my best mate asked me if wanted a threesome with her

[cantstandthenoise]

Last night out with my best mate, she'd has a skinfull, some random bloke started chatting to us and then suggested a threesome! She acted like I was really uptight for saying no! I feel our friendship is really one sided and this is like the final straw - she ended up going back with him and I think the only reason she wanted me to was because she thought he wouldn't be interested otherwise.

[ShowOfHands]

I'm not sociable enough to understand the point of threesomes. It's just another person to make small talk with. I'm too misanthropic for adventurous sex.

[violetwellies]

Three is definitely a crowd, eyeuk.

[cantstandthenoise]

I wouldn't on so many levels - I only have sex with one person that I like, I'm not into women and she's my best friend...

[electra]

She doesn't sound very mature!

[cantstandthenoise]

well she'd not young! (both of us in our forties!) - she thinks I'm really uptight - I think this is going too far by most people's standards.

[Hullygully]

Is she hot?

[cantstandthenoise]

'Is she hot?' !!! that's a bit irrelevant isn't it?!

[MaryQueenOfSpots]

So how long has she been your best friend?

Does she have some redeeming qualities?

[usualsuspect]

Tut ,Hully beat me to it

[bringbacksideburns]

You're not uptight! Why would you want to watch your mate having sex with some random. I couldn't think of anything more off putting!

[HecateGoddessOfTheNight]

If you're not into that, then you're not into that.

If she is a good friend and you like her and value the friendship, then talk to her about how uncomfortable you felt and how important it is that something like that doesn't happen again.

If she values the friendship, she will respect that.

[electra]

I'm guessing she's not hot because otherwise the OP wouldn't have thought she wanted to have a threesome just to keep the guy interested.

[Portofino]

Cor some people have a more exciting social life than me!

[rycooler]

It's taking your duty as a friend a bit far isn't it - it's one thing being there for her when she's feeling down, but having sex with her??
I would have laughed out loud.

[DontGoCurly]

Euuuuurrrrgh!!! Boundaries crossed, can of worms opened, taboos broken all over the place!!!

I would have to cut contact OP. If she is prepared to have sex with you just to get some randomer into the sack then she has serious problems. She sound desperate and she wants to drag you down to her level.

[twotesttickles]

Your friend clearly wants to shag you. Sorry but if she wasn't interested she would have clearly down the bleuuurgh face. So you have two things to deal with....the fact she has a crush on you and the fact that she's a bit of a slapper.

Oh and yes you are totally uptight, so much so your knickers don't fall off instantly nightmare

[GeneralCustardsHardHat]

Never ever do this kind of thing with a friend or a long term partner, it'll only end in tears!

[twotesttickles]

Last time a woman suggested something like this to impress a man in front of me I called her on it, snogged her and ran off cackling while she reeled.

[cantstandthenoise]

by the way I have heard absolutely nothing from her since and she's supposed to be my best mate. I haven't contacted her as I feel really awkward. Maybe she does too or maybe she just thinks I'm uptight

[cantstandthenoise]

just feel sad about it - that's all

[QuintessentialShadyHallows]

She is probably covering up her own embarrassment by calling you uptight. She is normalizing it to make you look weird rather than her, upon realizing you were not keen.

Make light of it.

[SolidGoldVampireBat]

Well there is nothing wrong with threesomes, if you like them. If you don't like them, there's nothing wrong with that, either. It's possible that your friend is not contacting you because she has fancied you for a while and is hugely embarrassed and hurt that you turned her down. Calling you 'uptight' could have been a reaction to feeling hurt; you know her better than randoms on the internet do.
Or she could have been showing off and being silly, and has now decided that you are 'no fun.'

[cantstandthenoise]

our friendship goes through ups and downs. Often we're in contact loads and often it's weeks in between. I don't want to lose her as a friend but she often treats me like a bit of a mug and this time I feel it's overstepped a line. So I want her to be in touch first.