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The kind of men that single mothers attract...

(92 Posts)
catinboots Wed 29-Dec-10 21:59:04

Before I start, I am in a great relationship with a fab man and am getting married in August!

However, I was a single mum for a long time and was chatting about this today with a friend (another single mum).

I had DS1 aged 19 and met my DP at 28. We now have DS2 (9mnths). In the nine years it was just me and DS1, I had a sucession of arsewipe boyfrienda. In hindsight I can see similarities between them. They all were in need of 'mothering'. Not in a good way either. In a lazy-fucker way.

I remember my best friend saying something to me once about a certain boyfriend - - - "it's a certain type of man who goes out with a single mum. They know that if you're already wipeing one arse, it makes no difference to wipe two!!" So very true about lots of men I think....

catinboots Wed 29-Dec-10 21:59:44

** I was 19 when I had DS1 - he is not 19!! Just 11!!

GypsyMoth Wed 29-Dec-10 23:41:16

could turn it around to the kind of men single mothers are attracted to?

WundaWumman Wed 29-Dec-10 23:50:21

Completely agree! I've been giving this quite a lot of thought recently as this seems to be the common theme running through ExP's previous girlfriends... it all makes sense now. Though I should say that I still love and adore him, the 'mothering' was the main thing that led to our demise - I could only be responsible for so much ("Perhaps it would be best if you book your own doctor's appointment as you know when you will be free" hmm)

StuffingGoldBrass Wed 29-Dec-10 23:50:26

Some undesirable men think that single mothers are more likely to be desperate for a man in their lives than childfree women, therefore single mothers are more likely to put up with selfishness, laziness or even abuse just so as not to be single.
Unfortunately, some single mothers are utterly desperate for a man and therefore will put up with a lot of crap.
ON the other hand, some men who date single mothers do so because they are attracted to a particular woman who happens to be a single mother. Or, occasionally, because they love DC but are firing blanks themselves.

BreakFree Thu 30-Dec-10 00:25:58

So I'm fucked then. Gone from a cheater and con artist to a domestic abuser. next man I'm with will be firing blanks? wink

BreakFree Thu 30-Dec-10 00:27:33

I'm doomed so. Cheater to domestic abuser to next bloke firing blanks? What an adventure my life is!

Snorbs Thu 30-Dec-10 00:32:18

Indeed. There are men who will target single mothers because they think they will make a lovely home for them to cock-lodge in. Just like some women will target wealthy men for much the same reasons.

Meh. There are going to be arseholes around no matter what your life looks like. But that doesn't mean that everyone you are going to meet will always be an arsehole.

CheerfulV Thu 30-Dec-10 00:49:38

Well put, Snorbs.

maypole1 Thu 30-Dec-10 00:51:05

It because they think your easy, I was a single mum but I have just. One child mu friend has four by four different men has no idea who number 1father is has no clue were number 2&3 father is and number 4 father is in jail she dosent work and hasn't done for years

Sorry ladies but even as a former single mum myself she is not exactly bringing a lot to the table expect children not sure what type of man she expects to attract

She is currently with a man. Who has 8 children by 5 diffrent mothers who he never sees .

Also I find that a lot of single mothers can be very desperate and I think a low life can smell it on you
When I ask my friend why she dates the loser she says because who's gonna want her with with 4 kids

I was single for six years because I was not willing to waist my time or my los time with loosers already made a mistake with my ex

Just my view on it and my experience with my sigle parent friends

earwicga Thu 30-Dec-10 00:52:54

Snorbs, that's because I've met your share as well as my own of arseholes.

Given up on the lot of them after the last relationship fizzled away. There's seriously no fucking point. Life is lovely and balanced when I am single.

Snorbs Thu 30-Dec-10 00:59:01

Tell me about it. I tried internet dating for a while but the only women I seemed to meet either spent all their time slagging off their exes, asking lots of probing questions about how much money I had and/or drinking themselves bandy. Life is a lot easier single grin

maypole1 Thu 30-Dec-10 01:02:06

Stuffinggoldbrass you put it much better than I could

You are not doomed if your a single mum but you have to follow some rules

No men around the kids unless you are sure it is ending in living together or marriage

Because their are only so many uncle johns a child will put up with

Do not be having or think about having anymore children, we know how un fun being a single mother is with 1 ex don't allow it to happen a second time babies should only be considered in a long term relationship

