone, the Nurse Practitioner had assured me that my ankle wouldn't be broken as I could weight bear straight after. "Yes, but" smiled the Doc in a condescending way, "She did tell you to go to A&E if it got worse. She's commented on it in her notes" NO, SHE FUCKING DIDN'T OR I WOULD HAVE GONE!! Grrrr! Doc had a (painful) prod round my ankle, decided it may well be fractured and sent me straight to A&E. Driving up there, I was thinking that, if they plastered it, how the hell would I get home, what would I do with the car, how would I cope on my own for 6 weeks!? Luckily, the x-ray didn't show up any break. On the waiting list for physio. Still limping.
* XP - 9 days late with the maintenance. I had to cancel a direct debit and the phone was cut off for a day. Sigh. I also heard him agreeing, on the phone (DD always has the speaker on?) with DD that me muttering under my breath is irritating! This from the man who gets stressed having them for two weekends a month!
*Next door neighbour (she with the 3 fucking irritating dogs that bark incessantly when they're not in) shouted at my DD who was walking (not poking said dogs in eyes with stick!!) past the back of her garden in the field as DD was 'upsetting her dogs' and sent me a FB message to the same!! Could I tell my DD to use the front instead!? WTF!!
* DSs went to XP and he let them play outside in brand new (Salt Rock) t-shirts and brand new, white trainers that I'd bought them. (I've supplied him with plenty of old 'play' clothes and footwear). He let them (or didn't bother to check) play on farm equipment in the field by the house and they came back with grease and oil all over them and their new trainers!! Fuckwit!
* Got the courage up to phone the surgery. Asked for a message to be passed to my Doc saying "Please can I have a repeat prescription of Campral or, if not, an appointment to come in and see you". Receptionist said Doc would be 24 -48 hours getting back to me. 72 hours and still waiting. Feeling childishly abandoned. Should don big girl pants and try again.
On the positive side:
* Had 2 fantastic days over the Bank Holiday with DC. 2 different National Trust properties - both which the children loved! They've really got into the '50 Thing To Do Before You're 11 and Three Quarters'. Great fun!
* Found a fab hairdresser who (dry) cut my hair for only £13! Wonderful find!
* Found a brand new picnic rucksack in the hospital charity shop (when I went for my x-ray) for only £5! RRP £25! Yippee! Camping/picnic chairs next.
Hugs and strength to all, old and new. (( ))
<waves to mouse > xx
(Sorry, ridiculously long, self absorbed post. Green hope you get some relief from your pain soon. ((x)) )
Purple - I heart you, you do make me laugh at the way you type, you type without 'thinking or breathing'
Sorry for the negatives but yay for the positives! Good to have you back, missed you! xx
Greeny - you and I are so alike with the way our pain rules our lives. Mine increases with weight gain so the fact that I'm heavier is adding to the pain, which means more Oramorph which means more sugar. I'm going to see if there is a sugar free alternative. There has to be!! <weeps>
I know you can't go into detail on the board re your condition but if you ever want to have a pain/disability rant, please PM me xx
Right, I am offski for a glass of wine with my BF and a good old catch up. The deal is, I take a bottle, she provides the giant comfy sofa so I get to chose the wine, and I make sure it's 10.5 to 11%, instead of 13%.
Plus sharing it means two glasses only. It's a treat, not a regular occurrence and the way I feel tonight, I want it to enhance my pain meds and take the edge right off.
I know that you understand that, as do others. I wish I could cure you and get rid of your condition that might improve......... big squidges xx
@ Mouse! Felt like people were just queuing up to piss me off!! ......Annnnnnd....breathe! Enjoy your carefully chosen, well planned, controlled wine, Sweets. xx
Good evening babes xx
End of day 10 - still no alcohol here
Drinking pomigranate, elderflower and diet lemonade tonight
Sleeping better too
Of to watch csi and then early to bed. Very busy weekend ahead - but I will not be drinking
Ambulance again. Paramedics wouldnt take him to A and E as he would just get sent home again without psychiatric help. Said to get GP. GP wouldn't come as he wasn't the on call GP. Phone on call GP. She said to send him to A and E....
She eventually saw him and said he needs to stop drinking! No fucking shit, Sherlock. Said she will see him tomorrow if he is sober. He might be dead by tomorrow. No-one will help him, will help us. He is dying.
Oh ma sweetie, I'm so sorry. I Truly do not know what to say, it just seems so wrong
Ma! This is desperate. How can this be allowed to happen? I naievely thought we had emergency admissions for this sort of crisis all over the country. Have you tried calling The Samaritans? Or even AA? - do they have an emergency helpline? Sending you every virtual support.
Hi all firmly at front of bus this evening) nice place to be for a change..
Busy day today with work always helps to have a distraction. Need to keep strong for the weekend.
Ma sounds truly awful re brother situ. Useless GP! He needs the help this second. REally hope something positive happens tomorrow. Are you staying with him tonight?
MA said this before & ignore me if I'm prattling on about something you have tried but have you phoned the crisis team at your psychiatric hospital? Thinking of you & your family, situation sounds awful
Ma, is it possible that you and your family could 'bend' the truth a bit? Awful, I know, but if the authorities thought he had tried to finish it all would he get seen by someone? It seems to me, from what you've written before, that the weekend is even more difficult to get anyone to pay attention. It's utterly despicable that you and Richard are in such dreadful position without any medical support. The Doc said she wouldn't see him unless he wasn't drunk? But, at his level of drinking, surely, if he just stops in order to fill her criteria it could be very dangerous/lethal? Another thought (sorry if they're crap ideas, just trying to think of anything that might help) possibly alluding to the problems for the people that have turned you away if anything does happen to Richard. There would be an investigation into why he didn't get any assistance, surely?? Possibly legal action? Obviously, you wouldn't do anything if it would put them 'off-side' but I'm not sure you have anything to lose on that front right now.
