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what to do?

(41 Posts)
RubixCube Tue 05-Mar-13 02:00:58

Dp invited some bloke i don't even know to sleep.My house is tiny.His roaming about upstairs.His making wierd noises.one minute i can hear him move about then his snoring.My dd is very shy,so if she wakes to go toilet and see a man she doesn't know in there she will be terrified so now i have to keep awake.No doubt theres puke all over the bathroom as i can hear the bath being banged against every now and then

RubixCube Tue 05-Mar-13 09:02:56

If i dissapear.It's because i've zonked out on the sofa,not ignoring people

Morloth Tue 05-Mar-13 09:05:42

Tell him that is it. It will never happen again.

If it does, you will be packing the kids up right there and then and leaving.

Or get used to it, because he isn't unhappy with the current situation, you are.

I know what I would do if DH lost his mind and did this.

'just remember, no is a complete sentence' that mn mantra has helped me many times.

RubixCube Tue 05-Mar-13 09:08:29

That's the thing he knows he will always get away with it as i have nowhere else to go sad

RubixCube Tue 05-Mar-13 09:10:32

So i'm just going to practice.No,Sorry this mine and my kids home not a doss house

RubixCube Tue 05-Mar-13 09:18:29

Thanks for listening.Need to go now.Feel sick,probaly stress.Be back later

Littleturkish Tue 05-Mar-13 09:29:49

Is this a house in both of your names?

I would be asking him to leave.

Your partner does not respect you.

Morloth Tue 05-Mar-13 09:39:22

It might be really really hard to leave.

It might seem almost impossible.

But decide where your line in the sand is, because it sounds like he doesn't really care how you feel.

RubixCube Tue 05-Mar-13 11:02:05

well i've spoke to him sternly about the risks.He was shocked when i told him his mates was upstairs and told me he doesnt know why he would be upstairs as he showed him where the toilet was but that he wouldn't anything his known him for years and has kids of his own.I reminded him of the April Jone's case and the fact he had kids of his own too.I said it was a huge risk to have someone in our house with kids in it when parents are asleep.He also said his friend will not be staying tonight or any other night

RubixCube Tue 05-Mar-13 11:02:55

*do anything

TisILeclerc Tue 05-Mar-13 11:41:34

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

No, Sorry this mine and my kids home not a doss house
Don't be saying sorry either!
Good sentence but leave out the sorry.
You need to use a more assertive tone.
Glad it's sorted out for now but don't put up with it again.
Just say NO!!!

I think perhaps you are getting needlessy frightened that your P's drunk mates intend actual harm to you or DC. And it would have been very unlikely indeed that (presumably teenage) girls brought home by your P's son in the past would have been a danger to you or the children, as well.

However, the fact that you don't like unexpected guests is something your P should be taking notice of: your feelings are just as important as his are. Is he generally selfish? Does he do his share of domestic work, treat you with respect, is he fair with money?

RubixCube Tue 05-Mar-13 12:33:09

Hi SGB what worried me with the friend was he was moving about upstairs and he had no reason to be up there as theres a toilet right next to the living room.No dps not fair with money but he has started sharing money when drunk that he has won.He hads never ever done that before he always kept it for himself.I only have the money for my phone contract.No money in my pocket

TisILeclerc Tue 05-Mar-13 18:42:06

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ImperialBlether Tue 05-Mar-13 20:10:09

No kidding. Do you work outside the home, OP? Is your husband respectful towards you?

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