Mumsnet Talk

Update op?

amy there's a thread in Chat right now, here, that might be worth a read. It's light and fun but lots of us have posted about how we feel after having left the bastard. Have a read and think about what you want to feel like in one, two, five years.

Then you know what you must start working towards, love

Get some professional advice and take it from there x

I want to be happy, for me and my kids.

That's what I'm afraid of still feeling this crap for the next fifty years.

amy please don't stay with a man like this

he hates you, he doesn't love you

you are just a mug for him to come back to when his approaches to OW fall on deaf ears

that woman you don't even know saw through him, you can too, and even though you know what he is like you would still let him stay ??

see a solicitor love, if your house has been adapted for your dd's disability, he can be made to leave if your relationship has broken down

it will be hard, but it is doable

tbh though love, if all you can manage to do is get pissed and carry on listening to his crap....you will still be this unhappy and broken this time next year

Don't scare us like that, amy.

maybe evven wrap it himself this time!

hes being apolgetic now taking about getting me something nice for xmas

i thought he had as he used a phrase i had written on here, but he hasnt said anything else

i'm ok he wont hurt me, im not scared of him, that was a one off

He is a twat--why do you think he has found this thread...

But anyway

hello Mr any175. I hope you have had time to read and digest all that has been written here. you truely are an apology for a man. You are a liar and a cheat who does not deserve to have a wife and family.
I hope Amy gathers some support and gets the strength to throw you out as soon as possible. She might want to get herself an STI check cause l am sure you have not been faithful to her.
She deseves someone so much better than you--you deserve nowt

Amy,are you ok?Phone someone in RL straight away...a friend or family member...and let them know NOW what's happening.

I was going to say, before the bit about him not leaving that his refusal to acknowledge that he has done anything wrong and blaming you has to be the last straw. At least if he was begging forgiveness, blaming himself, saying he was going to change, suggesting counselling, you would have something to work with.

He just want you to deal with the DC, do the housework and shut the fuck up. He just wants to do whatever he wants. Please get yourself some advice.

Are you safe, amy. Can you call someone? I'm really worried about you.

i think he has found this thread

i dont think he wants to tell his family or friends

he is refusing to go. i can't leave as our house is done for our disabled daughter

I think your last post would be the deal breaker for me without the rest of it. He is not showing you any respect whatsoever.

and now i'm turning into an alcoholic, i'm on my second glass now.

by not going he is forcing me to stay with him

and he wasn't there for me when i was in hopsital, he rarely visited but had time for the gym etc. and when i came out in a back brace i had to do all the housework staright away, even the day i came out which was way too early but i discharged myself as my kids needed me. should have been in for much longer.

he is getting angry and upset and refusing to leave when i asked him to tonight. he says he wants it to work and wont go.
I am not sure i want to try again, he seems to want to blame me for not being there for him (even though i have broken my back in a horrid accident and spent loads of time in hospital, had a child run over and had another very poorly) over the last year. so this is the reason he did what he did. so my fault. Its my fault that he cant keep it in his pants

he's a liar. admitting to the least he can get away with.what a shit...

he still says he hasn't been unfaithful because the other women didn't want to. As far as I am concerned, the fact that he wanted to is enough. He was unfaithful in everything except the deed. Do you think he would sleep with her now if she asked him too? Or someone else if the opportunity arises?

Also, he doesn't help you enough, he has hit you, he lies and hides things. Perhaps the other woman saw him for what he is. I'm rooting for you to get rid, get happy and move on. If you do decide to stay, please make sure that he at least has some boundaries, agrees to more housework and does it, gives you access to all passwords and codes, agrees he has done wrong and that you are allowed to not trust him.