On a far, far lower level to you and Richard's situation, I tried to get mental/medical help for my 14 yo DS. I knew there was something really wrong but was told by another mother that who'd been in a similar position, until the police are involved (i.e. DS had committed a criminal act) I would get nowhere. She was right. He's been in prison several times - and has just been diagnosed as Bi Polar.
All through this, I'm pretty sure a drug addict would get far more support - and an addiction is an addiction so they should all be treated the same.
Please post again soon, if you can find the time, we are all thinking of you and hoping against hope that you can get someone to listen and take action.
Love and hugs. xxxxx
* that the weekend is even more difficult to get anyone to pay attention....therefore that makes today even more urgent. *
ma I'm so terribly sorry for what your going through, sending you warm hugs and I hope things get better for you and your db, how sad he must feel. mouse and green I'm sorry your both suffering pain, i hope you both feel better too, love to purple you make me smile and to all my lovely babe friends and new and old, have a great day x x x
Ma - I am absolutely gobsmacked that you are being phobed off like this still. If he's sober? How the fuck is an alcoholic going to be sober? He can't get out of bed or off the sofa without a drink inside him. Stupid woman.
You need to get past the GP/A&E bit now and I agree with Purps on this one, you need to say that he has tried to take his life because HE HAS
He IS drinking enough to kill himself and doesn't care if he does.
It is heartbreaking reading your posts but this is real life, THIS is what alcohol can do to you. THIS is what happens when you hit rock bottom, alone, desperate,............
Regardless of the fact he has you and your mum, in his head he is alone and you don't 'get it'. You don't, can't understand because you're not him.
I'd call the police and say that you have found him threatening to kill himself, he wants to die and that you are worried that he is now at the point where he will do it after being let down so many times.
You need a crisis team, someone, anyone to help. I just don't know where to start to help you and wish that we were all up there with you, but please know that I'm in your pocket, just sitting and snuggling next to you, being a Mouse has it's advantages, oh but can you not put your keys in there again? Tehy hurt
Ma - this has to stop today, and not because he has killed himself, but because someone has sectioned him, this is a Mental Health Crisis centre number - 0300 5000 927
And you can contact MIND - HERE
I'm sorry but I have to go, I'm with you in spirit in your pocket and hope that you get some help. I am so shocked by all of this xxxxxx
Ma This is an extract from N.I.C.E Clinical Guidlines - Alcohol Disorders document
Diagnosis and clinical management of alcohol - related physical complications.
1.1 Acute alcohol withdrawal
1.1.1 Admission to hospital
188.8.131.52 For people in acute alcohol withdrawal with, or who are assessed to be at high risk of developing, alcohol withdrawal seizures or delirium tremens, offer admission to hospital for medically assisted alcohol withdrawal.
The last paragraph is your brother - in black and white. I don't know if this is any help. Someone must have a duty of care in this case. (Talking out of my arse again but....).... Have you thought about consulting a lawyer? Most have free half hour sessions.
Searching around to see if there is anything else.
Ma, some good advice from the ladies, I can feel your frustration in your posts and my heart goes out to you
Ma I work in mental health services there is a place called Windsor clinic in liverpool that treats alcohol dependency as well as mental health problems I know it's not in your area but I could get the number and you could phone them and maybe they could point you to the services in your area ? Just a thought x
It is a specialist service your brother requires and not all in patient mental health units have facilities for alcohol dependence please pm me i could ring for you and try And get some answers for you if you require my love goes out to you and your brother at this trying time the help is there somewhere x
Sorry not been around, not been feeling too good but am reading everything and just wanted to say my heart goes out to you ma
Unfortunately the NHS is under so much pressure that its often the people who shout longest and loudest who get seen. This is really hard on you as his nearest relative, I don't know what to suggest other than keep phoning his GP or try the Mental Health crisis team.
Ma definitely time to kick some butt with this. (Not that you're not kicking butt, but the butt needs kicking a bit harder now).
Your brother can be admitted via A&E if you take him there or call an ambulance. If you say that he's tried to kill himself, all the better. You could also say (if this is true) that he's vomiting all the time, can't keep anything down etc. Has he had any falls? If so, you can call an ambulance and say that he's had a fall, is not responding to you very well...
Maybe you can get round it this way. Good luck. It's a toughie. x
Ma I called Windsor clinic and they are going to get back to me with any help that might get your brother seen to. Hope you don't think im interfering but thought Might be able to get an answer the initial advice I got was the go wrong in telling him to stay sober for the appointment far to dangerous hang in there il try n help if you want my num that's fine i have numbers for services that will help u they are in Edinburgh don't know if this is near you or not
Alcohol problem service 0131 537 6444 out of hours num 0131 537 6797
Alcohol liaison service base at Edinburgh royal infirmary 0131 242 1396 ring even if not in ur area coz they may be able to put u in the right direction hope this helps you can have my num if u need any advice
There both impatient services that treat withdrawal as well as dependency x
Hi MA this is the link for the Ritson Clinic based at The Royal Edinburgh Psychiatric Hospital Edinburgh.
It may give some information and be able to point you in the right direction. Can not believe how unhelpful bordering on dangerous negligence your Gp has been x
This thread is not accepting new messages.
Please login first.