Another name change after he 'found' me here again.
Over 2 years separated after 15 years of an abusive relationship and there are still days when I just despair.
His contact with the children is court ordered but he has an OW and an estranged mother back on the scene who are cheer leading his attempts to paint himself as the poor victim. He lies, he denies, he rewrites history.
He is utterly vile in court - he represents himself after falling out with a string of solicitors. He emails my solicitor constantly - 3 times a week on average. Aggravating for extra contact, complaining about property, complaining about not being answered quickly enough. He has alienated the school, social services.
He found out I was going to the Freedom program - it corresponded with one of his contact visits so he started to refuse to bring the kids home to babysitters - meaning I had to give up.
I've had 'counselling' with Womens Aid but because he is still so actively trying to control, it ended up being fire fighting his latest antics. I've read Lundy -I know 'why' he does it but I don't know how to cope.
OW is pregnant and rather than leaving me alone and focusing on that, he seems to have upped the ante.
He refuses to engage with my solicitor with regards the actual divorce and I am trapped in a situation where he pays the mortgage on the FMH as it is significantly less than the maintenance he 'should' be paying. If I don't play ball, he stops the mortgage payments.
I regularly have police patrols passing the house as it's on a high alert list. I am trying to hold down a stressful job and I'm starting to make mistakes there
I dread opening my emails. I don't even go to court hearings any more because he is so hostile.
I don't even know what I'm trying to say. But I'm so very, very tired. My physical health is awful but I'm sure it's all just stress related.
I just want it to end. but will it ever stop as long as the children are still kids?
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Can I ever truly escape an abusive man when I am the mother of his children ?
40 replies
MeaninglessStrife · 10/01/2013 22:29
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