Any woman who will have a baby for any Tom dick or Harry is easy and will be treated as such

If they have a number of children of which they don't have any contact I would be very wary about their ability to parent any child if they don't have contact with their own

Never blow out your own child for a man if a man feels you don't put your child first he won't either and won't respect you as a mother

earwicga Thu 30-Dec-10 01:04:38

What you chatting about maypole1? 'don't allow it to happen a second time babies should only be considered in a long term relationship' - WTF is this shit? How can anybody possibly know if a relationship is going to last. Are you 15?

earwicga Thu 30-Dec-10 01:06:31

Snorbs - I never even got that far. Only so many messages that one can receive saying 'Hi' or the additional bonus of 'nice pic' before you turn the sodding profile off.

TwoIfBySea Thu 30-Dec-10 01:11:11

I became a single mum at 35 and am not attractive in any way so haven't been beating them off with a stick. In some way it is a relief as most who do seem to want to date single mums are looking for a mum not a relationship!

It would be nice but perhaps being alone is the safest option.

TwoIfBySea Thu 30-Dec-10 01:11:11

I became a single mum at 35 and am not attractive in any way so haven't been beating them off with a stick. In some way it is a relief as most who do seem to want to date single mums are looking for a mum not a relationship!

It would be nice but perhaps being alone is the safest option.

maypole1 Thu 30-Dec-10 01:12:58

Earwicga my friend who has for is currently seeing a man with 8 children he docent support any of them and docent have any contact.

They are currently planning to have a child now I am no mystic meg but I don't think he's going to stick around for number 9 he has no interest in her children and they have no plans to move in

And
Deep down most women know when their dating a looser you only need to read some threads woman who have a badden but stubble only any way then next think you know their pregnant

maypole1 Thu 30-Dec-10 01:14:54

Twoifbysea have you tried dating a single dad who is the main carer for his children.

That way their in the same boat as you

maypole1 Thu 30-Dec-10 01:16:04

Sorry ladies about the spelling using a I pad and not got the hang of the keyboard yet

tingletangle Thu 30-Dec-10 01:35:01

I think it is about the vibe you give. As a single mum I had fantastic boyfriends . When you meet me it is clear I will not put up with shit so I tend not to attract it.

FaffTastic Thu 30-Dec-10 03:34:33

Maypole - think you might only be casting your opinion about your friend as opposed to judging that all single mothers think/act like that?!?

tookoolforskool Thu 30-Dec-10 10:09:40

what a load of rubbish.

Sorry - but it is.

Of course, there will be men that are like that, and of course, there will be females that are like that.

Nothing to do with being a single parent, and everything to do with what kind of person you are.

Maypole, i agree with fafftastic.

StuffingGoldBrass Thu 30-Dec-10 10:32:13

Maypole, I don't think we agree at all. For one thing, there is nothing wrong with being 'easy' eg enjoying sex without insisting on commitment. TBH that's often a much better option for a single mum who has good babysitting arrangements: have a bit of fun now and again but don't move the bloke in. And while there are a few silly women who think that every new relationship should be celebrated by getting PG, there are a lot more who are too trusting for their own good, get PG because the bloke swears he'll stick around and are then left lumbered when he fucks off to impregnate someone else.

ANd while there is still such immense social pressure on women to be owned by a man 'form committed relationships' this crap is going to go on and on: single mothers are so stigmatized that it can make them desperate for a man, any man - and when you're desperate all you attract is abusers, parasites and predators.

SantaIsAnAnagramOfSatan Thu 30-Dec-10 10:36:03

think this is bollocks. if you're desperate for a man you will get arseholes and put up with them. if you felt the need to have a succession of shit boyfriends as a single mother that was your issue not theirs.

find this a bit offensive tbh. single mum's are a diverse group and not all of us are desperate for boyfriends - if you are of course there'll be consequences.

i haven't had much time or energy for boyfriends since becoming a mum and certainly not for a string of shit ones.

SantaIsAnAnagramOfSatan Thu 30-Dec-10 10:37:48

in fact the whole title OP of this thread is like a stereotype bs headline.

wish you'd delete it.

Janos Thu 30-Dec-10 10:44:24

As a single single mum this thread naturally drew my attention .

There's some truth in this. If you are desperate for a bloke (and sexes reversed of course) you are going to be a magnet for unpleasant types. But then that doesn't just apply to single mums.

