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Hey, it's the Dating thread... number 37

(1000 Posts)
lubeybooby Sun 20-Jan-13 00:04:11

Of we got - all dating chit chat here!

superstarheartbreaker Sun 20-Jan-13 10:55:53

Isn't it odd how they don't want to meet? I rekon most of them are attached and use online dating as a bit of extra curricular fun :-(

mercury7 Sun 20-Jan-13 10:57:20

I have found the same, on dating sites few men manage to secure any actual meetings...I think thats because women are rather wary of meeting 'strangers from the net' and there are more men than women looking for casual relationships, women can pick and choose, men come away empty handed.

Alot of the men on dating sites behave like chimps...which makes women disinclined to actually meet themgrin

48howdidthathappen Sun 20-Jan-13 10:58:53

Nomore Go you smile You seem to have your brain engaged so just enjoy.

Scooby That is fab! A very successful day grin

Arse Woo hoo! Mr OZ is a painter. I used hope he would one day do a nude of me blush Very erotic.

Fay Sorry things didn't work out, at least your choice.

Dolly Hope Mr Slow picks up some speed.

My news more of the same. I am getting boring. Another fantastic shagathon with Mr R&R. We are addicted to each other. I am feeling the love lust grin

mercury7 Sun 20-Jan-13 11:00:39

I've not found that men dont want to meet....quite the opposite most of them are very keen to meet, but if they dont suggest it straight away I assume they're just after online flirting and not continue communicating.

I've never been the one to suggest a meeting.

mercury7 Sun 20-Jan-13 11:02:11

48 it sounds fab...lucky you and himgrin

48howdidthathappen Sun 20-Jan-13 11:08:09

Mercury Agreed in my limited experience they all want to meet ASAP. I don't get into sex texting with what are after all complete strangers.

I never suggested a meeting either. That might have something to do with my age! Others have with success.

VelvetSpoon Sun 20-Jan-13 11:18:28

My experience has been there are quite a lot who have no intention of meeting, or who suggest meeting and then once you've said yes disappear (leaving you thinking wtf was that about?!) tbh I find the ones who obviously have no intention of anything more than online flirting less annoying than the vanishers, and in turn the vanishers annoy me less than the cancellers (who bail on a date with a day/few hrs notice, never to rearrange).

All this reminds me what I hate about OD!

mercury7 Sun 20-Jan-13 11:33:42

I dont really get annoyed by cancellers & vanishers, I just think 'ah, he revealed himself, if thems his true colours I dont want to meet him anyway!'

I dont have any particular expectations of people I encounter via OD, all just ships that pass in the night...it takes time to properly get to know someone

VelvetSpoon Sun 20-Jan-13 11:43:45

I am a bit Pollyanna, I generally expect people to be nice, and treat me with a certain amount of courtesy, as I do them - ie I always hold doors open for others, about 50% of the time I don't get that back. No big deal but a little irritating. The cancellers irritate me at a similar low level (annoy was probably too strong a word). Plus the cancelling thing does grate because, as I am often not around to do daytime dates, they always end up being in the evening, and a late cancellation results in me spending a free evening in on my own. Not the end of the world but does leave me a bit peeved!

Nomorepain Sun 20-Jan-13 11:52:45

He hasnt text me this morning and now my cool thoughts have melted!! Arghhhh should I text him or does that make me a sap. I fancy him. Hate his situation but found him quite a hottie!!!

Scrazy Sun 20-Jan-13 11:56:27

Place marking. Nothing much to report here. Got a couple on POF that I chat to, one I had a two dates with a while ago but we are chatting about POF and who he has met, it filled a couple of hours up on a lonely ex bday Saturday night. Doubt anything will come of either.

Wrt to asking a guy to meet up, I wouldn't, personally. If they want to meet up they will ask and as others have said sometimes bail on the actual date that they appeared to want.

Still hidden on POF but might make a new profile with photos when I feel ready which might be never the way I'm feeling sad. It's taking a while to get over ex but hey baby steps and all.

VelvetSpoon Sun 20-Jan-13 11:56:59

Nomore, who sent the last text?

If it was you, I'd wait.

If he sent the last one, then you can text, but I'd give it another hour before
doing so.

although frankly given my own complete lack of success i am not sure it's worth listening to my advice!

48howdidthathappen Sun 20-Jan-13 12:02:44

Nomore Radio silence. Keep your cool. It has only been one date.

Nomorepain Sun 20-Jan-13 12:15:48

Last text was him saying goodnight.

Scrazy Sun 20-Jan-13 12:24:42

Wrt to texting, Lubey linked to a great flow chart once. Can we have it again, as a refresher.

If he sent the last goodnight text then you can send a good morning/afternoon one if you want a reaction.

48howdidthathappen Sun 20-Jan-13 12:25:57

I would still wait. If a he wants to contact you he will.

From what you have said, he already has a lots of demands of his time.

48howdidthathappen Sun 20-Jan-13 12:30:20

Sorry for all the typos. Knackered blush

mercury7 Sun 20-Jan-13 12:38:09

i prefer intermittant flurries of texting..24/7 ping pong is just too much, as for good night and good morning texts, well i just find that too intrusive

VelvetSpoon Sun 20-Jan-13 12:40:27

I love good night and good morning texts.

So long as I don't spend too much time thinking about how many other women they are sending them to!

lubeybooby Sun 20-Jan-13 12:49:21

ahaha! I'll find the flowchart... brb

lubeybooby Sun 20-Jan-13 12:50:52

Here we go. Should I text him?

Scrazy Sun 20-Jan-13 12:55:10

I cannot stand men texting me all day either. It's nice to have a flurry when you have time.

Good night ones are acceptable if I have just been communicating then say I'm off to bed.

Thanks for that Lubey.

mercury7 Sun 20-Jan-13 12:56:42

perhaps dating site profiles should specify the level of textin that a person is comfortable with..ranging from sparse to blanket coverage grin

Scrazy Sun 20-Jan-13 13:02:08

Just a thought, I wonder if there is an male equivalent 'should I text her'. It would go something like this.

Do you like her? Yes, go for it. No, don't do it.

Bloody men, they seem to hold all the freaking power even in 2013!!

And as this thread goes to show, any form of 'rules' is pointless because we're all different. One person will like lots of texting, another won't. Some women refuse point blank to ask a guy out, some have no problem. Some men are wankers and only interested in sexting, some men like to get to know someone by email for a while before asking you on a date.

We can all overthink. We can all do far too much second guessing. Should I do this? Should I wait for him/her? All we can do is go with what feels right for US at the time.

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