I have recently found out that my Dads cancer has returned and we are waiting on test results to find out whether it has spread. The results are due any day and I've told DH that I'm very nervous as we don't anticipate good news.
My dad has a family from an earlier relationship who hold resentment towards me for being in his life and refuse to acknowledge me. Earlier this evening DH took it upon himself to start giving me what he termed "friendly advice" over how I should handle these people going forward. It basically consisted of telling me that I need to be more forceful in confronting my dad over their behaviour, something which for several reasons I am unwilling to do. The conversation upset me and I made it clear to DH that I did not welcome what I perceived as his criticism of how I'm handling the situation and that I did not want to talk about it anymore. This was all said in a nice enough way and we both moved into another subject with no hard feelings.
Shortly after DH decided to start asking questions about a free event that I am getting him into via my line of work. With it being a free event and somewhat of a perk I have not been able to confirm when he will be able to go. It's narrowed down to 2 dates and I've always made it clear that I wouldn't know until the last minute when he could go. Other relatives of mine are also going and accept that they need to be on standby to go on either of the dates I have given. My DH has decided that he isn't happy to not know what is going on and would not stop going on at me about it. I've told him the situation many times but for some reason he seemed to expect me to give more concrete details. When I said several times that I was unable to confirm he started getting shirty about being left hanging etc. I've no idea why he is making an issue of this and I told him so. I also told him that with what I'm going through with
My dad I really don't care about this event and frankly I couldn't give a toss when people go. He took umbrage at this ( he seems to think he is doing me the favour by going ) and started having a bit of a go at me. To my dismay I began crying (all of this whilst walking home together) and ended up shouting at him that I wish it was him with cancer and not my dad.
I'm utterly ashamed at having said it and of course I don't mean it. But I'm very stressed by the situation and I really don't need my DH giving me shit over this bloody event, which incidentally I will not even be in the country for. I have since tried to apologise to my DH but he won't have it and will not speak to me.
Am I being unreasonable or is he bring an arse?
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Relationships
I lost my temper with DH
Autumn12 · 10/10/2012 22:04
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