OTOH, single mums are often independent minded and have busy lives. Such qualities can be very attractive.

ninah Thu 30-Dec-10 10:47:08

agree with santa
if you want shit stereotypes about lone mothers buy the mail

Janos Thu 30-Dec-10 10:52:07

Must say there seems to be an assumption that all single mums are desperate for a man, any man, which is pretty insulting.

The truth is, many (most?) are quite happy as they are thanks very much - and while having a man about might be nice it's not the be all and end all.

superv1xen Thu 30-Dec-10 11:05:14

<watches thread with interest>

i have some friends who were single mums and have seen them settle for some real cocklodging lazy twats who couldnt give a shit about their DC. but maybe they would have gone out with twats anyway, single mum or not, you never know.

SantaIsAnAnagramOfSatan Thu 30-Dec-10 11:12:26

there are desperate women everywhere who put up with twats. it's not single motherhood that made them that way.

mind you there might be a correlation between the two because many single mum's get there by way of having sex with a twat.

i feel a bit sad when the whole focus is on finding a man - you have a child, you're a mum, you are a family - enjoy it. you've got your whole life for relationship drama not long to enjoy the precious early years of your child's life.

GypsyMoth Thu 30-Dec-10 11:15:07

actually,as a single mum who used to be married to the biggest idiot around,i've become rather picky!!!

not desperate.....have learned to do my own diy etc .only the best will do

BreakFree Thu 30-Dec-10 13:51:18

Yes I agree Santa, I am hoping to get out of an abusive relationship with the father of one of my two children. It has been many years of a shit time and I just want out no. I would hate to believe that I am only going to attract loser scumbags forever more when I do decide I'm ready to date again. Doesn't give a girl much hope this thread!

HappyHECmanay Thu 30-Dec-10 13:57:41

Surely it doesn't matter who is attracted to you, only who you are prepared to allow into your life? Responsibility lies with you for the person you choose, surely? You don't have to have them.

BelleDameSansMerci Thu 30-Dec-10 13:59:32

Utter bollocks, IMO. Since becoming a single mother, I've only had interest from much more "suitable" men than I was previously attracting. I am a bit older than most of you (at 45), I expect, but I'm attractive, independent and don't need a man for anything except a loving relationship. I can't imagine tolerating any stupid arse man who couldn't look after himself properly or treated me badly.

Perhaps people (not just single mothers) get what they expect?

ValiumTinselton Thu 30-Dec-10 14:37:57

It depends how desperate and needy the women are, not whether or not they're single!

I've been single ages and not one single arsewipe has come into my radar. I wouldn't be interested in an arsewipe.

ValiumTinselton Thu 30-Dec-10 14:38:38

BelleDame+1

BelleDameSansMerci Thu 30-Dec-10 14:44:33

Hec & Valium grin

DilysPrice Thu 30-Dec-10 14:45:23

I actively pushed my highly eligible male friend to consider single mothers on dating websites on the grounds that he's sterile so it seemed like a good fit - not because he particularly wants to be a father, but because childless women in their thirties were more likely to see sterility as a negative factor. Was that wrong?

(In the end of course he's found a (lovely) childless woman, who I assume either doesn't want kids or likes him so much that she isn't put off by sperm donation.)

happybubblebrain Thu 30-Dec-10 14:55:15

This is a completely ridiculous thread. Catinboots you are obviously too lazy to think. No further comment needed.

gettingeasier Thu 30-Dec-10 15:02:52

Er yep I agree with happy and not sure why if you are getting married etc you started it tbh, hope its not an early attack of smug marrieditis

ValiumTinselton Thu 30-Dec-10 15:44:39

Janos, agree, I find it quite upsetting to think that people out there must assume I'm desperate for a man, any man.

I left one man who wasn't good enough for me. I don't need that again. If and when I ever end up with anybody he'll be much nicer than the average 'dp' because I have such high standards and tolerate no bad behaviour.

SantaIsAnAnagramOfSatan Thu 30-Dec-10 16:06:41

ah!!! lightbulb moment!

thank you gettingeasier!

ValiumTinselton Thu 30-Dec-10 16:51:46

Yes, because she was a single mother but she's presumably not like those other single mothers....?

StuffingGoldBrass Thu 30-Dec-10 16:57:57

I don't think it's inaccurate stereotyping to say that some single mothers are desperate for a man and therefore tolerate a lot of crap. Some people (in any social group) are desperate for couplehood and therefore only attract losers, parasites or abusers.

