Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

Insulting online dating emails.

(43 Posts)
fluffitmore Sat 27-Apr-13 09:00:44

Not the ones that are sexual, or the ones that are just rude, but the ones that are sexist, entitled and insulting. Over the last 24 hours I have had:

- what meal do you cook when you are wooing a man.
Fucks sake, theres a assumption im going to cook like a 1950's housewife to get you to like me, NO.

- what are you planning to do this weekend, shopping?
No you dick, please dont sterotype and besides im not 20, spending all day giggling over shoes is not my idea of fun.

- Im not sure of my plans yet but if i am free ill email you and you can meet me.
Right, ill just sit in on the off chance that happens then shall i?

The more i date the more morons i end up encountering.
Please share your awful messages to make me feel better.

Stinkypoos: you can report him to the police or at least to the relevant dating site.

Stinkypoos Mon 29-Apr-13 01:20:18

Little Pea Pod

Don't worry, I'm fine now about my stalker. At first it freaked me out but after 5 years you get accustomed to it.

For nearly 6 years now I've not replied but I still get these emails from him every now and then, he'll send a load and then they stop. I feel sad for him. He is obviously very lonely and I think needs help. I imagine him being a very possessive boyfriend and likely to react very badly to a break up.

It scares me that of all the men that contacted me, he was the one i thought seemed normal.

Hissy Sun 28-Apr-13 13:10:17

I don't think so, he was in the UK. Sad to think there is more than one of these 'blokes' isn't it.

have a <sqidge> anyway Mosman, you need it! smile

Loulybelle Sun 28-Apr-13 11:05:08

Yoni, dont it make ya wanna spam Mr Market Harborough, wonder how he feels about gay men.

StuffezLaYoni Sun 28-Apr-13 10:34:55

I'm properly amused by Mr Market Harborough and all the people here so have been contacted by him! What a knob.

Mosman Sun 28-Apr-13 10:26:00

Hissy - his handle wasn't Getusmiling was it ? That sounds exactly like my Stbex

WeAreEternal Sun 28-Apr-13 09:33:27

A good friend of mine does a lot of online dating.

Some of the best stories she has told me;

A man who messaged her, but then refused to chat until she sent him more picture that 'proved' she was the one in the pictures on her profile. He wanted at least one picture to include some kind of note held up to show that it was really her.

Another man who seemed normal at first, but if she didn't reply straight away to his messages he would spam her inbox with 'helllooo are you there???' 'Why aren't you replying' 'helllllooooo' 'are you there??????' 'Are you ignoring me???' 'Why haven't you replied yet??' Are you ignorant or something??' 'Heeeeelllllllllooooooo'
After she told him she wasn't interested he sent her 45 of these type of messages before sending her something obnoxious.

There was also a man who insisted he loved her and wanted to be her boyfriend after only a few messages, he stalked her online for ages. It was creepy.

Victoria2002 Sun 28-Apr-13 09:12:16

A friend of mine (after trying match and plenty of fish) is on 'forget dinner' it is outrageous and has been the source of many nights with the girls laughing and drinking wine setting up fake profiles and reading messages out loud to each other-I totally recommend it!

Flipper924 Sun 28-Apr-13 09:08:46

Mr Market Harborough is doing the rounds this weekend! He's messaged me twice (didn't like the fact that I ignored the first message). Think I might have to explain why I don't want him anywhere near my profile!

Hissy Sun 28-Apr-13 08:52:49

I had a message from a guy through OK cupid.

Told me he was married, but up for late night conversation and communication.

I deleted the tosser, but was so tempted to send him a link to Relationships to pass on to his wife and request her email address, cos I bet I had more in common with her than I'd have had with a sad pathetic tosser like him.

Deleted my account right there and then.

LittlePeaPod Sun 28-Apr-13 06:34:33

So I was speaking to DF about this thread as some may know from earlier post we met on an online dating site. He was on dating sites longer than me (4 years on/off) before we met. He said he got his fair share of interesting dates. He once went on a date and when he got there he discovered "said lady" had used her daughters picture as a profile shot. He didn't recognise her until she approached him in the bar. hmm

He also went on another date and the "said lady" burst into tears halfway hrough the meal about her ex and that she still loved him. DF is such a nice guy. He felt really bad for her and he sat listened (for about 3 hours apparently) gave male prospective advise, paid for the meal/drinks, made sure she got a taxi safely before taking himself off.

And last but not least apparently he used to get lost of emails from call girls that used the sites to find custom. He said for every 3 normal emails 1 was from a call girl. I never even thought about that till now! But he too says his glad he stayed on because he met some lovely ladies/had some lovely dates and we are together.

Stinky really sorry to hear about your stalker experience.

Stinkypoos Sun 28-Apr-13 01:30:39

My stalker (over 5 years now) discovered me via internet dating.

The worst thing is I thought he seemed the most normal of all the people who got in touch with me.

I think there is a code with keywords you use if you are into weird/alternative stuff. I think you need to be careful on your profile with the words you use.

I heard the Guardian site was ok so directed my sister that way.

We thought scat was a type of music!
I've heard success stories but I would be very cautious if I tried it again.

issey6cats Sun 28-Apr-13 01:09:52

the funniest insult i had was on POF i have shoulder length hair in a bob and the message i got was "your having me on your a bloke aint you" all i can think is that a lot of cross dressers wear wigs that look like my hairdo and no i aint a bloke all woman me lol

StuffezLaYoni Sat 27-Apr-13 22:59:28

It'll be Jim! On please tell him RedWineDrinker says hi....

toothgenie Sat 27-Apr-13 22:35:27

I've been contacted this evening by a guy from Market Harborough who admitted in his message that he's married! I don't know his name because I've blocked him, but 'Forsaking all others' obviously doesn't apply to him.

StuffezLaYoni Sat 27-Apr-13 21:29:06

What?? I feel debased! I no longer feel special!

OiVaVoi Sat 27-Apr-13 18:32:26

Stuffez: I too have been on the receiving end of Jim from Market Harborough!

LittlePeaPod Sat 27-Apr-13 18:28:28

I've not read your profile, do ya fancy slammin.

Ha ha ha ha Brilliant....... grin

DionFortune Sat 27-Apr-13 18:18:30

I was on POF and had just started chatting to DH (to be) when I got the message;

"I've not read your profile, do ya fancy slammin?"

shock

ItsYoniYappy Sat 27-Apr-13 18:16:13

YoniYappy

Online dating isn't for lesbians?

[sigh] I think you know the answer but will be nice.

I did not realise the site I was on was for lesbians. Many apologies for not typing everything exactly so that no-one could nit pick at it. smile

Mosman Sat 27-Apr-13 17:26:43

I've had some lovely guys contact me from okcupid I feel a bit greedy keeping them all to myself.
Match has been a whole different story though

Hissy Sat 27-Apr-13 16:57:36

I had one this morning..

WOW, I thought Dolls like you were only in my dreams, how did you escape? hmm Do you remember we are due to get married tomorrow and I've already bought you a wedding gift; a ball and chain so you don't wander too far from the kitchen. shock

I can't remember the rest of the email, and have naturally deleted it.

WTAF do these idiots think they are doing?

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

I don't think the 'what are you doing, shopping?' email was particularly insulting, just someone trying to make conversation. The rest are pretty rubbish though.

ALittleStranger Sat 27-Apr-13 15:15:53

I've never had a sexist or insulting message.

But then I've never had a cock shot either so I'm starting to think I forgot to set my profile live.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now