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Is he load of rubbish?

(106 Posts)
number41 Sat 23-Mar-13 12:22:10

I have nambe changed for this, sorry.
I met this bloke about 5 years ago. We hit off straight away, very passionatelly, I liked him a lot, he was chatty friendly and funny. But there where a few things that where very odd. He had lots of money, in cash in his house. And he spent it without thinking it. Of course this at the start of a relationship is fun, went out for dinners, good wines, etc. but as I wanted to get serious I started to ask why he didn't have a bank account, where did the money come from, etc. He told me (after a long persona/family/past history) that from a young age he started being involved in music industry, writing lyrics, and ths is what made him the money, he had a little part time job to "keep him in real life" hmm. Now, of course I searched googled etc. he even told me famous songs he had written. He was nowhere to be seen. One night I was at his and the door bell rang. It was his sister (whom with he had no contact) drunk, shouting at him at telling him it was crazy. I didn't hear much more that that. At the time he was very close to his mum. After a lot of thinking more questions and digs, I just didn't see it clear and I stopped contact.
Until now.
Met him again, we hit off again, the connection and chemistry is quite mind blowing. The story has changed a bit, he says he lost all his money on the crisis he has a full time job and bank accounts like normal people but he doesn't speak to his mum anymore. So we start seing each other again as naively I think he might left the odditty and mad stories behind. But its not the case, he keeps saying that he did all this stuff when young but he hated it, hated "the industry" and the way he was treated to produce money. i have researched again, the songs he says he has written are NOT on his name at all, but another famous songriter mainly. BUT, there is some song lyrics that do make sense with the past he has told me about, but of course he could be completely mental and built a big lie based on what these songs say.
There more this stuff started coming out again, the less I want to see him and now we only send the odd text to each other. But I do miss him.
Sorry this is long and it might be lots of info missing so I didn't dripfeed but I don't want to make the post even longer and messier.
But basically, is he full of bullpoo and a compulsive lier, or is it possible that he did have this weird past and he has wiped himself out from all the media...
Please dont be too harsh, I am not naive, I really like his personality and I am just hoping he is not barking mad... sad
So what do you think? WWYD??
Thanks for reading.

number41 Thu 28-Mar-13 22:05:11

Money laundering...
I just do not care anymore.
Even without the money issues he has become a bit odd since I stepped back.
Not in a bad way, he is trying to be funny and sounds mad.
I am done.

nkf Thu 28-Mar-13 21:49:51

Crime?
Sponging off someone?
Something really dull so he makes this up.
Probably drugs though. Often accounts for loopy behaviour.

number41 Thu 28-Mar-13 21:45:06

Unfortunatelly I will see him around, but I think he will realise I've just had enough

number41 Thu 28-Mar-13 21:40:57

For some reason I don't think its drugs, I have been in the "party" environment when younger and this didn't sound/feel like that at all. This is a small community and he has done a great job with his son, lovely lad doing brill at school. I just think he is deluded and mad.

Mumsyblouse Thu 28-Mar-13 21:11:27

They'll be drugs at the bottom of this, for sure, I bet he's coked up and his texts make sense to him. Well done for walking away, you need to protect yourself.

Pigsmummy Thu 28-Mar-13 21:06:52

Can you afford a few hundred quid to find out? If so a PI would sort this in no time.

number41 Thu 28-Mar-13 21:01:35

He is not only a load of rubbish but also a weirdo. I was feeling lonely two nights ago and I texted him (I know shock ) and fair enough he was out playing pool but he sent the most strange messages back, and finally I felt properly freaked out.
So I am glad to report that that's it. Not contacting sisters, not contemplating the idea that there is some logical explanation to it all. I do not feel like talking to him again, let alone be with him!
So I actually feel relieved and ready to move on grin
Thanks to all of you that gave me support at the right time.

number41 Tue 26-Mar-13 18:14:06

he drove past me before and gave me a masdive smile snd enthusistic wave even tho I havent texted him for two days now hmm

WhatDoesTheDogSay Tue 26-Mar-13 17:55:49

Sorry, my mistake re. the sister. Still think it's best just to leave it, but it's up to you. If you do make contact, I hope you get some sort of answer and are able to put it behind you smile.

number41 Tue 26-Mar-13 13:42:24

oh gosh I read the last message as I had her profile open ready to fire. I chickened out and now she will see that I looked at it shock
well I will never stop wondering if I walk away not knowing...
This sister diesnt hate him, they just dont speak and reading between lines of what he told me her husband had confronted him about the things he says... So I always thought that if he was a liar she would warn me. She sounds ok.