BelleDameSansMerci Thu 30-Dec-10 17:16:15

But, SGB, that's true of single women in general, IMO...

BelleDameSansMerci Thu 30-Dec-10 17:16:51

I mean, as true of single women as of single mothers, if you see what I mean.

RumourOfAHurricane Thu 30-Dec-10 17:24:06

Message withdrawn

UnlikelyCrackerzonian Thu 30-Dec-10 18:38:00

I am not sure about the 'dc must never meet a bloke/bf unless it's a long-term relationship' idea. I really do.

I mean, that would just be pretty unfeasible for me. I am not suggesting at all that you drag a bloke into bed and be in bed with said new man when dc comes into the bedroom in the morning...not saying that atll.

I am just saying, I do want ds to be able to see me form friendships with men and that men sometimes come round for a drink.

I dont know if that's damaging though tbh.

I simply cannot find childcare at all regularly enough to get any kind of 'relationship' of the ground in the first place. If a chap can't come round to my house for a glass of wine because he might meet ds, what the hell do I do?

It's all speculation and figurative anyway as I haven't met anyone and doubt I will.

It still bothers me though - the 'HE MUST NOT MEET DC UNLESS YOU ARE COMMITTED' stuff:
it seems old-fashioned and totally unrealistic to me.

Also, I am very happy single. Cannot imagine a man moving in on my tupperware, laundry and fucking it all up by putting it in the wrong place.

ninah Thu 30-Dec-10 18:41:49

there is a school of thought that says you should introduce quite early on, as if the relationship between the man and the dc is not right it has no future anyway
Personally i have friends of both sexes so were I to meet anyone dc would not have to be flabbergasted at a Man in the House

UnlikelyCrackerzonian Thu 30-Dec-10 18:43:43

Sorry for typos....my premise means of course, that I don't want a committed long-term relationship anymore. I don't...so where does that leave me (and I am sure many many other sinlge pmums like me) with the 'should I introduce ds to the short-term bloke I am seeing' question ?

Would be interested to know how other single mums in the same position manage it with their dcs.

ninah Thu 30-Dec-10 18:45:06

see below. have a full social life with friends from all walks of life and sneak the odd bf in among them. well, odd as in occasional ...

earwicga Thu 30-Dec-10 19:36:31

UnlikelyCrackerzonian - that was an exageration by the poster, but there is an element of truth in it. I've had 3 serious relationships in the last 9 years and my children got attached to them all - we are still in contact with two of them (the other one had serious mental health problems so no contact), so not all bad, but not great either. It isn't realistic to do a relationship in the time left after parenting (is there such a thing?) so I'm not doing it again.

catinboots Thu 30-Dec-10 19:37:45

Crikey some of you need to calm down. I wasn't saying anything negative about single mothers - just the men they seem to attract! Most single mums I know are savvy, independent and hard-working. I was merely stating that these characteristics are obviously desirable to your standard cock-lodger.

catinboots Thu 30-Dec-10 19:38:54

I'm obviiously not as clever as some of you and I've not seen through these men and have let them into my life in the past!!

Janos Thu 30-Dec-10 19:39:02

I don't see DC meeting a boyfriend as a massive issue providing it's presented as this is mum's friend and not made into a big deal.

After all, it's perfectly normal to have friends round and about - we aren't sequestered away like nuns, and a friendless existence is pretty grim!

catinboots Thu 30-Dec-10 19:41:54

unlikelycracker - you're right it's such a hard call to make and I probably let DS1 meet too many bfs (not hundreds! probably 3 or 4 in ten years!)

But it is so hard to keep your relationship and your children seperate - when they are both such big parts of your life.

Janos Thu 30-Dec-10 19:42:27

"odd as in occasional"...of course ninah grin.

Janos Thu 30-Dec-10 19:44:15

catinboots, I've dated some wrong 'uns too. You'd be quite hard pushed to find any single woman who hasn't IMO!

hairyfairylights Thu 30-Dec-10 19:46:31

I've not been a single mum and believe me I have attracted my fair share of knob heads! So no it's not necessarily about being a single mum. It's about an awful lot of stuff.

