Not sure about this.

[Baubles68]

I work with 7 women and 1 man. I sometimes have a sandwich with one of the women and the man and we'd arranged to do this on my birthday. We don't socialise or anything outside work. However, the man couldn't make it. When I went into work, I found a chocolate birthday cake on my desk in a carrier bag with a note saying "sorry I couldn't make it". No, this man never usually remembers anybody's birthday or buys anything for anybody. I didn't feel that I could say to the rest of the department who had bought it so said it was from me. I probably know the answer to this already, but do you think it is normal for a married male colleague to do this. Would your husbands buy their female colleagues a cake or is he just being friendly?

[JoyceDivision]

Hmm, I don't get alarm bells ringing here. If he was trying something, there's a lot more discreet gifts to leave at your desk, eg a tiny jewellery box! A big chocolae cake isn't really being sneaky! He might just appreciate you being a nice person to natter wioth and pass the day. You could be sen as a stand in bloke!!

Irt might be that his wife told him to takeit in? I've sent dh in with cakes for his colleagues if I know they get on well, as they make his working day more bearable.

[fuzzynavel]

Why couldn't you say it was from him? It was a chocolate cake for god sake and it was your birthday.

Maybe you're seeing too much into it for your own reasons, do you fancy him?

[bubblechristmaspop]

A man you usually lunch with platonically, sends in a cake, apologising for not making the pre planned birthday lunch.

The issue is?

[LoopyLoopsWoopDeWoops]

He sounds nice, it all sounds fine.

[sternface]

No, wouldn't read anything into this at all.

[ScarlettIsWalking]

Wow you really are reading into this. He was being polite!

[bubblechristmaspop]

Why have you over reacted here op? This is a guy you have been having platonic lunches with for ages, no?

Is it you who is hoping for more with this married man?

[JoyceDivision]

I'm really sorry, but re-freading your thread has really made me laugh, you're reading flirtatious tones to a cake dumped on your desk in a carrier bag?

[TooEasilyTempted]

He's just not that into you.

[bubblechristmaspop]

Ahhhhhhhh but what carrier bag was it? That will tell all

Op come back don't feel silly. You all thought we were going to man bash the married, chocolate cake buying, carrier bag handling, cheapskate Milk Tray man didn't you?

I probably know the answer to this already

I think it would do you good though to think why you'd think such a gesture by a friend/colleague who had to call of a birthday lunch was inappropriate.

[JoyceDivision]

I'd be more oikely to just have the bag left on my desk with no cake. And poss a note asking me to keep it on my head

[MarinaAzul]

Sorry OP, but your thread has made me laugh so much. A man doesn't have to do much to make you think he 's coming on to you, does he?

[squeakytoy]

He works with seven women for heavens sakes... he was making a kind gesture, not trying to get into your knickers!!

And there is every chance that this man had mentioned to the others he had got you a cake because he couldnt make the sandwich sharing, and you now look a right muppet too if you have told them that you got it for yourself!!

[Malificence]

It's exactly the sort of thing my DH would do because he's a nice, friendly and thoughtful person who likes (most of) the women he works with.

[springlamb]

I should think if he had any ulterior motive thang going on he would have said something like 'sorry can't make our sandwich lunch, how about meeting me for a drink in a hotel bar later on'. Maybe I am a little slow picking up vibes....but I pick up no vibes from a chocolate cake other than he doesn't mind if I get fat and spotty, cos he's my mate, and only my DH should be worrying if I get fat(ter) and spotty(ier).

[AbbyAbsinthe]

Blimey. He was just doing something thoughtful!

[ninah]

I think it's code for anal sex

[Gay40]

Dump him. Why should you have to put up with this treatment?

[Malificence]

ninah!
I hope not, DH took a load of chocolate mince pies in for his lads yesterday - his boss asked him to save one for her. .

[Bogeyface]

So you are one of 2 women he gets on with at work, which must be hard difficult for him in an all women office. He obviously values your friendship and wanted to let you know he was wishing you a happy birthday. I am sure (sorry if this pisses on your ego a bit) he would do the same had it been the other woman too.

He sounds like a nice thoughtful man who was grateful to have found a couple of people to be friends with and you are in danger of ruining that if you keep reading too much into it.

The trouble with MN is that men are either on the make, already cheating or wife beating cunts. The idea that there are genuinely nice men out there is.........well, akin to accepting that dragons live at the bottom of the garden :o

[Bogeyface]

Malificence, I think that chocolate mince pies means that HE will be the reciever and his boss is marking his card so she is the giver :o