Why is it when you have a baby, everyone else turns into a baby?

[Jac1978]

Since I had my DD, my relationships with other people feel more strained. My husband is wonderful and helps so much but he sullks if I ask him not to go to evening football matches after work when I've had her all day and I'm tired. The grandparents all want a piece of her. My mum is obsessed with my DD. She is round all the time and hogs my DD so I can't get near her. If other people are round she gets grumpy if someone else wants a hold. Whenever we want to buy DD something she jumps in and buys it first. She even gives her sweet things when I've asked her not to and she has a strop if I ask the inlaws to babysit and not her. My MIL keeps moaning that she doesn't see enough of DD and that DD doesn't know her but she's welcome to visit when she wants. She comes at least once a week and yes sometimes DD doesn't like to be held because she's tired, hungry or restless bur MIL takes it personally which is ridiculous as DD is only 7 months and still just a baby. It makes me feel tense if DD doesn't "perform" in a way that makes MIL happy as I know I'll have to keep reassuring her. I just feel bogged down by the egos and neuroses of those around me when all I want to do is enjoy and care for my DD.

[CogitoErgoSometimes]

So enjoy and care for your DD and give others' egos short shrift. Personally, I found that motherhood made me far less tolerant of other people's stupid behaviour rather than more and I have no hesitation in expressing myself. Become 'Tiger Mummy', stick up for yourself and your DD, and tell them all to sod off. They'll back off when you do.

[porridgelover]

What cogito said....

Absolutely, you are the mummy. How many evenings is DH out to football....well you either get the same number to go out to evening classes, run, whatever and/or he minds all day Sat and Sun is family day.

Babies change dynamics in relationships all round. Stick up for you and her.

[cestlavielife]

set your boundaries and stick to them.
in terms of time allocated for diff family members with dd, and time for you/h to have "time off" to do your own thing