catinboots Thu 30-Dec-10 19:49:39

Fair point. Maybe most men are know-heads grin

It's just a lot of single mums are more sussed and settled than your average 20-something who has no ties

catinboots Thu 30-Dec-10 19:50:00

knob-heads obviously

sungirltan Thu 30-Dec-10 19:55:48

i have a gorgeous friend who is a single mum. she is model tall and slim and dresses extemely well even though she has little money to spend on herself. she is bright and funny and works very hard at being a good parent, which she absolutely is. she has two dc by different men. the oldest has never seen their dad and the youngest's father is a prat. she has had a sucession of much younger boyfriends, and i dont mean by a couple of years. the same thing happens every time - they get together and the bf thinks my friend is this amazing sexy woman (she is!) and they often propose or suggest marriage. then what happens is a couple of years go past and the bf grows up a bit, realises they arn't ready to settle down and play house yet and they leave. friend is devastated. friend goes out in town, meets much younger man....and so on.

i'm not judging. i want my lovely friend to be happy, but its such an obvious pattern?

ValiumTinselton Thu 30-Dec-10 20:00:52

Sungirltan, a pattern for her as a person perhaps- not for her as a single mtoher.

Also, good looks don't make a woman any less likely to tolerate crappy behaviour.

catinboots Thu 30-Dec-10 20:03:14

sungirltan - I always went for men my own age or younger. DP is the first man I've been out with who is older than me (12 years older!)

My mum kept saying for years - "you need an older man". And maybe she was right, it takes a mature person to be a step-parent. And yes before you all shout at me, I know that maturity and age are not always linked

SantaIsAnAnagramOfSatan Thu 30-Dec-10 20:08:50

i'm guessing your friends shite taste in men came before the children, especially by the sound of the dad's.

not sure good clothes protect you from shite relationships either hmm

poshsinglemum Thu 30-Dec-10 20:24:33

I was more desperate for a boyfriend BEFORE I had dd to be honest.
Now I'm a single mum I can take em or leave em. I also put up with far less shit now.
This thread is a wee bit patronising.
Before I had dd I'd get off with anything in a nightclub. Now I am much more reserved. I have my family and any man has to be pretty special to be part of it.

catinboots Thu 30-Dec-10 20:26:17

How is it patronising?? It's about the men, not the single mums hmm

poshsinglemum Thu 30-Dec-10 20:30:22

I think that anyone can be a singlemuym because how on earth can you know what stunt your man is going to play next. even the most lovely, amazing men have affairs, get cold feet or fall out of love etc.
Men are humans and thus unpredictable. As are women. plenty of single mums I know have left theman because they simply refuse to put up with crap. Quite right too. We are only stigmatised because being a single mum is a threat to the patriarchy.

poshsinglemum Thu 30-Dec-10 20:32:05

sorry typos.

poshsinglemum Thu 30-Dec-10 20:32:39

Being a threat is a GOOD thing btw!

sungirltan Thu 30-Dec-10 20:34:57

the boyfiends have been ok - just the glaring issue with their age and the eventual heartbreak it causes. the most recent one was fab but as we all knew from the start he grew up and left her :-(

i absolutely agree that looks dont protect you from anything. i just think she sells herself short in every sense. we are in our 30's now. plenty of blokes out there with their own baggage - its not like early 20's when having a child is a dating stigma.

if its a thread about the men, then ok - the men she has dated have all been really quite wet!

SantaIsAnAnagramOfSatan Thu 30-Dec-10 20:39:26

because cat it suggests the women are passive objects in their own relationships/sex life/life in general that men gravitate towards.

we're adults, we choose the men we let into our lives or not. we're not sleeping beauties waiting for a kiss.

it is also a massive generalisation.

and think what you wrote - you didn't write the men are attracted to single mums. you wrote, the men single women attract. do you see the difference?

catinboots Thu 30-Dec-10 21:23:15

Yes I do see the diffrence. Maybe I didn't word it as well as I could.

But I do still think for a lazy man, a self-sufficent single mum is a far safer bet than a woman without children. Single mums are generally very reliable and dependable people. They can't be reckless and whimsical.

It's just going from one set of apron strings to another. And yes maybe not all single mums fall for these men. But I did.

catinboots Thu 30-Dec-10 21:23:31

excuse typos. Tired

ValiumTinselton Thu 30-Dec-10 21:31:09

That's so true PSM. Single mothers are hardly a different species, it could happen to even the most braggy smug loved up respectable woman.

ValiumTinselton Thu 30-Dec-10 21:36:12

Also, a lot of married women are putting up with crappy behaviour from immature men from within a marriage. But that's not a threat to the rest of society, or it's not so noticed and judged. It's not a negative stereotype. It's something that is encouraged by society really. 'ah don't split up over thaaaat.