WhatDoesTheDogSay Tue 26-Mar-13 13:30:40

I don't think you should approach the sister, number41, and I say that out of concern for your feelings. It may not achieve anything, she may not even know who you are and so not reply or give anything away. Even if she does hate him, he is still family. She might also tell him that you had made contact, which could give him reason to either be angry with you or think that you must still be hung up on him or both. Best just to walk away and put it down to a lucky escape. Know it's frustrating, though, to not have unequivocal proof that he lied, but does it really even matter?

number41 Tue 26-Mar-13 09:02:13

But if I say thst she might think, well he is in his right to be vague. Wouldnt be easier to tell.her what he has told me so she can tell me if its complete bullshit or not?

mumof3wilts Tue 26-Mar-13 08:46:33

Maybe say something on the lines of he's been very vague about his life and you want to know more about him and wait to see if she says anything about the song writing?

number41 Tue 26-Mar-13 07:35:54

Just been thinking on asking his sister while lying in bed thus morning, but how? what do u tell her without freaking her out? I will write to her first on LinkedIn and tell her if she prefers to meet? I dont know I guess I am expecting her to be as secretive as him.

mumof3wilts Tue 26-Mar-13 06:55:40

I would deffo have to ask his sister, i couldn't walk away not knowing, my ex used to make up stories that i think he thought impressed me but instead i thought knob!

mumof3wilts Tue 26-Mar-13 06:47:50

Brian McFadden has pretty much lived in Australia since leaving Westlife?

GlitteryShitandDanglyBaubles Tue 26-Mar-13 06:28:26

oh love. I'm sure you'll find someone much, much better.

number41 Sun 24-Mar-13 16:08:08

I have always seen him for what he.is, I was just hoping that there could be some truth in it... 5 years ago I run away as soon as the stories became weird. This time round things seem more normal, he has a job, normal amount of money in the bank and his son lives with him. The first weeks I avoided the subject but as soon as we talked about it and I saw that he says the same stories I msde distance again... and the I wrote here, I knew what the answer was going to be but I missed him and I had a tiny weeny spec of hope that maybe there was an explanation for it. I know there isnt and I am grateful for all the comnents here.

WhatDoesTheDogSay Sun 24-Mar-13 12:58:20

That's the thing, number41, everything he's ever told you could be complete bullshit. Hard to get your head around, but sounds like you're now seeing him for what he really is. It's worrying that there seems to be a not inconsiderable number of folk like that around, going by the advice and experience of posters on your thread!

number41 Sun 24-Mar-13 06:58:37

Glittery, see that could all be bullshit too! but yeah I am not thinking on getting back to him

number41 Sun 24-Mar-13 06:57:23

Buddy and TheSecondComing, that made me grin

GlitteryShitandDanglyBaubles Sat 23-Mar-13 23:37:55

Hmm.

His sister hates him. His mum has changed information in family photo albums to 'protect him.'
His sister has a history of drug abuse. He paid for her rehab.

All the bullshit aside, I would walk away. You'll regret it if you don't.

PelvicFloorClenchReminder Sat 23-Mar-13 23:30:14

Gary Sparrow from 'Goodnight Sweetheart' claimed to have written most of the Beatles back catalogue, is he maybe some kind of time traveller?

TheSecondComing Sat 23-Mar-13 23:22:21

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Buddybutters Sat 23-Mar-13 22:04:48

Well now I'm tending to believe him. Surely if he was bullshitting he'd have picked someone other than Brian McFadden?!

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