Not so where to start but hoping you lovely ladies can talk some sense into me.
I'm hurting lots at the moment due to some serious crossed wires and I can't shake the feeling that I've been misled.
When I got together with my dp, 20 months ago I was very upfront about my desire for marriage and children. He shared these feelings.
Recently we have been looking into houses, a family home so to speak. This combined with other things has led me to believe a proposal was in the air.
To summarise:
*5 months in he told me he wanted to propose
*8 months in he admitted a proposal plan had been scuppered by an unexpected visit from my mother.
*1 year in he told me, unprompted, that it would most likely be within a year.
*at a romantic dinner we were discussing it and I mentioned the fact I would like to use a family ring I have inherited (a mother of pearl one) but it was a little in the small side. I suggested I could use it to help motivate a fitness campaign. He told me to tell him when it fitted.
*snuggled up in bed he told me "I want you to be my wife, in fact that's how I sometimes catch myself thinking of you"
I realise I am going on a bit so I'll get to the point. Last night he asked me whether or not I thought our wedding would be like a mutual friends. Two hours later we've finished planning our wedding; except for the date. I am feeling brave so say "all that's left is the date". Silence. Tumbleweed. Random question about what we are having for lunch tomorrow. I am floored but take a deep breath and go to bed.
Big chat tonight. He's not ready, not sure he believes in marriage as an institution but has offered to make a will and go to the solicitors to sign whatever it takes to become legally entwined and be next of kin.
I am so confused and can't stand to look him in the eye. He has been married before and I know this taints his view. He has said "I might wake up tomorrow and think it's a great idea". Equally he said if I asked him he would seriously consider it. I thought it was a case of when not if!
How on earth do I get over my disappointment? I'm also cross that he would say all he has said but not be sure now. I can't help but think something has changed. :(
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Relationships
So confused :(
ThinkyPantsWorryWort · 11/04/2013 01:15
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