My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

They don't like it up 'em!!!

8 replies

thisishowifeel · 15/05/2011 23:20

A weekend of MY friends, saying how wonderful IIIIIIIIII am.....shit, a few pints later, I'm mad, I'm a pathalogical liar. TWAT.


BLAAAAR....BLAAAAARRRRR

He even knows what his therapist thinks of me...


NO HE DOESN'T...MORON!!!!!

Therapists don't pass opinions on someone they've never met. full stop.

This was the first time my friends have come to our home. So there's some way to go then?????

OP posts:
Report
bleedingstill · 15/05/2011 23:28

can you clarify a bit?

Report
thisishowifeel · 15/05/2011 23:35

He's in therapy because he is emotionally abusive. He's been in therapy for about a year. Womens aid said it usually took two.

Big step forward in that WE entertained MY friends this weekend, for the first time ever.


Hmmmmmm.

Roll on therapy day.

OP posts:
Report
DooinMeCleanin · 15/05/2011 23:35

Who had the pints him or you? Grin

Report
SpringchickenGoldBrass · 16/05/2011 00:21

Wouldn't just getting rid of him be easier?

Report
thisishowifeel · 16/05/2011 07:58

I am having some kind of melt down I think. I have re-started therapy. The weekend was illuminating as I found out a lttle more about the sheer extent of my older sister's hatred and jealousy of me. It's impoosible to marry up the person my family saw, and the person the world sees, and God knows where h lies on that scale.

I have never had the confidence to invite my friends here before.

I have realised just how much I don't trust my h, I don't believe loving someoe is something you say, it's something you do. This is all still so raw and I am hurting so very much.

It's all so complex, maybe I should just scuttle back to the Stately home?

OP posts:
Report
Anniegetyourgun · 16/05/2011 08:20

It's actually quite simple.

Family treat you like shit. Thus you grow to believe you are shit, so when husband treats you like it, you don't even notice for a while, and when you do you accept you probably deserve it.

Since the fact is that you are not shit, sooner or later you will come in contact with other people who also notice you are a human being and treat you like one. This makes you think. You tentatively take off the shit-tinted spectacles and... oh look, the world is quite nice in places, and so are you!

Pity the poor buggers who look at you and see shit, for it means their eyes are awash with it.

Report
Anniegetyourgun · 16/05/2011 08:21

Remove "also" from "other people who also notice", sorry.

Report
thisishowifeel · 16/05/2011 08:41

The two ends of the scale are so extreme though, I simply can't get my head around it.

And the more people told me how wonderful I was, (and they did, and again this weekend a lot, I had no idea of what people used to say) the more they 9my family)would hate me and seriously, literally try to destroy me, and have my kids taken from me. They spent years doing this. The full extent of their obsession with destroying me is only recently becoming clear.

The horror that was my first marriage is only now becoming clear too, and the collusion between him and my family. It's horrific. They tried to suck current h in, and succeeded to an extent, but not completely, but I cannot trust him anymore, and saying he loves me just isn't enough. It's left me over needy.

I actually can't cope with it all.

Annie....thank you.

OP posts:
Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.