Note: Mumsnetters don't necessarily have the qualifications or experience to offer relationships counselling or to provide help in cases of domestic violence. Mumsnet can't be held responsible for any advice given on the site. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

Omg!!!! I've just found out

(164 Posts)
Stopthepidgeon Sat 17-Nov-12 16:15:18

Okay - so following on from my should I should I not track my cheating husband thread .....

He has taken our dc out to visit his parents - and left his computer open

I am dumbstruck to find out he has secret savings in excess of £1 million!!

This is not a stealth boast - I am in total shock

lovelyladuree Sat 17-Nov-12 21:36:13

Does he need an expensive mistress? I am available for weekdays and occasional weekends.

Bogeyface Sat 17-Nov-12 22:22:55

Oh and check your "downloads" file in your browser too as that holds onto things for ages unless you clear it.

ImperialBlether Sun 18-Nov-12 00:33:39

I don't know whether to feel sorry for you or really happy. How much did you think he earned? What did you think the balance would be? Was there one large lottery win type payment or had he been saving for years?

SucksToBeMe Sun 18-Nov-12 00:43:22

Great that you found out op! You are in a much better position , whichever outcome you choose.

MmeLindor Sun 18-Nov-12 00:51:58

Don't do anything daft. Get your solicitor to deal with it.

showtunesgirl Sun 18-Nov-12 01:03:47

My DH has just conjectured that it is very strange that he has got this amount of money in one place only. Either he doesn't really know what he's doing as usually you would spread it around and not have it sitting in one account OR this is just the tip of the iceberg and there is A LOT more than one million in other places...

Cahoots Sun 18-Nov-12 01:09:09

It would be odd to have £100000 in a bank account all together. I would think you would normally have a bit here and a bit there,some in Isas, some in shares, some in one account, some in another etc, etc. I am not saying this to suggest that the OP is lying more that it may indicate the OP's DH is doing something odd????

Cahoots Sun 18-Nov-12 01:10:08

Oops, bit of a cross post.....

exexpat Sun 18-Nov-12 01:15:41

OP didn't say it was a bank account - I would guess it's more likely an investment portfolio held with a broker/financial advisor. And that wouldn't time out after ten minutes either, in my experience. Perfectly plausible.

unlucky67 Sun 18-Nov-12 01:24:28

I'm with showtunesgirl and cahoots - unless it is paying a really great interest rate...you wouldn't keep that kind of money in one account - not covered by the FSA £85k guarantee ...also you would have as much as possible in an isa (unless this an isa?)
Also that's above the inheritance threshold for a couple ...£650k ....would make sense to get some in trust for children etc...looking at £140k inheritance tax just on that money alone...

Must be up to something dodgy - or he is a bit of a fool....

showtunesgirl Sun 18-Nov-12 01:25:40

Good point from exexpat.

unlucky67 Sun 18-Nov-12 01:25:46

sorry cross post - and see you are right exexpat....no mention of one account...

BOFingSanta Sun 18-Nov-12 02:53:04

So he's a bit tight, yes? To the tune of squirreling away a grand a week for twenty years? I think not.

ImperialBlether Sun 18-Nov-12 10:28:16

At the same time, it's not a really BAD thing to find out, is it? Finding out he was overdrawn by thousands without telling you would be much worse.

How much do you like this millionnaire?

Abitwobblynow Sun 18-Nov-12 10:34:24

Forensic accountant, Pigeon!

Stopthepidgeon Sun 18-Nov-12 11:22:10

To the disbelieving few ...... at what point did I say this amount was in a bank account I had seen online? Exactly. I didn't. ! I merely said that I discovered information this on his computer.

To be quite honest I have enough crap to be dealing with in my RL to have to quantify myself to thOse few if you who are on here for purely entertainment purposes.

I have had some very good advice from many kind people on this thread - thankyou for that.

Stopthepidgeon Sun 18-Nov-12 11:23:05

Rant over!

And - yes - sincerely thankyou for that kind advice xx

Stopthepidgeon Sun 18-Nov-12 11:24:59

abitwobbly - what is a forensic accountant, exactly?

BadLad Sun 18-Nov-12 11:27:55

It's someone who looks at accounts to discover how they differ from what the financial position should be, for the purpose of, amongst other things, uncovering financial fraud.

Perhaps your husband has been helping one of these Nigerian princes move his money out of the country by temporarily lending them his account. And here was me thinking they were scams.

BlameItOnTheCuervHoHoHo Sun 18-Nov-12 11:31:13

I keep looking to make sure I've read it right and that it isn't a debt - its not a debt as I've seen a statement of him making regular payments into this account

This is where you said it was an account.

Tbh, I don't know what to advise. I didn't think anyone was disbelieving though hmm

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

cozietoesie Sun 18-Nov-12 11:48:31

Calm down Stopthepidgeon. I don't think anyone was disbelieving you. More trying to work out what your husband was up to. And realizing that you were in a state of shock so might not have appreciate the full significance of what you were seeing.

smile

ThatVikRinA22 Sun 18-Nov-12 11:56:07

i think in your position i would do nothing other than get evidence, as much as you can, photographic evidence is good, have you got hte bank account number, who its with etc?

then i would talk to a solicitor.

i saw your other thread but didnt read it all - but it seems he is very good at keeping secrets and its clear from your last thread that you dont trust this man - no wonder.

Do you want to be with him?
what is he doing to right his wrongs?

i would be very wary, i think if he can keep secrets like this i would never trust him again. its clear that following the affair he is not being open and honest with you.

MmeLindor Sun 18-Nov-12 11:56:13

Pidgeon
No one accused you of lying, they were making you aware that it was odd to have that kind of money in a normal account, and that your DH could be involved in something really dodgy.

Presumably you have a high household income, otherwise even being very careful with money would not be enough to save that kind of cash secretly. Do you know how much he earns? Did you never notice that he is earning more than you are spending?

Or has he saved a lower amount and invested it, which could mean there is other investments somewhere else?

Londonista1975 Sun 18-Nov-12 12:00:30

I'm with Justfabulous - something about ths sounds iffy to me and I wonder if he's playing some kind of game with you. It seems beyond stupid to leave his computer and go out knowing you're around and see all this secret stash online.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now