Just before christmas dp and I decided we didn't want to live togther. he was very controlling,w ouldn't let me decorate or buy things I wanted or anything and he was also dishonest about a lot of things so we split. After we split we started getting on so much better so to cut long story short we said we'd go back to dating but live seperately. He told me all the time we were apart he missed me, realised it was me he wanted and he loved me etc. I've recently found out that during the few weeks we were apart he was speaking to other women on a dating site and trying to arrange a date with a girl from work. I let it go because officially we were split up at that point but still, he can't have been missing me that much?!
So anyway I've noticed that when he comes down to see me he's really protective of his phone, one day he shoved it in the car glove box before he came into the house which he's NEVER done before. When he gets a text he makes sure he doesn't open it in front of me and I can tell he's really uneasy about leaving the phone around me when he has to leave it like when he's going to toilet you can just tell he wants to take the phone with him but realises it looks odd so doesn't.
Last night I told him I'd broken one of my pc chargers, he was all willing to help saying he'd come down and fix it. I said I wouldn't be in all day so I'd pop it down to his house. He didn't like this idea and started making excuses before eventually saying it probably can't be fixed anyway. I pushed it just for the sake of wondering how far he'd go to get out of it and it ended with him more or less snapping at me to be there at 6pm. I just KNOW at some point during the day he'll text with a "o just remembered I won't be in later ....."
You'll ask me why I'm bothering but when things are good they're really good, I just can't get it out of my head that something isn't right 
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
This isn't going to work, is it?
atomic1981 · 12/05/2011 07:34
Of course it's going to work. You said it yourself, when things are good, they are really good and that's all that counts. There may be other women but it sounds like you are the special one and ultimately, he will realise that. He is just confused, there are probably childhood issues that makes it difficult for him to bond with you and he is responding by pushing you away. He was only making your life miserable out of despair, deep down he does love you.
Yes it's going to eat away your self-respect, dignity and sanity, but if the good times are good, what can you do?
GL dumping him. 
Good post Ciske. My brain was not quite switched on and when I read it at fisrt I thought 
Then my brain caught up 
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.