Mists Thu 30-Dec-10 21:40:41

The "nice place to cock-lodge in" thing is a good point IME.

If you're a bit of a waster on long-term JSA like most of the men on the estate where I live, you have no hope of ever getting a decent place rented or otherwise unless you move in with someone with children.

My exH has deployed this technique countless times before during and after our marriage.

Doesn't mean that LPs accept any old idiot, no. I was far more discriminating after I had DD than I was before, hence having the shite exH grin

Trop Thu 30-Dec-10 22:08:45

Just because you attract them doesn't mean you have to date them does it?

I'm a single mum, have been for about 8 years although I have dated about half a dozen during that time. None of them seemed like keepers, so I didn't.

We are in control of our own love lives you know. Ok so we might not be that attractive to some due to having strings/baggage/whatever but the kind of guy I'm looking for is bigger than that and up to the task.

Not some freeloader who thinks I'm desperate.

I work full time and bloody hard, so I expect any potential boyfriend to do the same.

And I will settle for nothing less.

IF that means I am single for the rest of my life, shame on men.

SantaIsAnAnagramOfSatan Thu 30-Dec-10 22:20:07

good point valium (how come your name didn't get shortlisted?)

married women overall will be putting up with far worse from men than single mothers are. but that's normal hmm

seems cocklodgers (charming phrase) are attracted to mothers, preferably the mothers of their own children but other people's will do too. basically anyone whose willing to put up with such rubbish.

at least single mothers aren't married to theirs.

poshsinglemum Thu 30-Dec-10 22:22:02

We can't be reckless or whimsical therefore we have to date cautiously.
Reckless and whimsical women go for bad boys. I no longer see the appeal.

SOME single mums may date loosers. Plenty of chioldless women date loosers too. I don't get the logic in this thread at all.

SantaIsAnAnagramOfSatan Thu 30-Dec-10 22:23:17

and plenty of women have married them, had children with them and stayed married to them.

yuk

TwoIfBySea Thu 30-Dec-10 22:39:50

Maypole, it isn't that I wouldn't it is just that they wouldn't have me is the thing.

But I'm not desperate so I'll stick with how things are.

StuffingGoldBrass Thu 30-Dec-10 22:43:45

I must admit I don't agree with the 'don't introduce your boyfriend to your DC unless he commits' thing either. It's not actually harmful for DC to realise that some people have friends who stay the night and then go away again - in fact, a few casual sexual relationships are a much better thing to model for DC than desperate clinging on to a toxic relationship.

earwicga Thu 30-Dec-10 22:48:25

SGB - it is harmful if said children are looking for a father figure, and are constantly let down.

catinboots Thu 30-Dec-10 22:48:41

Yes but the point I am making I suppose is that the cocklodger targets single mums.

Maybe my view is warped - I have been a single mum since the age of 19 so I cannot really compare my dating patterns pre and post motherhood! I was barely I woman when I became a mum.

I also don't necessarily mean that it is an altruistic choice from the man. Just that that type of bloke naturally gravitates tirades his next mother figure.

mists yes sadly the most economically viable option for a young single loser is to move in with a single mum!

catinboots Thu 30-Dec-10 22:49:23

Towards not tirades

catinboots Thu 30-Dec-10 22:53:46

sgb very true. My ds1 seems very unaffected by my various boyfriends who have flitted in and out of our lives. He even takes the piss out of me over some of them!!! But he is an unflappable boy by nature and my father has been a key figure in his life .

Who knows? Maybe he'll turn out to be a cheating scumbag arsehole in a few years time. Then I'll be eating my words.

StuffingGoldBrass Thu 30-Dec-10 23:15:35

Earwigca: Not necessarily. children who are desperate for a father figure may need to have it explained to them gently that father figures do not just appear because they are wished for but that doesn't mean mummy can't have friends.

earwicga Thu 30-Dec-10 23:17:34

SGB - done, but it doesn't stop children having feelings.

StuffingGoldBrass Fri 31-Dec-10 09:37:22

Everyone has feelings: they are not automatically entitled to get everything they want, just because their feelings will be hurt otherwise.

superv1xen Fri 31-Dec-10 11:56:38

mists yes sadly the most economically viable option for a young single loser is to move in with a single mum!

yes totally agree catinboots. and it seems there are a lot of these losers about. hmm

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